[R.E.M]

Hi @Manfred

I used to struggle with bad sleep anxiety too. What helped me is meditation before bed and concentrating on my breathing. I also started ignoring the sensations after a while and I found they went away.

Sounds easier than it is but don’t fear your anxiety. Your anxiety isn’t there to hurt you, intact there’s been many times it’s protected you. At this time, it’s just a mismanaged. Come at it with compassion, imagine it as a scared little child and comfort it. It doesn’t mean to hurt you either. Anxiety just doesn’t know how not to fear having a sleepless night. What anxiety tells you in your head are just thoughts– they’re not real or the truth about reality or what is going to happen. Just thoughts. I know the sensations that come after the thoughts make things seem so real but it’s just your reaction. Your anxious mind won’t hurt you and it doesn’t exist to. See it is as a friend.

Today I woke up from my little bit of sleep and actually wanted to hug my anxious self. I know she doesn’t mean to do this, keep me up all night fearing a sleepless night while causing it at the same time. She’s just trying to protect me.

Getting out of bed helps significantly @Manfred, if you’re sleeping anyway, why stay in bed? I’ve not mastered this myself and it’s probs the most hated bit of CBT-I but I’m getting better. Let’s keep trying our best, we’ll see results soon.

[R.E.M]

Re-reading this thread gives me faith a bit, I’m currently going through a rough patch with my insomnia and I feel like the setbacks are getting more frequent. Still getting up at 8am and going to bed at 1:30am. Makes me wonder if I should make my window tighter but resisting the urge to change things as this just increases the ‘fight’ with insomnia. I hope by actually putting the effort to get out of bed (I’ve struggled with this all my life!) I’ll be rewarded eventually. I’ve only been doing SR for 2 weeks so maybe it’s too short to know? @Scottctj

I will keep going. Even though I feel like I’ve taken several steps back. At least sleepless nights make me panic less, so that’s an improvement, I used to be really scared of them. I just hope the frequency of them goes down a bit. Any words of encouragement are appreciated!

[R.E.M]

I just thought i’d add a few things that helped me with sleep anxiety since we are on that topic. It’s not as much as it used to be, I used to get panic attacks before bed and heart palpitations before bed. I rarely have this anymore, even during consecutive bad nights. I guess that means my body is slowly improving.
– I used to get back in bed in the afternoon and relax/do some meditation so that getting into bed a night wouldn’t be this thing that I was leading up to as I’d already done it
– Continuing on with my day was a big one. I would go on walks everyday even if I felt tired, it made me feel like I could still have a good day
– Cold blast of water in shower before bed. I feel like this has dimmed my anxiety symptoms quite a bit and I hate cold water! (Might keep you awake but it works for me)
– Don’t be angry or try get rid of your anxiety. Our anxiety keeps us safe. I imagine mine as a little child who is just a bit deregulated now with everything going on. Try show it and yourself compassion.
– Before I go bed I like to write encouraging stuff to myself, either about sleep or in general.
– Meditation really changed my life. Not to sleep necessarily, but how to focus on one thing and calm down. I use the Calm app and do the daily calms, they have some nice life lessons.
– I also use the DARE app, I like the ‘S.O.S’ bit. He has some nice encouraging voice notes when you feel anxious, feel like giving up or have a setback…ect

@Manfred it’s so true, sleeplessness is just uncomfortable but not deadly. But anxiety reacts like it is and it feels so real when you’ve been swept away by your anxiety. Hopefully with practice, we’ll be able to make space between our thoughts and reaction.

[R.E.M]

Hi everyone, I’m glad my thread has given people a little space to vent. Would be so good if we had a CBT-I support thread on this forum, because going through this alone can be hard (I found it hard even with an online course!) I’ve been dealing with issue for 6 months now but it’s taught me a lot…

@scotttj i’m going to bed at 1:30 and getting up at 8:00 atm, i am seeing some improvements but touch wood. Getting out of bed and reading for 10/20 minutes really helped a lot, and i managed to some sleep a few nights ago. Slept like a baby yesterday, bit tired today but we move forward. Today can still be a good day 🙂

I think to make the wakefulness less lonely, i like to read, listen to a podcast or get out of bed and try again in 20 minutes. sometimes the body just needs a reset. I think ACT is really useful but in one of podcasts, they called it an ‘advanced technique’ it does take a lot to stay in bed and accept your wakefulness. I also think meditation is really great, not just for sleep but it helps you learn how to concentrate on your breathing. That’s how i get to bed on my goodnights.

