[Toneman]

I’ve been struggling with insomnia for the last couple of months. It arrived out of the blue, for no reason that I can pinpoint, and feels like it’s getting worse. Especially the anxiety of ‘will I or won’t I sleep tonight?’
Last night was a perfect example. I felt I was very tired going to bed, but could I get to sleep? Not a chance! So I followed my routine of taking a quarter of a Doxylamine pill at around 2am, going downstairs and laying on my couch until I fell asleep. Then on waking an hour or so later, going back to bed.
It works – but the morning hangovers are terrible. And I hate taking medication, but feel like my brain is associating NOT taking it with NOT sleeping.
It sounds great to accept. It makes sense to just lie there and accept that I might not sleep – and that’s OK – but how do you actually do it? Any type of mind exercises I’ve tried to get myself back to sleep are soon replaced with the thoughts of “I’m not going to get back to sleep again”.
I really need to find the genie in the bottle. I only have one wish – give me back my sleep.

[sleep]

I have been sleeping since April and it amazes me. But what worked for me was not fearing that I would not sleep. I say this at night, I will live life and if I cant go to sleep I will sleep later. I use to be afraid I would have a stroke or heart attack if I didnt sleep after going 3 nights without sleep one time. Obsessing on this kept me from sleeping. I now say I have had enough sleep or this may be a icky night that sucks but sleep will come back and it always does.

I went two years worrying about sleep and now I took my power back. If I have a bad night of sleep I have one but the next night or the next day I make up for it. Martin Reed said you will have bad days and bad nights, this is life. So far I have not had many bad nights. If something was bothering me I woke up a few times. I now know all that worrying about sleep is what was keeping me up. I know now I will sleep eventually. It is like breathing, something you just do naturally. But you cant control it. I just know it will come back and I will sleep. I watch the videos also which have helped.

[Toneman]

It’s great to hear people say things along the line of ‘If I sleep, that’s great.. if I don’t, then I’ll catch up the next day/night’. I feel like words are easy to say, putting in practice a lot more difficult.
I tried last night. I fell asleep almost immediately, and it lasted no longer than 10 – 30 minutes, before I was wide awake again. I felt almost refreshed compared to when I went to bed tired just a short time earlier. 3 hours later of trying to accept …and if I’ve been asleep, then it is only Stage 1 of sleep, as it just doesn’t feel like I’ve been there.
My mind is now setting a trap for me – medication will get me to sleep, and it does. But leaves me tired and hungover the next day.. or it’s the lack of sleep that leaves me that way.
I don’t have the luxury of a boss who understands my lack of output through lack of sleep. After numerous nights now of interrupted sleep, I’m scared to go to bed. Scared of another bad night of sleep. But mostly, I’m scared to invest in expensive programs, in the belief that it won’t fix me, I’m broken, and nothing can fix my sleep.

[Doze]

I use mindful sleep meditation and soothing sounds to sleep. There are plenty of free meditation and sleep sounds available. I Google mine.

[Martin Reed]

Welcome to the forum @Toneman!

Acceptance is far easier said than done, just as you said! It usually requires ongoing practice, too. And, if your goal with accepting you might not sleep is for sleep to happen, is that true acceptance?

As for how to switch your mind off on command, if you figure that one out let me know first and we can be trillionaires together 😉

Since the human brain is active and generating thoughts 24/7, it knows how to generate sleep no matter what you are thinking or feeling. So trying to switch off your mind might be a distraction that’s only consuming more energy and attention and making things even more difficult.

If that’s not the obstacle, what could be? Perhaps this question might help:

If you think back to when sleep wasn’t an issue or a concern, what were you doing back then to make sleep happen so effortlessly?

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[Author]

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