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Hi Martin. Well, yes there’s been some stresses. I have a stay at home mom for a few years and my youngest is starting kindergarten this Fall. We talked about me going back to work at that time, and I’ve been both excited and nervous about this life change. Its also made me quite sentimental about my kids growing up. It seems that my anxiety got worse after a former boss contacted me about going to lunch sometime soon. Its a good sign for my career but makes me nervous. I admit I don’t deal with change well and frankly I’ve been mad at myself for handling this so poorly.
Hi Ximena, I know we have chatted together before and I just want to say hang in there, friend. I’m going through the same thing and I know what you mean, it consumes our thoughts to the point that we can’t focus on anything else.
Doing research on the internet can be good bad. Sometimes you find support and sometimes you get more scared. I’ve found this is true of many conditions – not just insomnia.
I’ve been working on CBT-I with a specialist and I do think it is helping. I’m far from cured and I have a long way to go, but I do think I’ve made progress. I know they are expensive and hard to find in may areas. Internet sites and books about this can be helpful if you can’t afford traditional treatment.
I’m a parent too and I understand your challenges. My first bouts of major insomnia came when my oldest was a baby, and she was sleeping fine but I’d worry about all taking care of her. A lot of my fear is that a lack of sleep with make me a bad parent. Just remember that you ARE good enough as a mom, a spouse, an employee. You are dealing with a health issue that MANY people deal with. You will get there, you just need to be patient.
Hugs!
Hi Dkdrake, I did all the sleep hygiene techniques too and it didn’t help. Most people have before they seek out help. I am doing CBT-I now and it is much different. But I do think you should get checked out by your doc first and foremost. I’m sure hormones have something to do with it. And give the weighted blanket a try. I just got one, and while it doesn’t help me much with sleep onset (my primary problem), I feel like I sleep deeper with it. Who couldn’t use some deeper sleep!
CBI-I trained counselors are hard to find. I live in a large metro area and there are maybe 1 or 2 who have cropped up in the last couple of years. Before that I couldn’t find any. Online courses can be helpful if you don’t have anyone close by. I do agree that one on one support would be better because they can tailor the treatment to your specific problems.
By the way, I understand what you are feeling. Its so hard when you don’t sleep, and then you try and try harder, which makes it worse. I’m in the early phases of CBTI training, and the best thing so far is that the therapist actually understands how I feel! Before that I never knew how common my thoughts/fears were.
Hi Ximena, I can absolutely relate to your situation. I have gone through a stessful period with my family and been prescribed sleeping pills to help me sleep. I have taken them for a few short periods in the past and been able to come off them once the stress dies down. However, this time has been incredibly stressful and I’ve also been fearful that I’ll never sleep again without the meds. I have worked with regular psychologist and now I just started working with a sleep psychologist, who understands my concerns better than anyone. But I absolutely understand what you are going through. How long has this been going on for you?
Its not over the top. Don’t feel bad about your feelings. People deal with traumas in different ways. And when it comes to our kids its hard not to be neurotic. Some of the things I worry about with my kids are ridiculous, but I can’t stop them. Parenting is so hard. I’m sorry for your trauma, I really am. Thinking of you and hoping peace finds its way to you.
Hi Mia! I am also a mom and understand what you are going through. I never had major sleeping problems until my oldest wast born. Being a mom is very stressful. I understand how the mind doesn’t shut off. I worry about being a good enough mom, about keeping them healthy, etc. I know I worry and lot and I’ve been told I’m a very sensitive person. My sleep ends up suffering as a result. Its hard when you are so tired but still can’t sleep. Have you talked to someone about your trauma?
Hi, I the opposite problem, in that I have trouble falling asleep. But I read your post and just want to say I understand how you feel, esp. when you say “why do I wake up at all”. Its so frustrating, especially when you get advice like “keep your bedroom cool, get blackout curtains, etc”. If only it were all that easy. I’m not sure how sleep specialists handle early waking, but I know it happens to a lot of people. I hope you find a solution. Hang in there.
Just wanted to update to say I’ve done a couple of nights “stimulus control” therapy, meaning I get up if I can’t fall asleep in my usual time. Right now I find it making me more nervous. I also have (with docs. OK) reduced my Ambien dose from 10mg to 7.5. I did ok for a couple of days but now its stressing me out. Maybe I’m putting a lot of pressure on myself. It also may have been some PMS too. Sorry if its TMI but I have found that PMS has made for pretty crappy nights.
Thank you! I’ve only been to one session so far but my doc talked about getting up and doing something relaxing if I’m not asleep within 30 minutes or so. I have a book and some Sudoku puzzles ready to go. I’m optimistic about the treatment and I really appreciate that my doc used the word “traumatic”. When insomnia happens I feel like I’m losing control of everything, and I fear those periods immensely. My most recent insomnia spell came after my husband started having insomnia for the first time in his life, and boy did that throw my sleep into chaos.
