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Hope things start getting better for you soon, Delv. Yes it’s that darn anxiety that always gets in the way.
Hi Chelkee – it sounds like you’ve developed conditioned insomnia which is what most of us on this forum have. That means that you you need reconditioning to heal, not medication, hormone therapy, meditation or yoga, although some of those are good practices but won’t help with the insomnia.
Please read this website to understand what conditioned insomnia is and what you can do to cure it. Then read the forum threads of those who are practicing the reconditioning behaviors of SR and SC and are getting better.
Thanks for sharing, both Karen and Borgesbi. Borgesbi – you may want to copy your post and put it on the other thread “Support Group for those doing SR” because it will help others there. It’s very encouraging to see how you persevered during those first very difficult 5 weeks and as a result, now you are getting better. I agree with you that’s so important to cling to any small improvement to help keep ourselves going. About the light sleep – I’ve also experienced that at times and it should go away.
Karen – I’m sure you’ll get to the point where a glass at wine at dinner will make no difference to your sleep. But as you said, your recovery is fragile right now. But over time you’ll be able to relax more and more. I’m finding that out for myself where I can take more liberties than I could in the early weeks.
How’s everyone doing? Mac? Steve? Slarus? Delv? I saw on the thread “Encouragement” that Borgesbi is getting better. Borgesbi – maybe you can share your progress here as well to encourage others. You’ve had insomnia for a couple years like Mac, so it’s great that you’re finally getting better.
I’m doing better. Had a couple rough nights the beginning of the week but now I’ve had 4 good nights in a row with the last two nights of 7 to 7.5 hours of sleep. I only had to do SC once this week. I’m also getting to the point where I don’t have to worry so much about my wake up and get up time although in general, it’s pretty consistent. As long as I’m tired enough when I go to sleep, I do fine even if I sleep in a bit or lie in bed for awhile before getting up. So things are getting more relaxed which is great.
Sorry you’re having a hard time, Delv. I feel for you. Maybe try waiting to go back to bed when you’re really sleepy and see if that works.
I think you have to log out first. Then at the top you will see “Resources.” Listed under that tab is “Success Stories and Case Studies.”
Yes I’ve been doing this for 7 weeks but it feels like it’s going to take a long time until I’m “fixed.”
Delv – sorry you’re having a rough time. Especially since you had been doing much better for quite awhile. I hope you can figure it out and start getting some good sleep.
Steve – fortunately there are people on this website who’ve given testimonies on how they no longer have the insomnia. Check them out for encouragement. They are former clients of Martins.
Slarus – having a bad night or two after some good ones is normal. I know it’s discouraging, but that’s just how it goes. I had 5 good nights in a row and then last night was tough, not falling asleep until 3:00. So this happens to all of us and it is normal.
Steve – sounds like your sleep is gradually increasing, so you’re going in the right direction.
A note about strictness – I think the “Experts” like Martin and Sasha have to set strict guidelines or else everyone would bend them and want to relax, because CBT-I is not easy as we all know. I believe it’s best to adhere strictly to the guidelines as much as possible. You don’t want to sabotage yourself, especially when you’re just starting out and have no history of success behind you. So please don’t take my relaxed attitude as the model to follow, especially you newbies. I did 8 weeks of this back in January & February and am now on my 7th week the second time around. I’m getting more and more experienced in what works and doesn’t work for me. It might not work for you.
Slarus – Yay for you! I think we might be similar in that we both have sleep onset insomnia and our bodies seem to love SR. So glad you’re sleeping well after a difficult start. I imagine it would be more difficult in some ways to have the other type of insomnia where you wake up too early. At least if we can’t fall asleep right away and have to get up and do SC, we’re just getting more and more tired, making it more likely that we can fall asleep. But to have slept for 3 or 4 hours and then wake up and have to get up – that would be difficult!
Gdsmom – Yes! – you can have sex in bed (or in the living room, kitchen table, whatever your fancy is) but then you need to get dressed (or not) and go somewhere besides the bedroom to stay awake until your sleep window starts. And NO – you do not start out trying to fall asleep outside of your sleep window. You stay awake until your sleep window starts and then go to bed for the first time.
Sorry you’re going through a difficult spell, Delv. Good that you’re confident that it will pass in time since you’ve had experience with this. Wishing you better sleep to come soon.
It started when my husband was out of town for a week and I got away from my routine, staying up late watching movies or playing the piano. My sleep started slipping and then I started to lose confidence, taking a big downward dip for the next week or so. I was shook up and contacted Martin about possibly getting back on the program. He reminded me that I’ve gotten back on track before, and I will again. That seemed to help and then sure enough, I started getting better.
About the Ambien, again I’m not so strict as Sasha and there are no things that I can’t “absolutely not” do. I just didn’t care at the moment and figured it would only be temporary, which it was. I took it 3 times and then got back on track.
So you’re making good progress. And it’s natural to feel a lot of anxiety when things don’t go well since you’ve had this so long. Maybe that’s why it’s a little easier for me to relax.
Yes, we will hope for you that this will be the last of bad weekends for a long time. The week or two before this past week was difficult for me too. I even ended up resorting to Ambien again when I couldn’t sleep for hours. Fortunately, I’m back on track again. Have slept through the night 5 nights in a row.
One thing to remind yourself too Mac, is that this is the first time in 2.5 years that you’ve really committed to SR and to not slacking off after a few weeks. So you’re going to get much better this time around, and also this time it will stick.
