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@masharey I appreciate your reply. I stopped looking for meditations and audiobooks because they made me anxious. I agree that meditation serves its purpose. There’s nothing other than TV that I’ve found yet. Even with that I put on Amazon prime because watching certain sitcom lineups makes me aware of the time and then I get anxious knowing that. Then I get the urge to check the time. I slept really well the night before last and last night I got no sleep. I just have to keep moving forward and get back into the course.
What audiobook are you streaming? I tried the Wizard of Oz last night on YouTube and it wasn’t helpful. I turned it off and tried another meditation/soothing sound. I finally gave up and turned them all off and fell asleep around 6 AM.
I could deal with the knot by letting it be and not pushing it away because the body always calms down. I can accept it and be curious about it?
I tried meditating but it doesn’t work at night for me. So I have to find something enjoyable to do. I have a part time job and growing my online business so that keeps me busy.
Changes are needed if I want to change. That means I have to stick to my normal schedule in the morning no matter how poor I’ve slept the night before. I am definitely ready for change as I want my sleep patterns to return to normal.
I agree that relaxation is a practice. And I think relaxation is the absence of the anxious feeling in my stomach. I’m pretty relaxed but that knot is still there and the knot keeps me up all night. I know I’m not alone with insomnia but I think most people manage to fall asleep for a few hours.
I respond to the fear of not being able to fall asleep when my window comes by falling asleep before it comes if I can.
I don’t like lounging on the couch after a bad night because I’m off my usual schedule and start my day late. Sometimes I stay in my PJs until the afternoon.
Accepting anxious thoughts means that the feelings would subside and not keep recurring over and over. It would feel like a freeing feeling in my brain and I’d be able to fall asleep.
It’s the wrong attitude because I need to keep doing the things I want in life in spite of insomnia. Pulling back would give it power.
Hi Martin.
My goal with the Awake Exercise was to acknowledge the thoughts and anxiety when they appeared so that I could eventually fall asleep. My problem is that when that anxiety starts in my stomach, it never settles and I end up staying up all night. On my bad nights I used to be able to fall asleep at 3, 4, 5, even 6 in the morning. And I would be happy because some sleep is better than none. Even after starting the program I am spending too many nights awake. I had insomnia before but I was able to get back to normal. It’s as if my sleep is getting worse. My goal is to improve my sleep naturally, not let this consume me, and to end consecutive nights of zero sleep.
Hi Leo.
What herbal medicine are you trying? I take Ashwaghanda, magnesium Glycinate but it’s not working right now. It works when I sleep well. I’m considering calling my doctor for some anti anxiety meds and I’ve been prescription meds free for 6 years.
Hi Hiker. Sometimes it does feel like I’ll never completely get out even though I’ve gotten out before. What I need to do is accept that there will be good nights and there will be bad nights. My problem is when I have a bad night, I start going down the rabbit hole of worry again even though I have the tools. I understand we can’t control sleep. I have to work on my reaction because a night of missed sleep sends me into hyper arousal and obsessive thoughts. Although I did have a bad night in August and it didn’t send me down the rabbit hole. As soon as I learn that every night is different and I shouldn’t freak out over one night, I’ll be good. I’ve had it on and off since 2018. Before that I was a great sleeper even with anxiety. Week 3 is open for me but I have to do the good things journal before I move on. I did it for one night. Again thank you for your reply.
I am in the thick of it too. I’ve been trying to remain positive but when I sit down I’m tired but wired. Just trying to accept the anxiety. I’ve tricked my brain too as I’ve been here before and have gotten through it. So there’s no reason why I can’t get through it again. And I do believe that sleep will win in the end. I will persevere. Sending you good vibes as well. I think I’m going to stop talking about it and give it less attention like you said but it’s difficult. I want to move away from this and I will. Give my attention to the things that matter.
I can relate to this post. It does get better. I had 6 nights of some to decent sleep. I missed one night and now I have anxiety about it again. I have to remember that it’s not linear and that I am not alone. I will keep working through the course and staying positive. I have the problem solving brain too. Maybe if we never tried to solve it to begin with, we’d be okay because sleep can’t be controlled. My rational mind knows this. I have to keep practicing. You are not alone.