We will eventually all get through this, everything will pass. Just remember to be kind and patient with yourself, rome wasn’t built in a day. Sometimes there will be painful, hard moments, but we’ll get through it. And i always like to remind myself, if you’re going through a setback, it means you’re about to make a breakthrough. Hope you’re all doing well.

[R.E.M]

Hi Scott

I felt really happy over getting 6 hours. I felt great! But I feel like occasionally shouldn’t be weekly/fortnightly and that wasn’t normal for me in the past. But maybe I need to accept I may never get back to sleeping how I was and stop comparing?

Yes it was the lack of support on the thoughts I was having and felt the CBT side was mostly ignored. And I think my thoughts about sleep perpetuates the insomnia. I also just found it stressful and being sleep deprived and not knowing when my window would increase made me frustrated.

I try self soothe by writing positive/comforting thoughts in a diary and tell myself I’ll be okay no matter what. I think I just find the sleepless nights really lonely and it almost makes me feel ill to see the sun rise knowing I haven’t slept at all.

[R.E.M]

Hi Scott. Thanks for your reply.

My bed time shifted quite a bit when I moved, so I used to go bed around 1, but now I was going bed at 11:30/12:00 these past two weeks and waking up at 8:00 – 8:30, generally sleeping through the whole night but had issues waking up before my alarm. Yes I’ve mostly been getting up at 8 (maybe the most I get up is 9:30) but I’m going to keep in consistent now.

My history with CBTI is interesting. I did an online course for (6?) weeks which worked to an extent but I wasn’t doing stimulus control nor waking up at my set time or not taking naps. I was still having one bad night a week which frustrated me but I managed to sleep 6 hours per day.

What really annoyed me was the lack of support and less concentration on the thoughts side which was what was driving insomnia for me. I felt like I also didn’t have any support to deal with bad nights, so those were still tripping me up and causing fear.

So during Christmas break, I put my course on hold and haven’t really been back.
Then I had a big set back and introduced a casual sleep window (1:30 – 8, I think) which helped as well as ACT/DARE methods. That helped get me through but every two weeks I was still having a bad night and early morning awakening.

So it’s just been a really frustrating time. I think I need to stick with it longer but CBT-i is hard without proper support. I think I just keep going in circles. I would be happy if I had a few months off from this insomnia thing, having a bad night once a week/two weeks never used to happen to me.

Sorry for the rant, it’s just been a long 6 months of this despite being a really good sleeper before

[R.E.M]

Hi everyone

I’ve recently started using the DARE approach for my insomnia which has helped quite a bit overnight. The issue I’m having now is that being ‘ready to accept the anxiety’ actually makes me anxious and I struggle to fall asleep which brings the anxiety (which I guess is the whole point of the DARE approach) I’m just wondering when it gets better? Has anyone else used this approach? Thanks

[R.E.M]

Thanks for the reply Scott. To get myself back on track, I’ve started going bed at 2:00/2:30 and attempting to wake up at 8. i’ve also started using the DARE method to get me through nights where I don’t fall asleep right away or wake up in the middle of the night or earlier than my alarm. I’m hoping that the tighter sleep window will get rid of my sudden early morning awakening.

Do you have any tips for feeling like if you change your routine, sleep somewhere different or have a stressful impacting sleep? I always immediately assume my sleep will be affected, which makes me want to avoid these things. Is there anything I can do? Thanks

[R.E.M]

My insomnia hell has lasted a similar amount to yours, but yet at almost 4 months I am still not seeing any end in sight. Although your words are very encouraging and I will keep mind of this…thank you. What worked the most for you in the sleep restriction programme?

[Author]

Posts