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I am in the same position, my husband is a very light sleeper and for whatever reason, his potential for waking seems to add a layer of anxiety to my wakefulness that I don’t manage well. I completely relate to your comment about feeling less “trapped” when I’m alone. For me, I always start the night in the same bed, mostly because I fall asleep easily. When I wake up in the night, I will move rooms until I get sleepy again, then I return to our shared bed. I am at the point now, where the feeling of sleepiness is a very obvious shift in my body (complete regulation of my nervous system) and I most often get back to sleep after I return. Anyway not sure if this is helpful but I can sure relate to what you are experiencing!
I think that my current sleep window is too long. Since I shared my message, I have had several nights to experiment. I have changed the window to 12:00-6:30, which is a bit long but after 2 nights I had a deep sleep for about 3 hours, which felt great. I can see the value still, even adding a bit of time. For me it works. I have to remember to be flexible with my thinking and be open to changes.
