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Celebrating 25 nights of sleeping off of restoril 🙂 I the anxiety about sleep had also lessened significantly. While the thought pops up throughout the day and there’s often moments before sleep when they come up, it’s getting easier to hold space for those thoughts and say this is not an insight or premonition but my mind’s way of trying to protect me, thanks mind.
The quality of my sleep has gone up significantly with less and less nights of fragmented sleep. I’m beginning to average around 5 solid hours instead of 4.5 hours which at the beginning was generally what I was getting after the taper. However I never can stay asleep until my 5:30 am wake-up and my cbti provider wants me to get up 3 times every 15 minutes if I can’t fall back asleep.
For me it feels more frustrating and never works. When I wake up around 4:15-:4:45 just knowing I only have about an hour left and doing the every 15 minutes thing I think really stresses me out. I’d rather just rest in bed until 5. I wake up at 4:30 feeling so triumphant and could prob start my day hoping it builds more sleep drive later but then feel obligated to try for longer and then frustrated I can’t get an extra hour in (but I always go back to celebrating what I did get). What sometimes ends up happening is once my alarm goes off at 5:30 I go to the couch and turn it off and the doze off for 30 minutes like l can finally relax knowing the alarm is over. I’m thinking of just making my sleep window 5 and w less pressure hoping I end up over sleeping till that 5:30 window.
My real question is though, for any of you who have recovered, did your sleep solidify before you were able to sleep longer? Like I am content w an average or 5 hours at the moment. The experience of solid sleep is priceless. but I am still hoping my body will naturally get some longer hours down the line but I know I can’t force this.
I’ve heard the quality comes before your body starts allowing for me quantity and I’m just wondering if that has been true for any of you?
In due course, the answers to any questions you have now will be defunct because the questions themselves have become irrelevant and obsolete.
I encourage you to experience insomnia as a complete set. Embrace the good and the bad. Reserve any questions and judgments until later. Because when reading your post, what I am sensing is this rush to find fast answers and a frenzy to find a quick cure and exit. Don’t do this. Be patient. Good luck and best wishes.
As you celebrate remaining committed to actions that matter to you, you are also opening up to the presence of thoughts and feelings — recognizing that they come from your brain doing its job of looking out for you. That means you’ve successfully withdrawn from one potential battleground!
Your experience seems to tell you that the more you try to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen, the more likely you are to struggle with sleep. The more difficult it becomes.
Sleep happens (and happens best) when it is effortless. For as long as there is a pursuit of a certain amount or type of sleep to happen, conditions are ripe for an ongoing struggle!
Sleep doesn’t need rules to happen. It just needs us to get out of its way 😉
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
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