[Moran]

I’ve been struggling with insomnia even before my two children were born, but I managed to get better with some setbacks over the last three years. Now, my second son has started waking up a lot during the night, making it hard to get him back to sleep and triggering my insomnia again. My older son is now sleeping with my wife and me, and I find myself constantly switching between the sofa and the bed every night, unsure of where I’ll sleep and whether my younger child will wake up. I was thinking of bringing another bed into one of our rooms for me. What do you think of this solution?

[hiker]

Hi Moran, I am not a parent, so I don’t feel qualified to answer. I am writing this in the hope that parents will reply to you.

All I can offer is anecdotal stuff about what i have seen and heard parents do. You decide whether it is worth thinking about.

One practice is after doing what you can to comfort a small child, simply letting them deal with it, even crying themselves to sleep. While seeming to be heartless, I guess, the alternative seems to be arguably coddling them. How long will you let the kids sleep with you and your wife? (By the way, how is she dealing with all this?)

I see parents trying to prevent anything unfortunate from happening to their children, ever. Not letting them walk anywhere, no random play with kids in the neighborhood. Protecting them from the world, or trying to. All of which seems loving and well-intentioned, but how will the kids ever grow up?

As I say, better to let parents weigh in here. If you don’t get replies in this forum, how about checking in with other parents at your kids’ school, or any friends who are also parents? As kindly as you are treating your kids, the lack of good sleep must be taking a toll after a while.

Sorry I cannot come up with more, and I hope you can get better information.

[msibhatu]

Moran
It sounds like you’re dealing with a tough situation, and managing sleep with young children can be incredibly challenging. Bringing another bed into one of your rooms could be a practical solution to help you get better rest. It might give you a dedicated space to sleep without the constant uncertainty of where you’ll end up each night.

I can relate to your struggle. I also sleep downstairs, away from my wife and our two kids, who all share a very large bedroom. My wife is very protective of the kids, so this arrangement works for us. By sleeping downstairs, I’ve been able to overcome nighttime threats and wakefulness, and I genuinely enjoy the peace of mind it brings.

Finding a setup that works for your family might take some time, but it’s important to prioritize your sleep and well-being. Hopefully, creating a more stable sleeping environment will help you manage your insomnia better.

[Author]

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