[Musicegbdf]

Hi this is my first post. I am male aged 63 in the UK. For all my life have been asleep as head hit the pillow guy. I retired about 18 months ago , and my insomnia started around 12 weeks ago. There was a trauma involving Covid and birth of my first grandchild. All over now and mum and baby fine. Guess went the usual route . OTC stuff , then melatonin from doctor , then onto Zopiclone. Asked doctor about CBTi , but covid has screwed things. So have got some self help books and have been following SRT . It has helped. I am avoiding using the Zopiclone unless I have a real issue or need to be up the next day and drive. The quality of my nights vary greatly . Will be going great for a few days , hitting targets , then get a real nasty night. One thing I have a problem with is the get out of bed if awake for 20 mins. Often I am laying there and think ok time to get up that must be 20 mins. I check the clock and it is maybe 90 mins and my wife and tracker confirms I was asleep . So now I am confused , and not getting up. When I did get up in the first few days it just seemed to make things worse. Anyone else find that ?
Thks

[Martin Reed]

Welcome to the forum! Your story and experience with insomnia will be familiar with many people here!

I am so encouraged to hear that you are implementing constructive techniques that will help improve your sleep over the long-term. Since you are taking action to improve your sleep over the long-term, what happens on any individual night doesn’t actually matter too much!

As you mentioned, trying to figure out when to get out of bed or if a certain amount of time has passed can be difficult, and often unconstructive since all the mental gymnastics aren’t going to help you sleep!

Since the goal when it comes to getting out of bed is to avoid reinforcing an association between the bed and unpleasant wakefulness, you might find it more helpful to decide when to get out of bed based on how good it feels to be in bed.

So, if you are in bed awake, and it feels good to be in bed and awake, then why not stay in bed? Conditions are right for sleep and you aren’t strengthening a negative association between the bed and unpleasant wakefulness.

If, however, being in bed doesn’t feel good or if you find yourself experiencing the mental gymnastics on whether or not to get out of bed, that can be a good cue to get out of bed and do anything you find relaxing and enjoyable until you feel calm and relaxed enough to return to bed.

Finally, if you feel that worry, anxiety, or a lot of sleep-related thinking and concern is perpetuating sleep difficulties, you might find it really helpful (and liberating) not to use a sleep tracker.

I hope this helps!

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Musicegbdf]

Thanks Martin , it is really weird. I seem to have got into the good / bad cycle now. It is extreme . 2 days ago had a full nights sleep for first time in 12 weeks, then last night zero hours sleep. Today I am wrecked. My mind was not racing and i was sleepy , but just could not drop off. The only thing was by normal routine was broken by outside influence. It has made me realise I am too reliant on the routine now.

[Martin Reed]

Those big ups and downs are often associated with allotting too much time for sleep and/or getting out of bed at a different time each day. With a more consistent (and appropriate) sleep window you might find your sleep becomes a bit more consistent, too!

Here’s a short video related to this: How to stop the sleep roller coaster and make sleep more consistent and more predictable.

I hope this helps.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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