[Joanne]

For the last couple of months I have being unable to sleep on and off some nights are better than others, its now getting to the stage where I spend my days dreading the night, I would love any tips or suggestions what helps others I’d be extremely grateful, thank you

[hiker]

Hi Joanne, that is a tough spot to be in, i.e. dreading the night. I am guessing that logically or intellectually you realize that anxiety about sleep means you go around in circles: I didn’t sleep well last night, in fact for the last week or longer, and what if this keeps going, how am I going to live, I don’t want to live if this is my life from here on out, etc.

And if you have been reading a number of posts here, you have discovered that there are millions of us.

When I get in that nasty circle–dreading the night—I (eventually!) remind myself that my thoughts are going haywire, and I don’t take them as gospel, instead just noticing that I am feeling irritable, or anxious, or even despairing right now. And acknowledging that “I’m tired.”
Not “I’m tired and will be the rest of my life,” or “I’m tired and if only I could sleep, but I can’t and I’m a failure,” just “I’m tired.”

I would suggest reading Martin’s responses to posts and also his videos. And while there is a lot of overblown hype about mindfulness, it is not totally just hype. E.g. palousemindfulness.com; mindfulnessnorthwest.com are two legit–and free—sites you might want to check out.

You are not alone with this.

[Scott]

Hey @Joanne!

Welcome to the forum! Have you been able to determine why your sleep has worsened in the last couple of months? Could it be due to a stressful life event? What you refer to is a common situation for those who suffer from insomnia. Having a couple of poor nights of sleep can lead to anxiety about sleep and dreading bedtime the following day. My insomnia experience was similarly to yours. I listened to a health podcast discussing the alleged health consequences of poor sleep and I began to have anxiety and make adjustments to my sleep routine which caused me to have a sleepless night. That night caused increasing anxiety the following day that began to be crippling as the weeks grew.

It’s important to know that those who experience nights of poor sleep should create an environment that promotes sleep. Some helpful ideas to build a strong sleep drive are to have consistent bed times each night and awakening times each morning and to go about your day as planned regardless of how you slept the prior night. Are you trying to compensate for those poor nights of sleep by going to be earlier, laying in bed after waking, taking a daytime nap, etc?

Scott J

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[Author]

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