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HI Ryan,
Thanks for reaching out. So sorry for the delay. I thought I had responded to you -but, turns out my message didn’t post. My apologies. The podcast was indeed fun and an honor for me. I’m glad you found it helpful.As for your question: the nighttime arousal and wakefulness after 2-4 hours of sleep was absolutely the most challenging for me and to some degree still is. On the nights I have trouble with sleep, the problem of not being able to return to sleep is the issue. However, it has and continues to improve and become less frequent. so don’t give up on this. Sleep will win.
Now to your question.. Yes, Yoga and meditation and the relaxation audio provided by Martin were and still are things I turn to as daily practice for the purpose of relaxation during the day. I find that a daily practice that involves one or more of these was key for me in diminishing the arousal system. Just so you know, I never practiced yoga nor mediation before my CBTI training which started in December 2019. I added it to the CBTI course during my 13 weeks in the program. So i’m fairly new at this and don’t have all the answers. I have a very active mind (in mediation circles they call it a “monkey mind). I recognized I needed to train my monkey mind to be active when appropriate . This was not just for sleep purposes but for overall well being. Meditation and mindfulness training has been of great help. However, that’s not all of it. “Letting go” for me also included an acceptance that it was “ok” whether I sleep through the night or not. I’ve learned to let go of judging myself for this and re-frame the wakefulness when it happens. . This took time. If i have a night now when i wake and can’t easily return to sleep i often read in bed. When I put the book down, I think thoughts of gratitude for this quiet and peaceful time I’ve given myself in the middle of the night. I always read something inspired, positive and hopeful. (anything by Pema Chodron lately. ).
Additionally, I got to a place where I recognized that it was simply time to let go of all the daily efforts around sleep. No listening to podcasts, online research, no more sleep diaries, no daytime ruminating or worry about how it might be tonight.. just let it be. When I wake in the night, I immediately tell myself, “it doesn’t matter if I return to sleep or not” tomorrow will be what it is… I can handle it…. and that’s that. While you may think you’re not waking up anxious, you actually are probably thinking on some level ..” shi@#t… I’m awake.” This was true for me. I also let myself stay in bed more than I used to if awake. If I feel relaxed in bed,I stay there. For me the constant getting out of bed and returning 30 minutes later, often was more frustrating than laying awake in my comfortable bed where the conditions are right for sleep. So now if I wake up and I’m not frustrated, I just stay in bed. I find this is better for me.
On the nights you do sleep through the night or wake up and fall back to sleep easily, perhaps remind yourself that your body is capable of this. Celebrate it a bit in the morning! Maybe just a conscious practice of gratitude for a restful night. I found my confidence increased in my ability to return to sleep when I paid some attention to the successes. Martin was key in encouraging me to acknowledge the good nights more than I was.
You’re right that on “good” days, when you’ve had sufficient sleep it’s easier to expel sleep thoughts than when you feel intense fatigue. Me too. I think that’s normal. On those days, (and this still happens to me) I keep busy with anything other than worrying or ruminating about last night. I remember that tonight is another fresh opportunity to sleep well. That what happened last night is in the past and has no bearing on tonight. Also, when I get that wonderful feeling of “sleepy” whether during the day or not, I pause and pay attention. I want my mind to remember what this feels like so that when I wake in the night, I recognize the cues for sleepy more easily.
Ryan, there’s probably more I could say, but wonder after you read this if other questions pop for you? if so, don’t hesitate to reach out.
You can do this! If you’ve fixed the falling asleep component, you’re already so much better off than you were before. You will beat this!
Take good care,
JenniferI certainly have relapses as well. I find that compressing my sleep window works well. So I immediately go back to a restrictive window to build sleep drive- then I up my game on the things I do to diminish the arousal system. For me that’s meditation and yoga. Getting my head right in the hour before bed is also effective. Hope this helps.
