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Martin, please please help me. Does anyone at this forum has these light dreams that I’m talking about?
I don’t know what to do. I have only these ‘thinking’dreams’, no sleep whatsoever. Today I was at the dentist and he said my teeth are really worn out. I think it’s because I have no deep sleep. Help, I want this nightmare to end!
Dear Martin, I really don’t sleep for days. What I have are these ‘thinking’ dreams. I lie in bed for two hours and then all of a sudden I dream, very light, almost like thinking and then it stops and then I lie awake for 4 hours and then again I start to dream directly and then I lie awake again. I don’t fall asleep! On the days I fall asleep, like lukily tonight, I roll around for half an hour then I sleep til the morning appr. 5’o clock and have a early morning ‘thinking’ dream. It doesn’t feel like sleeping but it can’t be that the ‘thinking’ dream goes on for the whole night. In the morning my eyes hurt and I have a bad taste in my mouth and I yawn the whole time like when I don’t sleep at all. I so hope that the ‘thinking’ dreams stop happening. And what is worse I don’t think I have deep sleep. I have glasses and when I take them off there are really big holes where they were, my whole skin became very soft and I can push it in and it stays there for a while, my feet are vibrating, it doesn’t matter what I eat I don’t reduce any weight, my sole of foot became very soft and the texture looks clumpy and when it started my feet were hurting very bad, I can move the blood around with my thumbs! My doctor said she didn’t see anything like this before! My knees hurt sometimes and now my arms are hurting, too. For me it’s clear that this is all the outcome of my not sleeping for days and not having deep sleep! I have insomnia since almost four years and in the second year I developed all these weird symptoms. I’m so afraid it gets worse. Back then I stopped having 3 or 4 hours of sleep every night to having these ‘thinking’ dreams! Have you ever heard of those ‘thinking’ dreams, Martin? I can’t find anything about it on the net. I know that I make two mistakes: In the morning I stay for too long in my bed. I go to bed at 10 and I get up at 10. I’ve tried several times to get up at 7 but I just can’t bring myself to do it. And I know that insomniacs should go to bed when sleepy but I feel sleepy the whole day! At New Year’s Eve I went to bed at 1 and didn’t fall asleep, only these ‘thinking’ dreams again. And yes, the whole day I think about sleep, I can’t think of anything else, it’s impossible! And what is worse I think about suicide and I also have tried to take my life four times! I even got in contact with a society for assisted suicide and they denied my request because there is still a chance of recovery. I think it will stay this way to 99 %, shall I be alive for 1%? I’m so over it, Martin.
Thank you Martin for your kind words! I haven’t slept for 7 days now (again!), waiting for my 3 days of sleep to come. Everyday I feel so sleepy but nothing happens at night and even if I sleep I still feel so tired. I saw a video of you on YouTube where you had this balloon theory. That you put all energy in the day to get a very full blown balloon which bursts into sleep. I will try to stay active the whole day. I walked every friday for 2 hours in the woods but even then I didn’t fall asleep at night. Maybe I should do some sports. I’ve received this ‘thinking email’ form you, not to think about insomnia all the time but that is exactly what I do. All I can think about is sleep. It’s hard to keep your focus on other things. I really appreciate your daily emails and thank you for wishing me all the best. I hope this horrible nightmare will end soon. Btw I’m from Germany, so please have mercy with my grammar. Keep up the good work, bye bye.
