[DrummerFrank]

I used to post on here more regularly when the pandemic first started back in 2020.. I suffered from a horrific spell of insomnia from around late March-early July, getting about 1-2 hours of sleep a night (with some sleepless nights mixed in for good measure).. Getting my job back helped me recover my sleep, as well as the advice I learned from here.. My sleep confidence was back to normal levels, regardless if my OCD was still very bad.. I had what they call sensorimotor OCD regarding my breathing, and that lasted a year and a half.. I thought it would never go away, but ironically enough, it was a help to me in the bedroom, because my obsession was no longer sleep….

Fast forward to early December.. I was out with my girlfriend, and almost choked on a piece of bread, and for some reason, this trauma would hit me again in the bedroom, and I had a panic attack about it, which led to a sleepless night.. Since that sleepless night, I’ve been scared of sleep again.. It’s like 2020 came back, but perhaps even worse.. I’d say I’m getting anywhere between 1-3 hours of sleep a night, IF I can stop the heart palpitations.. Needless to say, this is the worst episode of my life, and I’m beyond depressed/anxious that my sleep has all but disappeared.. I’m now sleep obsessed once again, and fearing death from sleepless nights :(.. I need help! Thinking I may need a strong sleep pill in the interim

[MelH89]

Counseling all the way. Trust me, sleeping pills do not help. You’ll gain tolerance, end up dependent on them, and then they will stop working. Once hooked you’ll have to face withdrawals on top of the initial insomnia which is a double whammy. I was able to get off sleeping pills (Zopiclone; every night for 9 years) in May after a bout with insomnia.

[MelH89]

I’m currently having a bit of a bout again due to anxious thoughts but I was able to sleep 9 hours and 50 minutes last night (I wear a fitbit to bed). Honestly cognitive behavioral therapy will help. You don’t have a sleeping problem but an anxiety one. This fact helped me improve my sleep. You need to manage your anxiety and the sleep will come. You may be sleeping more than you realize so a fitbit can help determine that if you are able to get one. Remember this because it helps me: know one has ever died from insomnia. The body will always get some sleep in order to survive.
You can beat this because it’s your thoughts causing the anxiety which causes the insomnia. You can “rewire” the brain by changing your thought patterns. Have you ever tried Martin’s courses? He has the 2 week one which is free. Man his success rate is amazing and I’ve never done it yet. I’ve found this forum and his podcasts have helped me greatly. This is from a former avid pill popper who never thought she could get off sleeping pills. I started them at 20 and got off them at 32. I don’t want that for anybody because you can also become psychologically addicted to them. You can do this. Don’t look at it like this: “OMG I’ll never sleep again.” Take one night at a time and look at every night as an adventure. I know some days can be hard. A few days ago I was crying and asking when the sleeplessness will end. It ends when you are ready and have had enough. Some nights I lie there an overthink like this: “What do I do with my hands?” “Should I be thinking while trying to sleep.” “Will thinking keep me awake?” Etc. I literally remember thinking about putting the laundry in the dryer before passing out last night so the trick is to distract your mind by thinking about other things. Therapy can help. Martin’s courses can help. His podcasts can help. Sleeping pills? Nope, they will take away any sleep confidence you have and you’ll only believe that you slept because of them. One day at a time. You are not alone.

[Bruno]

I feel for you, and I agree with the previous poster that the ideas in Martin’s free courses and podcasts can help. I hope you’re also getting help with OCD.

I understand the challenges of having an anxiety disorder along with insomnia. (I have generalized anxiety disorder and health anxiety disorder.) I also get how a bad experience can bring back the trauma of 2020.

Good luck. I agree with the previous poster, no one dies from insomnia, and remember what Martin says: you can sleep. (It might just take a little while and some retraining to get there regularly.)

[DrummerFrank]

Thanks for the responses :).. I think I’m over the fear of dying, even if I never sleep again, but the fear is that I’ll become a vegetable.. And wouldn’t a Fitbit make me more sleep obsessed? I guess if the thing told me I got 2 hrs of sleep instead of 0, I’d feel better

[Author]

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