[Karfry87]

I’ve had terrible insomnia for about 6 months and I feel like I’ve been walking through life in a daze, but in addition to this I’ve had to care for my partner who has cancer and work full time so it’s not been an easy ride.

I got to a stage 2 weeks ago when it all became too much to handle and I wasn’t coping and was signed off work. It took that to happen for me to realise I needed to do something about my insomnia.

I’m now seeing a therapist for CBTi and started sleep restriction therapy 5 days ago. I’m really suffering with this and finding it extremely uncomfortable, I have to literally stand up and walk around my lounge room between 11pm and 1am (the start of my sleep window) to keep my eyes open and when I wake the next day I feel absolutely exhausted ? I feel like it is in no way getting any better but know I have to preserve. I have also have a very mild case of restless legs so that’s an added ‘bonus’ ?

Look forward to hearing from others who are going through this and have successfully come out the other side.

[Martin Reed]

You are definitely going through a really challenging period — I think it’s important to recognize this and to practice some self-compassion since it’s so easy to forget to treat ourselves the same way we’d treat a friend or family member going through the same thing!

Furthermore, the techniques you are implementing are challenging — the first couple of weeks of sleep restriction, in particular, can be particularly difficult.

When you go to bed at the start of your sleep window, are you falling asleep quite quickly? How does the night go when you get into bed at 1:00 AM (and what time are you getting out of bed to start your day)?

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Karfry87]

Thanks for coming back to me Martin! I drop off within about 10 mins after getting into bed and then I usually wake about 2-3 times during my sleep window, frustratingly this also happens early at 6am and then I’m not sure if I should just get up or lay and rest as my wake time is 7am.

I’m just really exhausted and feel like giving up on this but know that I need to at least try.

Thanks
Karla

[Martin Reed]

I admire your persistence and tenacity, Karla! The fact you are still doing this, even though it feels really uncomfortable, shows that you are still able to control your behaviors and do hard things even in the presence of difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions!

Waking during the night is a normal part of sleep — so the fact you recall waking during the night is not unusual. If you aren’t already doing so, it can sometimes be helpful not to check the time during your sleep window.

Have you got in touch with your therapist to discuss your concerns and get some additional support?

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Shattered]

Hi Karla,

I feel your every word, you poor thing, i’m too doing the sleep restriction but more sleep compression for the last 5 nights. It takes me 2-3 hours to go to sleep every night no matter how tired I am, sometimes I don’t go to sleep. I started reading Martins podcasts and youtube videos Monday after a horrendous night, that night i stayed up really late until i felt sleepy, i don’t mind staying up late as I’m a complete night owl but have a 8 year old son so had to change my whole life around when he arrived. I go to bed now (since Monday) at 1-2am and i don’t get back up again even if i am not alseep in 30 minutes as I’ve never gone to sleep in 30 minutes in my whole life so i just wait it out and i get up at 8am . I’m exhausted this week but no different than when i stayed in bed all morning looking to catch up on sleep which never happens. This morning (Saturday) i asked my husband to pull me out of the bed at 8am because i really want to keep the pattern up, he got me out of the bed at 8,30 with a lot of rants! Maybe because you’re off work now could you just come down stairs and rest there? put a blanket on you relaxing on sofa, i know you’re caring for your partner so I’m sure that must be tiring also. i hope you start getting more sleep, I’m really hoping i do. i also turned the clock away so i can’t keep checking it as that was a huge thing for me, counting how many hours i had before the alarm.. . and i don’t read or go on social media anymore at night! just bed, lights out and sleep.. fingers crossed for us!

