[Elle]

I need advice. I go one day few hours to next day 0 hrs of sleep. I am at my wits end and worried. I’ve tried staying up
Until tired or laying in bed all night. I’ve taken melatonin and whatever meds that should relax. Nothing. Please advise.

[Martin Reed]

Hello Elle! Those ups and downs are often associated with allotting too much time for sleep/spending too much time in bed or an inconsistent sleep schedule. You might find this video helpful: How to stop the sleep roller coaster and make sleep more consistent and more predictable.

At the current time, when do you usually go to bed at night and when do you get out of bed to start your day in the morning?

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[Elle]

Ty for taking time to respond. I usually go to bed (pre insomnia) watch tv in bed lil (I kno a no no rn) and shut down by 11 hoping to sleep 6 hrs and get up between 5 and 6am. Pre insomnia this worked with no issues, sleeping at least 6-7 hours. Now changing that habit, as I’m trying, is hard to settle down. So I’m waiting till I def tired (in another room) which some nights just does not happen. I see and value your points and I am working on all the advice given. Thanks so much.

[Chee2308]

Hi Elle!
So what time do you go to bed now and what triggered your sleeping issues? If you have a lot of anxieties, I would suggest spending some time every day writing your worries down and the actions you plan to take to address them. Also make a list of to-do items that you really look forward to every day that makes you excited to get up and start your day. Things like making your breakfast, doing your laundry, feeding/playing with your pets, trying out new recipes, gardening, yoga, an early morning walk at the beach or anywhere you find peaceful and enjoyable, things like that. Try to engage in things that lift your mood and take your mind and pressure off sleeping. If you enjoy watching the telly in bed, I really think you can too! It would kinda useful to start re-associating your bed with things you used to enjoy (I don’t see any problem with this because you could sleep pre-insomnia doing these things and nothing’s really changed). Anything that helps you to relearn associating your bed with pleasant experiences would be helpful. As for me, I used to think I needed to just use the bed only for sleep, never clock watch, never take naps during the day and get out of bed if not sleeping etc well all that didn’t help me to relearn the association of bed with pleasant things. So I ditched and broke almost every rule in CBT-i, by watching youtube in bed on my phone, took naps whenever I felt sleepy, reinstalled a clock in my bedroom, started using an alarm clock that I now always use to check the time whenever I awoke, and refused to leave my bed when I couldn’t sleep and instead started playing games on my phone or watching movies, I did ALL these to show myself I wasn’t afraid of not sleeping anymore and I COULD sleep regardless. And guess what, I can! I think for every person who has sleeping problems to start being brave and dismantle those false beliefs one by one to prove to yourself nothing can stop your body from sleeping if you’re really sleepy and if you aren’t sleepy, nothing will make you sleep even if you checked yourself into a luxurious suite costing 50 grand a night and taking meds. What determines whether you can sleep is actually the amount of time spent awake, the longer you go without sleeping, the more sleepy you get. So this means if you have insomnia, it actually means you must be sleeping really well to begin with! Sounds twisted but true. It is your chasing sleep, spending too much time in bed, and perhaps sleeping way more than you realised that perpetuates the problem. Stop chasing sleep by trying to sleep when not sleepy. So all along there never was any problem at all, you thinking that there is a problem becomes the problem!

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