[leogeo]

Helllo,

I am 46 year old recently divorced man who has gone through hell. Without going to to much detail which includes painful surgeries, prescription dependency to klonopin, 1.5 year divorce what I am left with is chronic insmonia that started three years ago. I believe i had a nervous breakdown as I shake and tremble when i sleep. My nervous system is shot. I sleep on average 3 hours a night for last three years. I have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep. The insomhia has crippled me.

Every day I think well it has to get better it just has to. But it has been 3 yrs 2 months and now it is like a race to see if i can get better before all the wheels come off in my life. I currently take just natural stuff like magnesium, melatonin, dhea. I am in the process of stopping taking trazedone and unisom.

What is scary is that I have dark thoughts about ending my life when i get so sleep deprived. I have two children and it makes me sick that those thoughts come into my mind but they do. I know all of my problems I can work through if I can just sleep. It is like a vicious cycle that wont end.

I guess i was looking for a little support.

Thanks

[Martin Reed]

Hi Leo

First, let me say that you are not alone. We are a community of insomniacs, so you no longer have to feel isolated or alone. Many of us here are (or have been) in a similar situation to you. You are amongst friends. If you ever have thoughts about ending your own life, please don't bury them. Speak to your doctor or call 911.

Take a look around the forums and feel free to get involved in any discussions you like, no matter how old. Similarly, feel free to start your own discussion topic if there is anything specific you want to discuss that you don't already see covered.

I look forward to getting to know you and hope that Insomnia Land helps you cope with your insomnia, and perhaps even helps you get some sleep.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[dutchsailor]

Hi Leo,

It sounds like you are still going through real difficult times.

Insomenia and feeling depressed can have mutual effects, creating the famous vicious circle.

I know it is hard to do, but in my experience it is best to give up resistance against not sleeping; try to kind of accept the situation and find ways to work around it (which does not imply to give up working on improvement).

What helped me survive my ongoing insomnia was, to learn how to meditate or do autogenic training. At night it can help relax your body and put your mind at rest. During the day it can help to get new energy, even after a poor night of sleep.

I guess you have been seeking professional help to improve the mental state?

In any case, if you feel bad at night, try to realise that the 'dark hours' tend to make things look worse than they are; that things will look less gloomy once the next day is there.

Fred

[leogeo]

Thanks guys,

I appreciate you input and support. I am not seeing a medical professional any more. I saw a sleep psychiatrist and he messed me up more. He prescribed 1 mg klonopin then upped it to 1.5 mg. I became addicted and when I tried to withdraw had a heck of a time. Turns out 1 mg was 4 times the starting dose and then became six times the starting dose. It took me 1.5 years to come off of it. Last night I caved at 6 am I took an ambien so i could get at least 3 hours. I hate taking Ambien because of the rebound insomnia. But sleep deprivation is a powerful force and when I get desperate enough i cave.

[Martin Reed]

Hi Leo

Take a look around the forums and you'll see there are others in similar situations to yours struggling with sleep. You may want to take a look at the thread on Xanax, which is a similar drug to klonopin: http://www.insomnialand.com/topic/375-xanax/

We also have a thread about insomnia medications in general: http://www.insomnialand.com/topic/103-insomnia-medications/

Keep in touch.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[leogeo]

Thanks Martin,

I am going to cold turkey the ambien as of tonight. I have been up for two nights and fully expect to be up 4 more or so when I stop the ambien. I am through with pills. I have been on so many and my conclusion is they just make it worse. Really been hard. Thanks for the support

[Martin Reed]

You've got unlimited support here at Insomnia Land, Leo.

Have you spoken with your doctor about coming off or reducing your sleeping medication?

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[leogeo]

Thanks Martin,

I do not trust my sleep psychiatrist. He started me off at 4 times the starting dose of klonopin and then upped it to 6 times. It took me a 1.5 years to get off that drug. I have done this before with ambien. Sleep is a powerful motivator to take these pills but they only make it worse imo. This week has been the roughest of any that I can remember.

How many hours do you get a night? How long have you suffered from this?

[Martin Reed]

I am lucky in that I am not a chronic insomniac – however, most of our members here are; as you will see from looking around the forums and reading the stories of others! Don't be hesitant to reach out to other members – either on existing discussion threads or via direct messages.

We're all here to help one another.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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