[bikash]

Hello, I’m a 54 year old male in a South Asian country. I’ve been having sleep problems for almost 20 years . I can’t fall asleep properly. I’ve taken all sorts of medications and tried yoga too but it didn’t work. I fall asleep but get awake at at every hour or two. Last night I didn’t have sleep till around 4 or 5 at morning when I woke after 45 minutes. On average, I don’t even on average, fall asleep for 4 or 5 hours a night !

[hiker]

Hi bikash, I am a 69 year old male in the USA. I started having sleep problems about 40 years ago. It has continued for many years. I also tried all sorts of medications, yoga, and other things, with limited success.

If there was a method which guaranteed good sleep–a certain medication or whatever–you would see people lined up for miles/kilometers, waiting to get it. Unfortunately there isn’t.

This does not mean that all is hopeless. I encourage you to stay with this website.

You write that “I can’t fall asleep properly.” But I don’t think sleep is something we can acquire by doing it “properly” or working harder at it or getting more skilled at it.

To learn a new skill, like learning a musical instrument or how to build a house or repair a computer, we have to learn specific tasks, and then practice them repeatedly. Working hard, devoting our time, not giving up when things are difficult to learn will help us succeed in learning this new skill.

But sleep is not like this. It is more like a natural condition which simply comes to us. I think we have trouble with sleep when we try to grab it and keep it and dominate it, almost like trying to grab the wind.

This might sound weird, but I also have dealt with insomnia for a long time. And I am convinced that working harder is not the answer. Again, I encourage you to stay with this website. Martin will not give you a magic formula because there isn’t one, but he has good advice on changing our perceptions about sleep.

[Martin Reed]

Welcome to the forum, bikash — and thank you, hiker, for the encouragement and support you offered!

It’s not too surprising that you didn’t find medication or yoga worked, bikash — that’s because medication or yoga cannot generate sleep! The only thing that can generate sleep is your own biological sleep drive — and sleep drive is generated through wakefulness.

In other words, when we have been awake for long enough, we will ALWAYS sleep!

You might find it helpful to look into evidence-based cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques since they help address the thoughts and behaviors that often get in the way of sleep. Furthermore, since CBT-I is ultimately a collection of skills, they will be with you for life — so you will always know exactly what to do should sleep become difficult again in the future.

I hope this helps!

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Author]

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