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Tara H, That sucks and I know what you mean. Whenever I’ve found something that I can fall asleep to, it always wears off after a while as that thing gets routine and your mind goes back to it’s old tricks. Just keep experimenting with things and just know you are not alone! I’m really coming to realize how deep rooted these psychological issues are that cause insomnia and, for me at least, it all boils down to anxiety about sleep itself. Even when I don’t feel anxious on a conscious level, I must be anxious subconsciously. I’m just going to keep all of these course materials and concepts in mind and just keep working on myself. It’s all we can do. Take care and know we are all here and rooting for you!
I had one of those panicked feelings last night. I went through the course a few months back and it helped. But I slowly went back to my bad habits and now I’m having insomnia again. So I re-accessed the course. Those panicked feelings are worst! I try to do the AWAKE exercise but I find it not too helpful. Since I am retired, I find it helps me to just tell myself, “Don’t worry, you can just sleep late in the morning”. This seems to help quite a bit but it also goes against the course teachings since you’re not supposed to sleep past the morning window. Then I get stuck in this bad cycle of not sticking to the window. It’s REALLY hard to stick to the window when I’ve had several nights of little sleep and during the day I feel awful. My mind tells me, “I’ve got to get some sleep tonight or tomorrow is going to be worse”. So after an hour of not sleeping I start the panic mode again. It’s a vicious cycle and really hard to break.
I’ve found often that listening to anything mildly interesting (you don’t want it to be too stimulating) distracts my mind from trying to sleep or thinking “I got to get to sleep”. Since this lessens my worry about sleep, it often allows me to fall asleep.
Great story! I’ve had insomnia most of my adult life, and I’ve been through some rough patches but I don’t think as bad as your husband. My wife has never understood and has no idea how to help. I think I can be intimidating for her, so she doesn’t even try. But recently, on my own, I feel I have slowly been able to get a handle on my sleep. The key for me was convincing myself that lack of sleep on any particular night is no big deal. I now go to bed and, if the thought pops into my head about maybe not sleeping well I just say to myself “So what? It’s just not that bad if I don’t.” I don’t even worry about what time I am getting to bed. If I stay up a bit later with my wife to watch a movie, I just don’t let it concern me. So far it’s working well. I may still take the course just to learn even more things.
