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Deb – Thanks for those reasons.
Burn – Okay. I understand it now. Like I said, I usually let my mind just wander and I can do that now. I had trouble doing that up to a couple months ago. But my problem is that after I go to sleep, I wake up about an hour after. I suppose it’s the same principal. Once I get my mind to relax, I will not suffer the awakenings so much.
Hi Burn. Thanks for asking the questions. I’m not sure I follow your last paragraph. Do you mean she wants you to compare how you do your daytime mindfulness to how you do your nighttime mindfulness? You were approaching them differently?
I can see sense in her second response too as I do that sometimes as well. But mostly, I followed Deb’s practice of just letting my mind go blank or letting it wander. Did you get a chance to ask her about lying in bed for long periods of time?
Thanks again for asking her our questions.
Deb – One other thing I forgot to ask in my last post. If they aren’t too personal, I would be interested in your reasons as to why you think you healed so fast. Thanks.
Hi Deb. Thanks for getting back to us. I hope everything is okay with your parents. I wanted to make a couple comments on your posts. First, the only real reason I wanted to restrict my sleep more was because even though I rest in bed when I am not sleeping, I do get sore if I am in bed for more than a couple hours. I was hoping to decrease the time in bed that I lie awake just to avoid that soreness from lying there. After last night, I am not worried about fragmented sleep or regressing to the point of being afraid to go to bed again. I had a pretty good sleep last night. I don’t know if it was because I had a big sleep drive or what but I slept deeply for a couple hours, was in and out of sleep for a couple hours and then lay awake and rested for about an hour. I had no worries or issues when I was lying there awake. I did have an issue with a bad dream when I was in and out of sleep but that is natural and it passed. As for having a session with Dr. Kat, I would really consider it but being hearing impaired like I am, I would not be able to carry on a conversation with her. I think one of the main issues still causing my insomnia is that I really have no one to distract me from it. I am a single adult after a divorce and have no kids. So, I tend to carry on conversations with myself and they naturally tend to center around my insomnia. Of course that happens less now that I use the tools and mindfulness and I am working on continuing that. I also realize hanging around on this forum thread a lot also tends to keep my mind focused on insomnia so I am going to try to spend less time here. In retrospect though, ACT has been good for me. I have less anxiety and I do believe I have more energy from staying in bed rather than fighting it by doing SC. I know this because I am not falling asleep at my desk the following day like I used to do after I practiced SC. I am also going to incorporate more positive thinking about my insomnia as Pam suggests. Thanks again for being a resource to us in this thread.
Thanks for the suggestion gsdmom but I have to agree with Mac that this isn’t gluten related. All of this started right after I got the insomnia and the insomnia was definitely stress related. Thanks for the input though. I talked to a friend today and she put me straight that being afraid about entering the bedroom at night is an unwelcome thought that can be addressed by ACT. While I am not totally afraid of the bedroom yet, let’s just say that gsdmom’s question and Deb’s response put the thought in my mind and I will need to address it. I am going to decrease my SW by a half hour tonight and I am very much interested when Burn asks the Sleep Doctor tomorrow about mixing SR with ACT. Especially mixing SW with ACT.I feel a bit zombieish today but I know it could be worse and I am surviving. Just have to keep using the tools. But I am concerned that ACT is turning out to be like CBT-i where I would get one or two good nights followed by three or four bad nights. Again, need to practice the mindfulness. I let the unwelcome thoughts linger in my mind way longer than I should before I remember to use mindfulness in order to get rid of them.
