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For the past decade or more I used to nap most days. At lunch time I would drive down the road to a park and just close my eyes for 20 minutes or so and nod off within a few minutes and sleep for 10 minutes or so and wake up refreshed and alert. Days that I was too busy to nap I would feel more fatigued and worried. I also use to be able to use nap as a coping way to deal with stress. When I was stressed and tired I would actually relax and sleep for a bit.
Now with what I am dealing with I rarely nap unless I am exhausted and when I do I may or may not nod off and if I do I awaken right away. I figured that most if not all my co-workers don’t nap during the work day so I should just do the same. That and it also builds up more sleep drive which hopefully gives me a bit better sleep.
When it started I struggled with falling asleep, staying asleep and waking up early. The first issue was waking up early. I am on a low dose of zopiclone that it most likely helping with the onset. I don’t want to rely on it but at the moment both my GP and psychologist suggest I stay on for now until my sleep is more stable. When I first started CBT-I after 2 weeks I was happy with how things were and was talking about discontinuing and if next week looked good then I can go off. Well, the next week was a wreck and since then I’ve had pretty good sleeps and not so good sleeps.
Taking one day at a time.
@mac I have had some pretty zombie days and it can be on nights where I got more sleep than not. A band around my head. Slight dizzyness, eyes feeling dry, a little low mood, hard to focus. It sucks.
For sure. Just recently for example, nights where I would get a cushy 7.5 hours or sleep I was more tired and groggy than nights where I got about 5.5 hours. I am sticking with CBT-I but as my therapist is saying is not to be perfect, relax and not worry.
If I could just not worry and just go to bed because I am tired I am sure I would sleep rather well. Good sleepers don’t think about sleep, they just go to bed.
Everyone is different and I am still struggling here and there. One big point is sleep is as ingrained deep down to our most basic physiological needs. You never ever unlearn how to sleep. It is as basic as breathing. Try holding your breath. You will eventually take a deep breath.
Tips for not caring that may help
– Keep busy with work, school, social commitments. When you keep busy your mind through the day and evening won’t be as preoccupied with sleep
– Do have a wind down routine but don’t overdo it. Don’t do a bath, bust out the lavender, drink herbal tea’s, listen to music, use blue light blocking glasses. Doing it all may set up too much expectation. Keep it simple, read and have a tea or whatever.
– Progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness meditation and visualization may help. You may need to spend some time with it. It sounds like you already have from your previous post.
The mind always checking if it’s asleep or not is one I am trying to work through. It is more often if I try to nap during the day. Ill fall nod off and just as I do I wake up. I think it has to to with anxiety so I am trying to relax and meditate more.
Yes overall. In terms of the amount of sleep I would say about the same or slightly better. When this all started I would get 3-7 hours but was fragmented and with lots of frustration, anxiety and tossing and turning. Now I am getting 5.5 hours average but it is more consolidated. My day time functioning is overall better. The only caveat is that I take each day/night as it comes. I do feel like I am fragile and a few bad nights can derail me.
I am having the same problem. I can never sleep through until my alarm clock. I seem to be waking up between 4-5:30am. Since it’s so late in the night/morning I just try to sleep longer and I believe I do sleep another hour albeit lightly. From 6 to 7 is just laying there relaxing. They do say that the first part of the night is deeper and the second part is lighter but it just feels too light.
The other thing is that when I fill out my sleep logs I find I guess a lot on when I fell asleep, when I woke up and my actual wake up time. Basically the last 2 hours I am in bed but in and out of sleep.
Although traditional CBT-I contradicts ACT when it comes to stimulus control, when it comes to getting out of bed, I believe ACT can work better for some. There have been times when I woke up in the middle of the night and I would think about getting out of bed for a bit but chose to stay in bed and then fall back asleep quite quickly.
One particular area with ACT that I find useful is the less of a deal one makes going to bed or caring, the better and easier they fall asleep and stay asleep. The days I would wind down looking at the clock, drinking my tea, reading a book, taking a bath, dimming the lights etc I would have more trouble that night than nights where I just watch TV and feel like it’s about bedtime and go to bed.
Stimulus control is about the association with bed and sleep. If one stays in bed tossing and turning every night for hours may associate bed with being awake. If this is the case then SC is warranted and a part of CBT-I anyway
I think the best approach for most is to do both and go with your gut. They say if you are in bed more than 15-20 then get out especially if sleep doesn’t seem like it will happen. If you are tired and drowsy and don’t like the idea of getting out of bed to color then by all means stay in bed longer and see if sleep will happen.
Hello there,
Hopefully you will find some comfort in knowing you aren’t alone and a lot of people struggle with insomnia. In a day I can hear commercials and co-workers talk about how badly they’ve slept. The good news is this is relatively new for you (only a month) and you are nipping it in the bud early. Many struggle for years before they do anything about it. Other good news is that from what I am reading they didn’t find any medical reason for your insomnia other than the short term head pain.
