[Ines_I]

Hi there!
I was wondering if someone could give me some kind of advice with an issue I’m facing recently.
Since I’ve been into Martin’s videos, I’ve learned a lot and now I’m sure of my natural hability to sleep. I’ve even experienced some good nights here and there, which is a very good step. But now I’ve realized that I’m scared of me being afraid, worried or overthinking, because I know that hyperarousal and anxiety can actually make me being awake all night long. I’m afraid of my thinking process and reactions to them (anxiety mostly), even though I know that I would sleep if it wasn’t because of my fears? Even though I know that I’m capable of that?
Does it make any sense what I’m saying?
Is there any advice for me to follow since I’m feeling stuck and kind of scared of myself?
Thank you so much in advance!

[Manfred]

Yes, Ines, I can very much relate to this. I reguarly struggle with this too. It is “nothing more” than sleep anxiety and/or intrusive thoughts.

I think I can recommend very good things:

1. “The DARE Approach” (book, app, even 1:1 counselling)
http://www.dareresponse.com

2. “The Sleep Book” and the app “The Sleep School”

3. Daniel Erichsen’s “The Sleep Coach School”. Start on Youtube with “tons” of great videos. He offers also coaching programms (video and group coaching) and he has a new APP “BedTyme” with 1:1 coaching. He has published also books, his recent is “Set and Forget it”.

4. if u struggle with intrusive thoughts, I can recommend the book “Overcoming unwanted intrusive thoughts” by S. Winston and M. Seif

5. The book (and online course): “Stopping the Noise in Your Head” by Reid WIlson

These are excellent ressouces that go in the exact same direction.

Let me know if u need further advice.

Good luck!

Manfred

[Chee2308]

Hi Ines,

What you are experiencing is very normal as I went through it myself during my recovery journey. If you have been sleeping well and then develop anxiety and worry over whether it will continue, it’s called performance anxiety and is completely normal. What is also normal is taking longer to fall asleep because that means you are sleeping well and not being sleep deprived. So celebrate these moments of victories instead of worrying about future sleep over which you have absolutely no control over and still hasn’t yet happened anyway. Tell yourself you will deal with it when it ACTUALLY happens not before. Every time your mind presents you with a thought of developing insomnia or poor sleep again, accept it as just a thought in the same way as having non-sleep related thoughts and thoughts really have no bearing over your ability to sleep and your sleep drive. Instead challenge it by daring it to make you sleepless again and/or proving you can still sleep despite being worried; this fear will slowly melt away. Continue practicing good sleep hygienes such as sleeping and waking at the same time each day, filling your day with enjoyable activities, not prioritizing sleep over personal enjoyment/development and paying no particular attention to how you slept for a particular night. You are going to spend at least a third of your lifetime sleeping so having couple of poor nights here and there is really insignificant. 2 bad nights over 365 nights is really nothing to worry about and everyone gets them. Remember you are here to enjoy what your life has to offer so do absolutely just that. Why fret over sleep if your purpose is to achieve joy and fulfillment in life? Accept that sleep is something your body will take care of all by itself, just like breathing while you set out to achieve what you want to achieve. Hope this helps you and good luck!

[Ines_I]

Thank you so much for your feedback! Going to try to keep improving and learning with all the resources and advices!

[Chee2308]

To understand more about sleep, I highly recommend you view this sleep coach’s podcast when he compares sleeping and eating.

That is a very a good analogy of sleep. Basically, anyone can sleep every single time as long as they have stayed awake long enough, in the same way hunger builds the longer you refrain from eating. Absolutely no mystery there! It is just a biological process that happens with accumulation and depletion, same way as draining and recharging your smart phone batteries every time you use it.

[Martin Reed]

Have you been able to identify any of the thoughts that seem to generate an anxious response? That can sometimes be a good place to start when it comes to tackling sleep-related anxiety.

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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