Well gsdmom. I think I am doing what Deb warned you about yesterday and that is worrying about sleeping in the bed again. Last night was rough for me. I fell asleep okay but only for about an hour. Then I thought I would never fall back to sleep but after about two hours, I did fall back asleep but only for about 2 hours at the most. Then I was awake for the rest of the night. The odd thing is when I woke up both times last night, I was really relaxed and didn’t have to use the tools much. But I still couldn’t get back to sleep. I am now wondering if I am afraid of the bed again. I feel relaxed while I am lying there but I am starting to wonder how I will sleep at night as bed time approaches and I know that isn’t good. I try to be accepting of whatever sleep I get and as I said, I am relaxed in bed, but it does get frustrating when I almost keep nodding off but don’t actually fall asleep. You would think that my built up sleep drive would help me sleep longer but this is my second bad night in a row. This is actually the same thing that happened with SR. I started fast but then slowed down even faster. I think the “honeymoon” period Deb was talking about with ACT might be over for me. I am very interested in what the doctor tells Burn about mixing SR and ACT because I am thinking about cutting my time in bed from 7 hours to 6 hours. Are you still sleeping good every other night?
Hey Mac. Sorry to hear you fell back into the insomnia pit. Of course you will come out of it again. Just go back to what you were continuously doing and keep at it as you know it worked for you before. It will work again. You know how to break the cycle. Are you doing SC as well as SR? Even though you got 6 hours of sleep, it still might not have been “good” sleep and that is why you feel lousy today. Somehow, you have to figure out how to address the special event insomnia triggers and you can stay out of the cycle for good.
Burn – Could you ask the doctor another question for me? According to the Meadows book, we are supposed to go to bed in a relaxed and accepting manner as to whatever sleep we get. But what if we are in a very positive mood that we will sleep well that night and also that our insomnia will soon be over with? Is that positive thinking detrimental to us in case we don’t sleep well that night and we become disappointed and discouraged? Should we not go to bed in a positive mood? It may sound stupid but sometimes I think I sabotage myself by being in such a positive mood when I go to bed at night. Hopefully, you can ask her if we should tone down our emotions.
By the way, you said you talk to her Thursday morning. What time zone are you in? Thanks again.
Deb – I have a question for you as to how you approached bedtime this last time that you started ACT. Please read it carefully as this is very important to me. When you went to bed, did you say to yourself that you were only going to rest and that you would accept whatever sleep you got? Or did you look forward to going to bed in anticipation of getting a good night’s sleep that night? OR, was it a combination of the two? You went to bed in anticipation of getting a good night’s sleep but if you didn’t, you would accept any sleep you got? I ask this because I am more of that last statement. I go to bed in high spirits because I feel I am going to get a good night’s sleep that night but if I don’t, I can accept what I get. I wonder if by embracing that last statement I am somehow not accepting my insomnia? I do feel as if I am going to break the insomnia soon but I don’t know if being that positive is hurting my sleep.
Borgesbi – Yes, we are alike. I can lay there for a couple hours quite calm and not fall back to sleep. It could be because we are subconsciously monitoring ourselves. It will just take time to break that. It certainly can’t be because my sleep drive is low as if it was, I wouldn’t be so tired the next day.
Deb – Possibly but I don’t think so. I do have some anxiety when I wake up and there is the concern about how I will feel the next day but the tools make most of this go away pretty quick. Then I just lay there and let my mind wander Sometimes I direct it into an area where I had some pleasure, like a recent motorcycle ride. But after I do that, then I let my mind wander again. As long as I don’t have any uncomfortable thoughts, I continue to lay there and just drift. I do notice that the longer I lay there, the less chance I have of falling back to sleep. Now THAT could be my problem as I might be setting myself up for failure if I don’t fall back to sleep quickly. It’s just going to take time. Tonight will be the end of my 3rd week on ACT and I know it can take two to three months before I see improvement. I am going back to Meadows book frequently to brush up on techniques as he gives different ways to accept and welcome troubling thoughts and sensations.
Hi Karen. Two quick questions. How long do you ssleep for on an average night now and what is your SW? Thanks.
Ok, first bad night in four nights. Last night I woke up after approximately 3.5 hours of sleep and no matter how much welcoming and tools I used, I could not get back to sleep. But, that can be expected. I just move on from here. I really need to catch my unwelcome thoughts sooner than what I am doing. I am pondering on them and becoming involved in them too long before I realize it and then have to detach from them.
