[Rubylight]

I’m in my second week of implementing sleep compression, as the first time I tried CBT-I using strict sleep restriction I had to give up; the process was just too hard and I seemed to be going backwards instead of forward. Now I’m finding myself in the same boat again, my sleep diary registering ever more dismal results. Here I am once again at 3:30 in the morning after a mere hour of sleep, and feeling that old discouragement creep in again, after I was so determined not to let it get me this time around. Is this normal? Will it ever end?????

[patricklp1]

I’m there with you. I’m only in the second week of the course, but after promising early results it feels like I’m moving backwards. My problem is getting to sleep. I can be dead tired, dozing off in front of the tv, but when I go to bed I’m suddenly wide awake, restless, and frustrated. And that’s when all of Martin’s good advice goes right out the window. Frustration leads to desperation. I don’t know how to move from sleepiness to sleep.

[Rubylight]

Wow, it sounds like we’re the same person. That’s EXACTLY how it is for me. Every single detail. I find it’s so easy to be brave and tough if I’ve had a reasonably good night or two, but when there are several rotten nights in a row, it’s so hard to stay the course. I still want to cry and yell like I used to, but so far I’ve stayed relatively calm, with great effort! Results are just not coming yet. But it’s a comfort to know there’s someone just like me out there.

[patricklp1]

This morning I rewatched part of Week 2, where Martin really stresses the importance of the AWAKE exercise (of which I admit I was skeptical). I will resolve to give it a go. It is good to know there’s someone out there facing the same challenge. Wishing you the best.

[Rubylight]

Thanks! And…what is the AWAKE exercise? Is that the thing where you try to keep your eyes open, where you try to stay awake instead of trying to sleep?

[Martin Reed]

Hello Rubylight!

That discouragement is natural and normal — it’s your brain doing its job and looking out for you!

What’s your goal with sleep compression, and how are you implementing it? Are you finding that keeping a sleep diary is helping you shift attention away from sleep (something that you cannot directly control anyway) or is it perhaps making sleep more of a focus of your attention, at the expense of all the other stuff that’s also present in your life?

For as long as our goal is to make sleep happen, get rid of wakefulness when it shows up, or to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that can come with insomnia, we are setting ourselves up for a struggle (which can make everything more difficult) since we cannot directly or permanently control any of that stuff (as you likely know from your own experience).

The goal with a sleep window (whether you are implementing sleep restriction or sleep compression) is to help you move away from chasing after sleep — because the more we try to make sleep happen, the more difficult it usually becomes. It’s not something that can make sleep happen since sleep cannot be controlled.

In short, we cannot control sleep and we cannot permanently get rid of wakefulness or difficult thoughts and feelings. For as long as we try, we’ll likely struggle. What we can control is our response to this difficult stuff — and our response can make things more difficult (by adding struggle on top), or it can help us move away from the endless and exhausting struggle so we can use our energy and attention in a way that will help us do more of what matters.

The AWAKE exercise is something I share in my online course as a way of moving away from struggling with nighttime wakefulness and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it.

I hope there’s something helpful here.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Rubylight]

I’m in the second week of doing sleep compression, and have almost arrived at my five and a half hour window. Staying up till midnight is already so difficult, night after night, but even worse are the days, because I absolutely cannot stay awake…nodding off uncontrollably, twenty, thirty times in a row. It also happens in the evening while I’m waiting out the time till midnight. But once in bed, its Hello! Wide awake! Could the cumulative effect of all these nod-offs be what is preventing me from having any discernible success yet? How do other people deal with this?

[Martin Reed]

If you are falling asleep without warning during the day (especially if this happens at times when you need to be awake) I would encourage you to discuss that with your doctor.

What might be happening is that before your sleep window begins, there’s no effort to make sleep happen — and perhaps you aren’t putting any pressure on yourself to sleep. As a result, you experience a strong sense of sleepiness (and are also more likely to experience sleep). Perhaps there might be a useful insight in that experience?

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Rubylight]

Yes, that IS an insight. I know I don’t have narcolepsy or anything like that…it’s just that I am so sleep deprived that my brain seems to be taking every opportunity to get me to sleep, knowing I need it, and since there are no restrictions in place during the day or early evening, I’ll go out like a light with no prompting…which should prove to me that my body certainly DOES know how to sleep perfectly well, and nothing is broken! But when the sleep window opens and then I HAVE to sleep, all hell breaks lose and I lose all my so-called powers. Especially if I’m embarking on the third totally sleepless night in a row. Two I can do; three are too much for me.

[Author]

Posts