[MM]

Thanks, gsdmom. You’re right identifying and labeling struggling really does make a difference. It’s an important first step. Thanks for your encouragement. I am going to take a break from thinking about my sleep so much but I hope to post back with an update and see how all of you are doing in a week or two.

[MM]

Thanks, Deb! I had a lot of “there you go again” moments last night 🙂 Struggling seems to be my default and I can see this is very much learned behavior. At least I am catching it more and can practicing doing nothing. It’s funny how we are re-learning something we once did naturally when we were good sleepers.

[MM]

Deb- Thanks, I will be following this thread and will update in a couple of weeks. One quick question. With “thought noticing” it seems like the idea is to put a little space between you and the thought, to see it simply as brain chatter and that you don’t need to take it all that seriously. With the techniques that involve “welcoming” it seems more like exposure. That you are facing the thoughts to lose your fear of them. Is this how you view the two types of techniques and if so how did use them? For instance did you start with thought noticing and then if you found the thoughts overwhelming move on to the welcoming techniques?

gsdmom- Hi, thanks for commenting. That’s interesting about having more daytime energy from learning to rest better in bed. I read that in the book but wouldn’t have guessed that it would have made a big difference. Are you also sleeping better after doing ACT?

[MM]

Hi, Deb-

Good point about mindfulness. I hadn’t thought of it that way. It sounds like consciously doing nothing after mindfulness would be helpful. Increasingly I feel like I have the ability to do nothing in bed. I am guessing that’s how normal sleepers do it before they drift off, I don’t know!

I’ve had insomnia for 35 years. It started in my early twenties when I was taking xanax for depression/anxiety. I must have had rebound from the xanax and then it became a thing when my anxiety attached to the insomnia. For years, it was just sleep onset insomnia and then at some point it became maintenance insomnia so yes I have both.

Last night was much worse. I had some legitimate and rather intense new worries and I was having problems dealing with those thoughts. At one point I did try welcoming the thoughts and was very surprised to find my body relaxing. My muscles were relaxed but I still felt wired. This seems like progress.

-Mike

[MM]

Hi, Deb-

I agree I need to commit to 2-3 weeks of ACT, relax, and to give it a chance to work. I think that the simple act of committing will take away some of the anxiety. To move beyond the worry of whether it was right to quick CBT-I or whether ACT is the way to go and just jump in.

Last night went better. I realized yesterday that every time I try a new approach for my insomnia that my sleep gets worse because of anxiety. Anxiety about whether I am doing it right, self-monitoring, increased attention to my sleep, etc. So last night I let go of all of my concerns and my only intention was to not struggle, to “just be”, and to “not try.” I have struggled for so long with my insomnia that on some level I think I am always *trying* to go to sleep even if I don’t realize it!

This mindset shift seems really important for me and I did pretty well with it last night. My thoughts did get going at some point and so I did a little mindfulness, which was just feeling the pressure of the bed. Some thoughts did pop up and I did “notice” them to try to give them a little distance and then go back to mindfulness. I think keeping it simple for right now is important for me. Anyway, last night I fell asleep within 10 minutes, slept 30 minutes longer than average, and about 30 minutes less than what I need to truly feel good.

I think staying in bed gives me a lot of anxiety because I can see the strong role of conditioned arousal associated with the bed and it’s so hard to relax with this. For instance, many nights I am fighting to stay awake in front of the TV and the second I get into bed I am wide awake. This is why SC made such sense to me and why it’s anxiety making to hear the exact opposite even if I understand the rationale behind the approach. But the bottom line is that I need to make friends with my bed again and SC didn’t work so it’s time to try ACT. I think lying in bed for hours at time is too much for me right now but I can stay in bed for longer and work on being more relaxed. With daytime and nighttime mindfulness practice I think things will get easier and then I will be able to embrace spending longer periods in bed.

Thank you for responding! I read a lot of your posts above and they’ve been very helpful.

[MM]

Any ACT-ers out there?

I just did 3.5 weeks of SRT and while my sleep was improving from week to week it was very slow going and the cumulative effects of increased sleep deprivation, anxiety about my sleep window, and recent stress made it too difficult to sustain.

I read The Sleep Book and have started to try the ACT techniques. The book makes perfect sense to me but I am struggling with a couple of things. First, while doing the techniques I have doubts that they will help. The general mindset of letting go of the struggle seems like it will be hugely helpful but noting thoughts or describing them feels sort of empty. This leads to anxiety that the techniques won’t work or that I am doing them wrong, which also causes anxiety.

Second, the whole staying in bed thing is hard for me. I can do this to an extent to practice the ACT techniques but laying there for hours is too much for me, especially since I have a long history of that before trying SC. Is it OK to practice the ACT techniques in bed but then get out of bed for a break and then return to practice more if need be?

Thanks in advance for any help,

Mike

[MM]

That makes sense, Martin and thank you for your response. I made it 3.5 weeks with the sleep restriction and while my percentages were improving, the cumulative effects of the sleep restriction, anxiety about the sleep window, and life stressors made it too much to sustain. I am going to try a few weeks of ACT and see where I get with it. If I ever need to come back to SR I will know what to expect and have more tools to work with. Thanks for all you do! Watching your videos has given me hope!!

[MM]

Hi, Martin-

Thanks for your response. I was asking because on day 24 I was reaching my breaking point and the trend of improvement seemed modest. Also, the shortened sleep window didn’t bother me so much in the first week or so but by 24 days with accumulating fatigue, irritability, foggy mind, etc I had developed intense anxiety over the sleep window. That’s why I was asking about a longer window. Yes, I have been getting out of bed when I experiencing high arousal or agitation.

I did extend my window from 6:30 to 7:20 for a few nights to get some relief and that week I had 91% sleep efficiency. I know that’s a big jump. It was just supposed to be for a few nights but now I am wondering if I should keep the longer window and use some ACT techniques to address the bedtime anxiety. I’ve read that even modest sleep restriction can have significant positive affects and maybe this plus ACT would be good combination for me. It doesn’t take much sleep restriction to make drowsy at night. Thanks very much.

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