[Kacido]

Hey, everybody,
I’ve been struggling with insomnia for six months. It all started when I was studying for my state exams, and then I was struggling with my thesis. Since then, my life has been turned upside down.
All the stress was too much and I fell into a deep depression. During that time I developed bad habits and now I can’t shake them.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but I don’t have this feeling of not being tired, rather I lie down and as soon as I start to fall asleep, suddenly something happens: my leg/arm twitches, I feel like I can’t breathe, my teeth start to chatter, I feel something pressing in my throat… I immediately wake up and my pulse goes out. Is anyone here experiencing something similar? I’m really desperate. The biggest problem is the teeth, I have braces and it seems to me that the position of my teeth has changed. I’m constantly looking for the right position to place them in relation to each other. Both during the day and at night. My doctor says everything is fine, but I’m starting to doubt it. Do you think the insomnia could be caused by this or am I just doing it all in my head?
It’s very difficult to find a psychiatrist or therapist in my country. Everyone treats me like I’m hysterical. But I can’t sleep every other day. It’s very unpleasant.
My relationship with my boyfriend has changed, of course he is my support in these difficult times but I am afraid that if this continues I will lose him. I am 26 years old and I never thought I would ever sleep alone on the couch in the living room instead of sleeping in bed with my boyfriend. Not to mention I’m tired all the time and I don’t even think about sex.
I’m just at the beginning of my working career, but how long will I be able to do this before I completely run out of energy.
I can’t accept the fact that I’m going to live like this for the rest of my life, there are nights when I take it well and then there are nights when I think I can’t go on. If I didn’t have such amazing people around me, I’d probably have given up a long time ago. I’m afraid it’s driving me crazy, the more I close myself off about my problems I stop communicating because I don’t want to bother others.
Thank you all for your comments and sharing your experiences. And fingers crossed for everyone to get through this.

[Martin Reed]

That sounds really difficult, @Kacido.

If your doctor says everything is fine, it’s possible that all the difficult symptoms you described come from hyperarousal — your brain firing up into overdrive in an attempt to protect you from nighttime wakefulness.

Being awake at night can definitely be unpleasant — but it’s not a threat in the same way that a tiger stalking around your bedroom wanting to eat you is! And yet, when we’ve struggled with insomnia for a while, our brain can believe that it’s no different to a man-eating tiger. It thinks that it must be a real threat since we are trying so hard to fight or avoid it.

Where it’s so easy to get stuck is we can start to try even harder to make sleep happen. We can try even harder to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that can come with insomnia. This pulls us even deeper into a struggle that makes everything more difficult — it consumes more of our energy and attention and makes it harder to do things that matter and to live the life we want to live.

This is where an alternative approach can sometimes be helpful. An approach that involves building skill in experiencing wakefulness and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia with less struggle. When there’s less struggle, we are better able to do things that matter — and, as a bonus, we also create better conditions for sleep.

You might want to read this page on ACT for insomnia to see if there’s anything useful there. I hope this helps and I wish you all the best! You are not alone.

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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