[kirstypsmith]

I’ve had insomnia for 8 years and even pills don’t work anymore. I hardly ever sleep and can’t take much more. My body is constantly rigid with tension and I cannot relax no matter what I do, day or night. I know this is stopping me from being able to sleep along with the anxiety surrounding sleep and the panic that hits me during the night. Any tips on what I can do to help me relax? Thanks

[hiker]

Hi kirstypsmith, it sounds like you intellectually understand what is going on—that the anxiety about sleep itself can supersede everything. How are you supposed to sleep with this constant panic swirl?

You have gone the route of all sorts of meds. I don’t know if you have just been getting meds from physicians who aren’t exploring how all this started. Or whether you have explored. Regardless, when you “can’t take much more,” I hope you will reach out not only here, but to the Crisis Line at 988. I used to work there, so I know it’s likely you will be asked point blank: “Are you thinking about killing yourself?” And most likely you will hear what I am hoping you will do. Which is to focus just on this moment. Not the next five minutes. What can you do, in this moment, to give yourself a break? And can you call us back as often as you need to?

This doesn’t mean you paste a smile on your face and say everything is peachy. You can acknowledge the truth, even if it is that right now:

1. “I am having the thought that insomnia is a monster and I can’t take this anymore.”

It is understandable to conclude that this actually means:

2. “Insomnia is a monster and I can’t take this anymore.” In other words, that 1 and 2 are the same.

But that’s the insomnia talking. Actually, 1 is true; but 2 is not. Which sounds like babbling gibberish when you are hammered by insomnia. But rather than blow this off, how about just set it aside and check out other posts. I think you will see that millions of us have been there, are there….and some posts will resonate with you more than others.

Take care, you are no way alone is this mess.

[Martin Reed]

Sorry to hear what you’re going through, @kirstypsmith. That sounds really difficult.

Sleep doesn’t require relaxation to happen — it requires being awake for long enough and the absence of effort.

It sounds as though trying to make yourself relax isn’t proving to be effective — would you say that’s accurate? If so, what might happen if you were to move away from all the effort and attention that trying to relax requires?

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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