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He's had over fifty
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Time for a recap:
An overview of the story so far:
PART ONE
Quote:The bus was late and the dog was already taking a poop right on the damn I nearly passed out but I managed to beat up a shark the one that ate my dear dead dog. It all happened so quickly, I couldn't even save my own toe!Blasted shark, I started to run away from it, but a luminous blowfish suddenly came from the sewer and started flailing on the ground so I went over and tickled it silly but all it did was pee on my atomic particle generator, which proceeded to spit fire towards the sky, when I got a call from my bank manager to say my account was now frozen because the atomic particle generator gave it a cold and so I asked where do I go if I want to unfreeze the account and he then told me to go back to the bus stop, but suddenly I found myself staring at the big alien craft that must have popped up from deep within the ocean and I suddenly forgot why I was standing completely naked apart from all the non-naked chickens pecking on the sliding glass door of my biomechanical leg replacement.
They broke the mechanism by improperly attempting to ratchet with a wrench when what was needed was a good strong fireman to tweak the mechanism and remove the rogue chicken, which had crawled in there and was deviously planning to disable my main component so I killed it.
As it lay twitching I learned that it was actually a hyena dressed up in a pink tuxedo and yellow shoes, and I thought I really need to get those shoes for my poodle who can't dance without yellow heels because the color yellow gives him wings like red bull commercials, true story.
There's a video on youtube, and it has already had over 3 million views! My friend thought that it was going to flop just like the time at the pool in that trendy L.A. hotel when that vain lifeguard was flexing his guns def. locked and loaded until the lesbian beat a “try” sexual at shed feathers all over my professionally cleaned carpet which made me sad.
PART TWO
Quote:So anyway, back at the swanky hotel bar near the bus stop I was still trying to unfreeze the account that my Bacardi Mojitos spilled on. They reopened the bank, which had I thought, the jewels but little did I know that someone had replaced them with those scary little kewpie dolls!My thoughts went wild because I couldn't even grasp why they existed and so I asked the strange looking lady but she ran screaming I panicked when I heard the police siren and threw the doll out of the window. Then the firemen came and started to kiss the jewels! Where were they going to take the strange looking giraffe which appeared out of place near 5th and 6th street, it craned its neck looking directly at the tiny man trying to bathe In the muddy puddle trying not to splash mud onto the old Bentley that was parked on its roof by the bus stop where the giraffe was trying to figure out when to stick his neck into the coffee shop to use wi-fi to google his friend the map of the outer 5th sector near the rings of Saturn in the galaxy Flarfignhim because their ribs are awesome!
However due to technical issues, the ribs were still stuck to the grill thanks to the chef using the wrong utensil that instead was a comb for my nostril hair that curled and gave great volume to the sensitive cells in my cerebral coretx, although that was negated by my neuro pllastic brain which I got free in a cereal box.
PART THREE
Quote:I couldn't help but think how I got into this situation when I started to spin the LP backwards to 1999. Suddenly I remembered I left my bag in the bag shop behind the red fur I felt relieved, but I couldn't find it even though i was about to be caught knee deep in furs. I decided then that id lost all control, but who cares when partying like 1989 and making out in the car. “I must tell you” I said, as she stood on her hands “remember those feral pigeons..?”She looked at me but it was too late, the pigeons attacked before I could finish my triple decker cheese double down burger with fries in the side cut me up, I was thinking how to get hold of my senses before the burger was eaten by the pigeon with the fake beard.
Then I noticed the glittering necklace in the glove compartment of the bus terminal near the bank at high tide, visible only when you stepped close and I suddenly remembered taking off my clothes and there it was the ever so precious sparkling, shiny jewel of – splash I went as I dove through the vast depths of outer space and beyond to a parallel dimension where everything was just not in working order.
A jelly like goo coated the underside of my once treasured PC. My new iMac was calling to me ever so sadly in that pathetic voice of Dr. Elmer Fudd, MD during surgery to enlarge my unusually enlarged micro sciacanthus which had been inactive for some time – so long in fact, the sciacanthus had dried up prompting Elmer to say “I'm sowwy Mr Wabbit, there's no cure for insomnia. But then again your brain is uniquely adapted to handle the pressure emanating from behind those tired eyes so in future any bouts of insomnia will be terminal. Therefore it's essential that you ask before you sail into the cold night, remember how awful it is to lie awake beside someone who sleeps soundly because all you can think about is how you wish that you could kill them, but you know deep down you just want to hold them tight enough and follow them into the dark depths of…”
Then it sang YMCA and all I could do was sing along because the words are catchy and I wanted to be a happy little insomniac before I run down to the lighthouse at the far end of the winding road downhill towards the magical green ogre who dances the night away every time he gets close to falling asleep which is only if he's had over fifty nights with no sleep.
Continuing on….
So I asked the
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
do what I always
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
night and dance with
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
with that green ogre
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
and rainbow shoes that
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
a constant supply of
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
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