[SSGib]

Any advice on what to do when I wake at 3am? I do get out of bed and read after staying in bed for 20 mins. I read but I’m wide awake and don’t tend to ever get sleepy again. I can get sleepy again and fall back asleep if I lay down on the couch. But getting out of bed and then being able to get sleepy and go back to sleep in bed never works.

[Martin Reed]

Welcome to the forum! I think it might be helpful to clarify that the goal of getting out of bed during the night isn’t to make sleep happen (although that might be a bonus side effect) because sleep cannot be controlled.

Instead, the goal is to get out of bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good so we have a more pleasant alternative to being in bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good. We also prevent ourselves from reinforcing a negative association between the bed and unpleasant wakefulness.

So, with this in mind, it might be helpful to allow yourself to remain in bed when you wake for as long as being in bed feels good. No need to monitor for 20-minute chunks of time — just use how you feel as your guide! If being in bed doesn’t feel good, that can be a good time to get out of bed and do anything more enjoyable until you feel conditions are right for sleep.

I hope this helps!

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