The constant wired feeling can be anxiety or as you say “subconsciously anxious”. Sleep is important and as you said that you used to be a great sleeper so I can understand your worry about lack of sleep and its effects.
The therapist you are working with, is he/she certified to do CBT-I? or just a general therapist? One familiar with CBT-I may be able to provide more insight.
One thing that seemed to help me and is easier said than done is that after a few weeks of thinking and worrying about sleep, I started to give up. What I mean by that is the less I thought about it or worried about it, the better I slept. It is easier said than done and I still struggle but I do find excess worry exacerbates the issue.
Hi Susanne,
Yes I have but not for insomnia. I was considering consulting a naturopath for insomnia since I am pulling at everything to sleep better. I’ve decided not to because I am fairly certain they aren’t specialized in insomnia and will only provide the basics that you may already do. Sleep hygiene (cool dark room, no caffeine, exercise) and then anything natural would be valerian root, passion flower, kava etc which may help a little.
I think two people to consult would be your GP for any underlying medical conditions and then a therapist who specializes in CBT-I. If you feel comfortable with seeing a naturopath, by all means do but I wouldn’t expect them to provide much more than what you may already know or have tried.
When it comes to SR, the way it is suppose to work is you take 1-2 weeks of logs to see how much you actually sleep and then restrict it to that + half an hour or so. In other words if you started with being in bed for 9 hours and only sleeping for 7 then your SR would be 7.5 or even 7. What should happen is you spending 90% of that time sleeping thus re-enforcing bed with sleep. This alone can help a lot. Ideally there should be some improvement within a few weeks.
The problem that can arise is if one goes to bed early to try to catch up on sleep. This may lead to more tossing and turning and make the problem worse.
I seem to be getting 5-6.5 hours a night when I am stable. When things go off then I may have a few nights where it feels like I got like 2-4 hours. Those days are awful and hard not to think about it. I think part of it is anxiety but also that my sleep needs have changed. It kind of sucks because those extra 2 hours or so were nice and I usually would sleep through until the alarm clock. I am just taking each day and night as is. Trying to keep my work/life routine balanced and go to bed and wake up at roughly the same time.
I am not fully satisfied with how things are but overall it’s better than a few months ago. The big frustration is that bad nights or a streak of them just seem to happen without and rhyme or reason. I wake up in the middle of the night most nights but on good nights, I just turn around and go back to sleep, bad nights I am wide awake.
Hi Animegirl,
When it comes to insomnia, it is difficult to pinpoint the cause. It can be primary or secondary insomnia and a combination of various factors such as stress and genetics. Some simply require less sleep and don’t know it.
As for advice, here are some basic tips to start.
– No working, gaming, reading, TV in bed. Reserve the bed for sleep and sex only
– Have a wind down routine. Say about 30-60 minutes before bed. Try to keep it the same most or every night. For example light reading, journaling, coloring, bath, herbal tea. This will relax and calm you down and signal you that it’s your cue to start thinking about sleep.
– Go to bed only when you are tired. If you are still wide awake you won’t be able to sleep.
– If you are in bed and not asleep in what feels like 20-30 minutes, get out of bed. Tossing and turning will only add frustration and condition you to associate bed with staying awake. This also applies in your case with waking up at 3AM. If sleep doesn’t seem possible, get out of bed.
– After 30 minutes of being up, if you are tired go back to bed. Things to do in the meantime should be simple like coloring, reading, folding laundry.
– Avoid napping. If during the day you are idle and doze off a few times a day it will reduce your sleep drive and make it harder to fall asleep at night.
– Exercise. Some need it a bit more than others but it can help burn off some energy as well as your mind so you can tune out at night and stay asleep.
As for supplements, they are usually ineffective and may only work from time to time. Melatonin is only useful for jetlag and shifting timezones. You could try l-theanine that can help calm your mind a bit. If you aren’t tired it won’t work. Valerian root has mild sedative properties and may help but it may work one night and the next not work at all.
The best way to address your issue is to read up on CBT-I and follow either self guided, online or with a trained therapist. Good luck!
Thanks for the post. I did read the article. I am averaging about 5.5 hours per night. I have somewhat accepted it since my body doesn’t appear to want to sleep longer. It results in moments of fatigue, poor concentration and memory. Some days are better than others. What I find difficult is keeping myself occupied from 7am until 12:30am. I work, work out, socialize etc but when I am on my downtime I want to nap but really can’t nap more than drifting off for a few minutes and waking back up. I would be fine with the hours I sleep as well if it can be stable. None of this 2 hours one night, 4 the next and then 6 the other.
But I get what this article is saying. I find the more I accept it the easier it is to cope and accept. That alone helps me fall asleep a little better.
Sorry correction. Martin is right. Consolidating sleep does not lead to lighter, more fragmented sleep. In fact, it usually has the opposite effect. I guess I was sleepy when I posted it 😛
