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Your reply is very reassuring, thank you for taking the time in writing that. I finally slept well last night, but admittedly I was exhausted. However, I woke up this morning concerned and worried about tonight- usually this doesn’t happen. Typically I’ll start worrying about sleep as night comes closer. I think it’s because I just want to figure something out in particular that I haven’t been able to, and honestly I think once I conceptualize it accurately (and get your input on), it will be much less of a problem. What I’m about to write is what I think is the root cause of my sleep problem. It’s the thing I’m mainly worried about:
When I lay down to go to sleep, it doesn’t take me long to get into the first stage of sleep. The problem is, once I notice that I’m “pseudo-dreaming” or that I’m having dream-like thoughts, I get this wave of anxiety and wakefulness/awareness. I realize I’m about to fall asleep and I get scared/aroused, and this happens many times a night. It does stop at some point, but for some reason I remain awake (or I’m lightly sleeping and think I’m not). It kind of feels like a conditioned reaction at this point. Is the cause of this because of my thoughts, or is it an automatic reaction that I’ve unfortunately developed over time? How do I deal with this rush of wakefulness/awareness and anxiety as I’m on the cusp of sleep? Do I get out of bed and do something else? Meditate, or choose to ignore it? I think it was important to get more specific because my attention plays a role in this, not just my thoughts.
I feel that once I figure this out, my insomnia will be resolved.
“How do I deal with this rush of wakefulness/awareness and anxiety as I’m on the cusp of sleep?” That’s the question.. Thank you.
It’s weird because it feels like at some point in the night, I stop worrying about everything but I remain conscious and can’t fall asleep anyway until about 5am. That’s what it felt like last night. My sleep anxiety and sleep monitoring are the worst at the start; I’ll catch myself falling asleep, become more alert and get that bad feeling in my stomach simultaneously. At some point in the night it bothers me less, but I still can’t sleep. Is it possible that there’s this residual sub-conscious worry?
Thanks a lot for the content. I watched a podcast with you and this older woman, and what really impacted me the most was when she said she “just stopped caring” about her insomnia. She stopped worrying about it. I went on for about a week of caring much less about not being able to sleep (and had great sleep as a consequence) by introducing thoughts that I believed in, but then I remembered sleep monitoring one evening, and I started worrying about that specifically. I haven’t slept well for 2 days. Also, I think it’s important to mention that I also stopped taking melatonin 2 days ago- I don’t know which is contributing the most to my lack of sleep lately.
I was doing so well and feel sad about the past couple of days. If this keeps up, I will take your course or get coaching from you. I’ve had insomnia for 3 months or so now and I don’t want to make my sleeplessness a hard pattern to break.
At the time, I was getting out of bed randomly. I just wanted to say that this was helpful advice and motivated me to make that change- now I wake up around 7:30am (with the exception of today, I fell asleep at 5am last night, kept waking up until 8:30am). So thanks for that.
I was doing really well for a week. I’d get 4-6 hours a night and I felt great everyday. I think this is because I managed my thoughts; whenever the idea of not being able to sleep tonight crossed my mind, simply thinking “I’ll stay up all damn night, I don’t care” was sufficient to ward it off. However, 2 days ago I remembered the cause of my insomnia in the evening; sleep monitoring. I remembered the feeling associated with it (dread), and it turns out that I’m more concerned and worried about sleep monitoring itself more than I am of not getting a good nights sleep. Needless to say, I haven’t slept well in 2 days. Can you be sleep monitoring even when you feel like you’re not?
Also, I just wanted to add: also 2 days ago, I stopped taking melatonin. I was taking 4mg of melatonin for a couple of months every night. Do you think me quitting it has anything to do with my lack of sleep lately?
If this post doesn’t pick up any momentum, I intend on creating another thread. I really want others insight on how to manage sleep monitoring, and input on the melatonin situation.
