[Jessica2405]

Hello,
I feel your situation is very similar to mine, I have had sleep anxiety for 10ish years, it started for me when I made a connection between being tired and feeling vulnerable, for example, I used to blush if say attention was directed at me, or I felt I was being judged, etc.. making me feel out of control .. This led to avoiding social situations, hyperfocus on sleep. I always felt better if I had a full night sleep, it kind of felt like wearing a suit of armor, due to this my connection sleep became very important to me, and he is where the problem began, as by trying to avoid sleeplessness, I created it.
In the past I have used sleep aids such as, valium, stilnox, temazepam, mirtazapan, melatonin, CBD oil, and tried natural therapies, ALL the supplements, hypnotherapy, CBT, saw a sleep psychiatrist, psychologist, tried yoga, meditation and even one went to a frog poison ceremony to face my fears.. I’m actually laughing now that I look at this in text, WHAT a ride! FYI – None of these methods worked, and have only lead to insomnia maintenance.
I have found more recently that the only thing that has helped me is accepting anxiety, I actually had a breakthrough last week, I realized my anxiety was just trying to help me, to keep me safe from the “danger” … and when I broke that down, I realized the danger was not really there, I was afraid of something that might happen, and I had to make peace with the idea that if it does happen, its not the end of the world, I have had to flip the idea that rather than avoiding difficult situations I’m going to lean into them, I’m going to see if I can get better at managing them, I guess like a little test to myself, so each time I can get better, kind of like going to the gym, I’m trying to focus on confronting things in a gentle way, like, it won’t happen overnight, but If I practice these feelings I’ll get better at managing them. I am currently working with my anxiety and it feels so good, last week I had a terrible night’s sleep, only a few hours, I got out of bed at 5am, I had ALL the feelings, tight chest, heavy head, bloodshot eyes, and the overwhelming sense of fear, so I spoke to that, over and over, and rather than waiting for the “nap” to reduce the pressure I committed to no naps, no safety strategies and no avoiding, for the first say 5 hours of the day I repeated to myself the mantra “my anxiety is just trying to keep me safe” – and I went ahead and did things I would normally avoid ALL day, and it felt fantastic, my anxiety did subside as the day wore on, by accepting my anxiety my body stopped producing the chemical cocktail that was keeping me in fight or flight mode, the threat is not real, and if someone happens to judge me so be it, how someone feels about me in this moment wont impact me at all, it’s just a thought, just a feeling and may or may not even be real, and it defiantly won’t matter in 50 years’ time, what will be important is that I lived how I wanted and did things that made me feel good.
For me, working with my anxiety is a game changer, as is working with sleeplessness, setting myself little challenges like, how can I get better at this, allowing myself the small wins and creating a feeling of being in control.
I realize this is a long reply, but I wanted to highlight how I had implemented Martins strategies and how they are working for me, hope it gets easier each day.

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