How Rachel got out of the insomnia struggle by being more flexible, more accepting, and more present (#55)

Podcast cover art with photo of Insomnia Coach Martin Reed

Rachel’s battle with insomnia began in grad school. Sleep aids and strict routines failed to improve her sleep.

Real change came when she moved away from trying to create the perfect conditions for sleep and stopped trying to get rid of certain thoughts and feelings.

Rachel’s new approach involved being more flexible. She abandoned sleep-related rules and rituals. She practiced building skill in self-kindness and being more present. She opened up and made space for difficult thoughts and feelings to exist.

This new approach not only improved her sleep, it also improved her overall quality of life.

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How Jessica broke free from insomnia by letting go and accepting it without judgement (#54)

Jessica smiling at the camera talking about insomnia acceptance and non-judgement

Jessica’s struggle with insomnia began on a family trip, and it worsened each time she traveled until it stuck around, even at home. No matter what she tried, her nights were filled with anxiety and struggle.

Jessica found that her resistance to insomnia and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it were making things even more difficult. So, she changed her approach. She practiced accepting insomnia and anxiety. She learned to be kinder to herself.

With ongoing practice, Jessica freed herself from an ongoing struggle and reclaimed her life from insomnia.

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How Eric got his life back from insomnia by focusing on what he could control (#53)

Eric smiling at the camera talking about getting his life back from insomnia

Eric’s battle with insomnia started after a middle-of-the-night panic attack turned sleep into a nightly struggle. In a desperate search for solutions, he made changes that didn’t improve his sleep and only ended up pulling him further away from the life he wanted to live. Eric started to isolate himself and considered difficult nights to be a personal failure.

The turning point came when Eric shifted his focus. Instead of obsessing over sleep and the difficult thoughts and feelings he was experiencing, he began to prioritize meaningful actions and experiences. He embraced anxiety as an essential component of a fulfilling life, rather than a nemesis to be defeated.

Today, Eric’s life is no longer ruled by insomnia. By refocusing on what he could control — his actions — he disarmed the power of sleepless nights and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with them. Eric didn’t just reclaim sleep; he reclaimed his life.

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How Gerry used mindfulness and self-kindness to move away from an endless struggle with insomnia (#52)

Gerry smiling at the camera talking about mindfulness for insomnia

Gerry’s decades-long struggle with insomnia felt like a never-ending battle. The more he tried to force sleep, the worse his insomnia became.

His turning point came when he shifted his approach, embracing mindfulness and self-kindness instead of engaging in an ongoing battle. By focusing on the present moment and practicing self-compassion, Gerry found a new, more effective way to approach sleep.

The result was transformative: not only did his sleep improve, but his overall quality of life also took a turn for the better. This episode dives deep into Gerry’s journey and the specific techniques that led to his transformation. Gerry’s experience shows that no matter how long you might struggle with insomnia, it’s still possible to break free from the insomnia cycle.

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How Anne-Claire moved away from the insomnia struggle by practicing new habits and being more willing to experience insomnia (#51)

Anne-Claire facing the camera talking about how to be willing to experience insomnia

Anne-Claire experienced sleep issues when she overextended herself running her business. After reducing her workload her sleep didn’t get any better. Supplements and medication didn’t seem to help. This led her to explore a new approach.

Anne-Claire implemented new habits that would help create better conditions for sleep and help starve insomnia of the oxygen it needed to survive. And, instead of trying to fight or avoid difficult the thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, she began observing and even welcoming them.

As Anne-Claire put less effort into sleep and became more willing to experience insomnia, things improved. Wakefulness and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it started to lose their power and influence and sleep — once again — became effortless.

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How Jessy separated herself from her thoughts, moved away from medication, and transformed her relationship with sleep (#50)

Jessy smiling at camera talking about separating herself from her thoughts about sleep

Jessy experienced sleep disruption due to the stress of COVID and the breakup of her community. Initially, she found it difficult to fall asleep. Then she started waking during the night and found it hard to get back to sleep.

As her sleep got progressively worse, Jessy started to feel scared and worried that she was losing control of her life.

She tried medication but it didn’t help. She felt desperate and alone.

After finding the Insomnia Coach podcast, she found hope in the stories of others. That encouraged her to start taking her life back from insomnia, even while it was still present. She did more of what mattered. She stopped trying to control sleep. She moved away from struggling with her thoughts and feelings (and as she did that she found that her mind could be an unreliable narrator).

Today, Jessy considers her sleep to be normal and she feels that her experience with insomnia gave her the opportunity to recognize her own resilience and that gave her the confidence to move forward in life.

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How Maria faced the fear of insomnia by allowing it to exist and discovered that all its power came from how she responded to it (#49)

Maria smiling at the camera as she talking about facing the fear of insomnia

After experiencing anxiety and panic attacks and not sleeping for 72 hours, Maria thought she had lost the ability to sleep. Medication wasn’t working. She withdrew from life. She couldn’t focus on anything other than sleep.

Feeling completely stuck, Maria changed her approach. Instead of trying to fight or avoid insomnia, she allowed it to show up whenever it chose. Instead of trying to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, she allowed them to come and go as they pleased.

Maria also started to do more of the things that mattered to her, even when insomnia was present and even when her mind was telling her she couldn’t leave the house. All these actions stripped insomnia of its power and influence and allowed Maria to redirect her energy and attention away from an ongoing struggle and toward living the life she wanted to live.

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How Leah freed herself from the insomnia struggle by abandoning her efforts to control sleep (#48)

Leah smiling as she talks about moving away from putting effort into sleep

Leah experienced insomnia from her teenage years. As an adult it would often come and go, until it came and didn’t go! This made it difficult for Leah to live the life she wanted to live. To do the things that mattered to her. Sleeping pills didn’t help, and she felt stuck.

So, Leah decided to change her approach. She realized that canceling plans after sleepless nights didn’t make things any better and so she committed to following through on her plans, regardless of how she felt. Instead of putting effort into sleep, she gave her body the opportunity to take care of sleep all by itself. She also practiced observing her thoughts instead of trying to control them.

By doing things that mattered to her, Leah freed herself from the insomnia struggle. Now, sleep feels more natural and she is living the life she wants to live, independently of sleep.

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How Amanda reclaimed her life from insomnia and abandoned all the rules and rituals that were making things more difficult (#47)

Amanda smiling and talking about how she reclaimed her life from insomnia

Amanda’s insomnia was triggered by a number of stressors — having a baby, relocating, getting a new job, and dealing with a toxic parent.

She tried several sleep aids and implemented a number of sleep rules and rituals but found no real relief until she explored a different approach.

She started to acknowledge and accept her thoughts and feelings instead of trying to control them. She started to get more comfortable with nighttime wakefulness. And, she started to focus on the good things in her life and doing things that mattered to her.

As a result, she was able to move away from chasing after sleep and successfully reclaimed her life from insomnia.

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How Eddie got through the ups and downs of insomnia by implementing a plan that stopped it from controlling his life (#46)

Eddie smiling at the camera in front of a chalkboard

For more than a decade, Eddie struggled with sleep. He had good nights and bad nights, and just when he thought his sleep was back on track, it would slip away again. The harder it became to sleep, the more he struggled, and the less he did the things he loved.

Eddie’s transformation started when he stopped trying to force sleep and began developing healthy sleep habits. He also took the time to figure out what insomnia was preventing him from doing and what it was taking away from him. Despite restless nights, he made a commitment to do what mattered most to him.

Now, Eddie sees his battle with insomnia as a source of strength. He’s not happy about his experience, but he’s not sad either. Instead, he’s grateful for what he’s learned and the resilience he’s gained.

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