[Milko]

Hello there,

I read about all the things that could help to improve your sleep. I followed the checklist and do them all. shorter time in bed, getting out of bed when you can’t sleep, getting up at the same tome, etcetera. Still sleep is difficult on many nights. The arousal is too strong.
I hope someone hss probably experienced the same and can provide me some tips.
Thanks!!

[Chee2308]

Hello and welcome to this forum!

Unfortunately, sleep is one of those paradoxes in life where the more you do or try to control it, the worse it gets. Please don’t chase sleep or make it your ultimate goal. Just do the bare minimum, such as regular bedtimes and pretty good sleep hygiene (like a wind-down period and sleeping in a cool, dark, quiet environment). Leave the rest to your body. Try not to fret over it! Trust your body, it knows how to sleep. Nobody ever went to kindergarten to learn sleeping.

Depending on your personality and patience, it’s going to take some time for things to settle down. Be very patient and non-judgmental with yourself. The real cure isn’t sleep itself, it’s really your tolerance to poor sleep and how you react to it. The final stage of recovery is not missing sleep anymore. You automatically want to stay up more because it’s more fun that way and perhaps even feeling that sleep is a waste of time. Good luck.

[Milko]

Thanks. You’re right. I am in the ‘doing”- mode and that doesn’t help much. On the other hand I find it very tough and hard to put myself in an ‘accepting’-mode. On days like this one I simply feel so bad that I can’t stop myself thinking about solutions. Sleep restriction an stimulus control give me some confidence. At least I can ‘do’ something.

[Chee2308]

Hello

It tends to get better over time. As long as you’re on the right path and start adopting the right mindset.

Well, I think you already get the rough idea when you said ‘do’ in quotes. Which brings to mind some phrases I’ve come across that people here use to describe this stage of the recovery, such as “Act like you don’t care”, “Fake it till you make it”, or some people wrote down repeated affirmations like “I sleep great” which they claimed sound ridiculous at first but then suddenly the statement started to become self-fulfilling, to their disbelief and delight, or some who engage in mindfulness or meditation of some sort. I think the basic idea is the same. To keep yourself occupied with something other than sleep. To get the pressure off sleeping for a bit.

If I asked you, how did you learn to walk? You might go, “well it started with crawling, and then this and that, I was walking before I even knew it. It’s really kinda the same here. You really learnt to walk because you didn’t pressure yourself, weren’t bothered with the final outcome or which stage of the process you were in. That is achieving without caring! Good luck.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by Chee2308.

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