[Lisa33]

I am new to this forum. I am going on about 3-4 weeks of terrible insomnia and lack of sleep. I just can’t fall asleep. I had one good night, last night where I slept through the night without taking Xanax. Other than that, if I want any sleep, I have to take half a Xanax. I hate having to rely on a pill. I am in a terrible cycle of anxiety from not sleeping causing me not to sleep. I have been listening to the podcasts and you tube channel, which makes me feel like I’m not alone. There is very good advice and tips, but of course it’s all easier said than done. Any feedback is welcome.

[hiker]

Hi Lisa33, oh man, is it tough or what…….maybe especially for people who try hard at something and generally succeed. I could be way off here, but for some reason I think you fit in this category?

Anyway, trying to sleep is one of those things where trying harder doesn’t work. As for sleep aids, you already know that pills are not the long term solution. (You might want to check with a pharmacist, but I am fairly certain Xanax is for short term use for panic attacks.)

I am guessing you have heard the advice about observing your thoughts instead of living in them. And it is absolutely easier said than done. So how to do it? I think it comes down to a practice routine, and here I am talking about mindfulness, which is a current fad–and also a way to approach our thoughts that has been around for about 3,000 years. You can read about it, watch videos about it, talk about it…..but it comes down to doing it. And no, it is not a cure-all, and sometimes you think you will never get anywhere. (For me, it is analogous to learning guitar, but pick whatever analogy applies for you…. another might be actually physically exercising instead of just talking about it….) Suggest palousemindfulness.com or mindfulness northwest.com as examples of free websites. Lots of avenues, some will resonate, others not so much.

I think Martin’s cognitive behavior therapy course is a good regimen if you find that a set schedule of exercises might be the way to stay motivated.

I don’t understand how all this stuff works, but there are reputable studies which show physiological changes to the brain which can lead, among other things, to better sleep. I thought it sounded kind of out there, but eventually I started wishing I had heard about all this years ago, after struggling and trying so hard to sleep.

I hope you stay with this website to keep reminding yourself that you indeed are not alone. Nothing like chronic insomnia to get so scrambled you can’t think straight. This is especially the time not to take your thoughts too seriously, they can really get whacky.

Take care, you are not condemned to a lifetime of insomnia.

[Lisa33]

Thank you so much for your reply. I really appreciate it. I do feel that mindfulness helps a lot. I actually had decent sleep for a string of nights without taking Xanax, but here I am up awake with a bad night. Trying not to let it get to me, and just accept it. I did have a very high anxiety day, which I’m sure has to do with the set back. The Covid surge with gathering for Christmas is really adding to my worry, as we lost a parent to Covid earlier this year. This holiday season is hard as we are still grieving. I think I need to calm my mind for sure, and the sleep will come again.

[Scott]

Lisa,

Hopefully, the night you achieved great sleep, reassured you that you have the ability to sleep without medication since pills don’t actually generate sleep. Since you’ve been listening to Martin’s YouTube videos, podcasts and possibly reading the CBT-I information on this website, have you begun implementing any of the techniques yet? Since you’re having difficulty falling asleep, have you considered using a sleep restriction window to assist you in creating a strong sleep drive that is able to override sleep-related arousal close to bedtime?

Scott J

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[Author]

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