[Vonny]

My problem is waking up during the night usually due to hot flushes and night sweats and then not being able to get back to sleep. I have no problem falling asleep but then after 3 hours I’m wide awake. I used to be able to put myself back to sleep very easily. But now I seem to have lost that ability. This frustrates me greatly and gives me lots of anxiety when I wake up. My day time thoughts are consumed about how I’m going to sleep that night.
When I wake during the night I try and read for awhile then do some meditation for sleeping. Sometimes after about 3 hours I can fall back to sleep and sometimes I can’t. I worry how I’m going to feel the next day. Too much worrying about sleep.

[Martin Reed]

That sounds difficult, Vonny.

First, it can be helpful to know that waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. What can often make falling back to sleep more difficult is… trying to fall back to sleep — because sleep doesn’t usually respond well to effort.

If we try to make sleep happen, we can start to worry (which is normal) when it doesn’t happen. So then, we can start trying even harder to make sleep happen and we can also start trying to fight or avoid worry — or any other of the natural and normal human thoughts and feelings that can show up when things are difficult.

Before long, we can end up feeling well and truly stuck. And, because the brain’s main job is to look out for us, it’s going to generate even more thoughts and feelings about this — which can make things more difficult and create a distraction during the day, too.

So, now we can see how we might have got to this place of “stuckness” — perhaps the way out of it is to backtrack a little?

* To move away from putting effort into sleep, to move away from trying to fall back to sleep when we wake at night. An alternative might be to do something more appealing at night whenever you find yourself struggling. Not with the goal of making sleep happen, but with the goal of building skill in experiencing wakefulness with a bit less struggle.

* To move away from trying to fight or avoid certain thoughts and feelings. An alternative might be to acknowledge them, make space for them, allow them to come and go. To be kind to yourself when things feel difficult. To refocus your attention on where you are, what you’re doing (and also perhaps what you could be doing).

I hope there’s something useful here.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Hyhan]

I experience the same!! And on top of that I struggle with falling asleep. On a bad night, I can wake up 5-6 times at night and Everytime, after a few seconds of awakenings, I swear all over. I can deal with the hot flash during the day but at night it’s just very annoying. First I have to wait for the sweat to be settled down (usually less than a min) then cool off (usually a few min) then cover myself back up and try falling asleep again. I understand it’s normal to have sleep cycle awakenings but having more than 5-10 min (and sometimes hours) interruption at night is quite frustrating.

[Author]

Posts