I found Martin's latest email particularly interesting — the one regarding undiagnosed abnormal breathing patterns being a possible cause for failure to maintain sleep.
I know I don't have sleep apnea, but I always kinda wondered if breathing was at the root of my problem. My insomnia set on very suddenly, in fall 2009. Prior to that, I had had no problems sleeping for 33 years.
Of course I have wracked my brains, going back to figure out what I was doing in fall '09 that might have precipitated this. And one thought I had at the time was breathing related!!
I had just started working as a model for this weird medical fetish website (divinelyssa.com…that's me, LOL) where we were told to hold our breath as long as possible, while hooked up to an EKG and a heart rate monitoring device (don't ask….apparently some weirdos get off on that).
I was able to comfortably hold my breath for about 2 minutes, but the guy who runs the site would make snarky comments and try to push me into holding it longer. His “top” models, he told me, were able to hold their breath for upwards of 4 minutes — some to the point of passing out!! If I could pass out, he told me, I'd make much more money..and he assured me there were no risks to doing so, as I would immediately come to afterward, before any brain damage could be done.
WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Needless to say, I found that CREEPY in the extreme, and even I had been able to, I would not have forced myself to pass out for the sake of some pervert!!! Still, the peer pressure got to me, and I ended up holding my breath up to 4min 20sec….right to the brink of passing out, where I got lightheaded and weird.
I *distinctly* remember going home that night and feeling “afraid” to lose consciousness — as if in doing so, I would somehow forget to breathe, and would suffocate in my sleep.
However, the insomnia went away for a few months after that. My sleep went back to normal — and I continued shooting for that creepy site for months. Then in March 2010, the insomnia returned in full force — and has been my constant companion ever since.
I haven't done any breath-holding videos for a year or two now, but I still can't maintain sleep. I **wonder** if this breathing stuff has anything to do with it!!!
I guess the only way to find out would be to get a sleep test…but my shitty insurance won't cover it, so I better start saving up :-/
Arrrrrrrrrrrgh!