[Karfry87]

Thank you @shattered I don’t know how I’d cope if I had kids, you’re amazing!! I’ve been doing a lot of research online about sleep restriction and it seems all really positive, I’m just accepting the process and even though it’s difficult anything I try is better than nothing at all, I’m sure you feel the same. I’ve also been trying to do breathing etc before bed to calm me down. I was sleeping well the last 2 nights and I thought things had turned but last night was pretty bad! I pulled myself out of bed when I woke up again about 2am and sat for like 10 mins then went back to bed but then I just had a very light sleep until 6am! Oh well, I guess this will still happen as it’s early days. I’m back at work now so can’t really rest anymore but it’s only for 4 hours a day this week and so that might be a bit easier. I’m wishing you all the best, keep in touch! I’d love to know how you get on! X

[Shattered]

That’s tough for you, good on you for pulling yourself out of bed! i still have to master that, I’m doing it in the mornings, which I never did so I’m proud of myself for achieving that. I was so happy last night, I don’t remember it being too much of a struggle to get to sleep around 1.30ish and my son came in at 8.30am. i was completely thrilled, I got up straight away as I still could have slept on, bed so lovely and warm but I just said NO knowing it would totally disrupt tonight. So it’s 12.25 am, I’m still waiting for sleepiness to hit, it’s very isolating, everyone asleep in the world except me! oh and all my insomniac friends! I found one thing this week though, no matter how tired I was I still did stuff that I had planned, usually I end up cancelling plans, I made myself do them, and it made me feel so much better, I’ve been very depressed over my insomnia and how it’s ruling my life, after listening to Martins’ podcasts i decided not to let it (insomnia) have that much power over me and my life, I’m almost looking at it as a person trying to control me! so I’m almost telling it you’re not winning this battle any longer, I’ve had enough, sounds crazy i know but it’s held me back for too long, I’m going to struggle on and do stuff regardless of how tired i feel. it’s hard but at the end of the day i dont’ feel depressed that I’m wasting my life away thinking about how little i sleep! Good luck and stay in touch. x

[Karfry87]

Listening to you reminds me so much of myself! None of my friends or workmates seem to suffer like this and so it’s hard for me to explain how it all feels! Before I started this I was starting to get a name for myself for always cancelling on my plans, I’d come up with elaborate excuses as I just felt they wouldn’t really get the insomnia excuse, I think a lot of people who don’t go through this don’t really understand how debilitating it can be!! But I’m the same, this week I’ve made several dinner plans with friends and intend to make it and not cancel, if anything it will keep me busy and not think about how tired I am! I also had a great night last night! Went to bed at 12.30 (I was actually nodding off on the couch! I’ve never done that!) and woke up at 6.30am! Didn’t even wake up during the night! Feeling exhausted today for some reason but maybe that’s because my body needs more than 6 hours sleep, hopefully my energy will come back when I ease the sleep restriction window each week.

I hope you manage a wonderful sleep tonight!! ☺️ Sending you positive vibes!!

Karla x

[Shattered]

Hi Karla,

That’s great that you had that sleep! I was the same after sleeping for that length, I felt exhausted, body not used to it but I got better as day progressed. Last night I went to bed around 1.15 as I was yawning, I felt a little anxious because I had slept so good night before I started overthinking would I do the same tonight?? but I didn’t, it took a good hour to drop off, but I seemed to be drifting in and out of sleep all night, waking, dropping off. etc, that’s still an improvement, my husband was off this morning and when I woke I said I had a headache due to bad sleep quality, he said.. stay in bed and I’ll sort my son, I said NO WAY, that’s old behaviour, I’m getting up and staying up even if I lounge around. I’m so happy I did, it’s what I want to do, for one month I’m going to drag myself through it. I have a headache but will be fine, I’m working this afternoon so will just go with the flow. x

[Karfry87]

Well done you!! ???????? That’s great that you recognised it as old behaviour!! Amazing that you made a positive move to change things and get up!! I had a horrible sleep last night, 2 hours in total and have to go out for dinner tonight, I really want to cancel but I know that is old behaviour too and I will enjoy seeing my friends!!!

Just go easy on yourself and know that you are doing a great job!! We can do this!! Even though it’s hard we’ve done harder right!!?!

X

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