[Mac0908]

Thanks. Just waiting for that day when you or someone can congratulate me on 4 good WEEKS. Still a lot of frustration for not being where I want to be after 7.5 weeks now, even if it means better than where I was.

[Mac0908]

How’s everyone doing? So I’ve realized another interesting note after close to 2 months of my light SRT now. Curious if anyone else feels the same or has the same thing going on. I have the ability to make myself tired and didn’t even realize it until recently. So usually it’s around 9:30pm or so when the beginning of my “wind down time” takes place. All electronics go away, the television picture gets turned down to a darker setting, and all the lights go out. I’m usually unable to keep my eyes open by the time 10:15-10:30pcomes around. Then I’m in bed a few minutes later and would be out by 11 or so. If any of you have been keeping track, this would usually lead to a wake up time of either 5am or 5:30am, both well before my 6am alarm. Over the last week however, I’ve been pushing up my wind down time, for no real reason actually, to 9pm. This has ended up making me feel sleepy even EARLIER, and has led me to heading to the bed around 9:45pm a couple of nights. The earliest I’ve ever gone to bed these last 2 months. I bet you can only imagine what ended up happening. After crashing at 10:15-10:30, I’m up at 4:30am or so. While still 6 hours of sleep, I feel that much more shot and exhausted for whatever the reason. Just waking up at the time after 6 hours of sleep, not sure why, is that much worse than waking up at 5:30am after 6 hours. Point of this all is from here on out I will not be entering my wind down phase until 9:30pm.

[delv-x]

Hi Mac

I’ve been doing decent actually the past week or so with about 6 hrs of sleep average but at least able to fall asleep, get back to bed if I wake up and wake up with relative ease. I do wake up before my 7am time but Ill take what I can get. Last night was a little more difficult but I am trying not to worry about it because I believe it will just make it worse.

I think most of us on the boat will find that pushing the to  bed time/wind down earlier will result in an earlier rise time. For me it’s more frustrating so I try to stick with 12:00 or even a bit later. I just have this feeling that if I go to bed at 10 that I will be up 3-4am and then be bored, frustrated and more exhausted.

 

[Mac0908]

Yeah its pretty much close to common sense that the earlier your bedtime the earlier you’ll rise. This is the case even for a lot of regular sleepers I’m sure. My problem is just finding a way to finally get to 7-7.5 hours which just seems impossible to get at this point after all this time. Tonight I will push back to 10:30pm, crash around 11 and I just know I will be up at 5, 5:30 the latest. With my sleep anxiety lower than ever before I just don’t understand it.

[dragon]

Yeah the earlier bedtime is detrimental I totally agree.  Do both of you practice any mindfulness techniques or relaxation techniques?  Or how do you best keep the anxiety levels lower.  I recall Deb indicating she was employing those techniques.

[delv-x]

I do practice mindfulness and try to relax. I don’t use it to fall asleep because that I found isn’t helpful. I try to incorporate mindfulness throughout the day. Being more aware of the present moment rather than my mind drifting off into the past and future worries. It can be hard when you feel tired and a zombie but I try. As for relaxation, massages and hot baths, read, colour is what I do.

It’s hard to say how effective it is but I do find it helps me deal with the day to day stress and anxiety. This can help with the quality of sleep. If I get decent sleep, the day is usually decent. If sleep is crap then the worry machine ramps up.

If you are interested there is an app called Mindfulness Coach that’s free.

[Deb]

Hi Everyone,

I’ve changed my tactic. Last week after giving up my nightcap I had 4 bad nights in a row, which did not surprise me at all. I’d been running away from the fear of a bad night for weeks by using the nightcap. So the bad nights caught up with me when I stopped that. Well I got sick and tired of being afraid and decided to use the Guy Meadows’ method of facing those fears in bed. Not surprisingly, the first night I was awake all night, which he says is likely to happen for the first few nights because you’re directly facing your fears for the first time. The last three nights since then I was so exhausted when I went to bed that I slept through the night every night.

So I don’t know yet if the method is working or not, but all I know is that I’m tired of the fear. I’m also tired of doing everything perfectly and watching exactly when I go to sleep and get up. Instead, I’m back to going to bed together with my husband between 10:30 and 11:00 and waking up the same time with him about 6:30 or 7:00. I’m acting like a normal sleeper. And I’m determined to deal with the fears when they show up.

Guy Meadows says that if you face your fears directly then eventually they will lose their power and you will find yourself being more and more relaxed and comfortable with being in bed. As a result, you’ll naturally fall asleep more easily.

In Guy Meadows’ book he gives case histories of people using this method. One guy had insomnia for a year. When he first started this method he had a few sleepless nights. After about two weeks he found that he was much more relaxed in bed because he was no longer struggling with sleeping, even though he still wasn’t getting that much sleep.  By two months he was sleeping like a normal person again. I found this story very encouraging.

[Mac0908]

Guy Meadows was the very first sleep doctor I found in late 2016 when this all began. Nice guy, good/easy sounding methods. I even bought his book. But they only worked for short term for me. Others can be different of course, but I was only able to “welcome” the bad thoughts so much until it just stopped working. Ultimately IMO, you still need to follow the #1 rule which is not going to bed until completely exhausted as well as waking up at the same time EVERY day, even on weekends. Slowly but surely, you will improve, like I am. And I’m writing this on a zombie day as I had a bad night last night. But I know my anxiety is nothing like it was months ago, and I truly hope I’m on the right path to longer nights. I might not be super optimistic, but I just know that I’m much less anxious.

[Deb]

Hi Mac – how are you doing? Haven’t heard from you in a long time. Some of us have switched over from talking on this thread to the thread “Sleep Restriction or ACT for Insomnia.” Hope you’re ok and getting better sleep.

[Mac0908]

Hi Deb thanks for reaching out. I was on vacation overseas so sleep to me hasn’t really been a thing in the last week or so. Interesting thing to point out though that when I returned I was very jet lagged the first few nights back home and by 9pm I could NOT stay awake. Felt more exhausted than I ever have. I couldn’t think of anything but going to bed. I did, and I slept 7 hours for two nights in a row. Just goes to show you how important going to sleep SHOT really is. It overrides most of the anxiety and will usually get you a better night of sleep, at least in my history. Problem was that these nights of going to sleep at 9pm were like the equivalent of going to sleep at 3am which is why I was so tired. That’s not realistic on a daily basis of course but it has definitely just been a reminder to never enter that bedroom unless we are completely sleepy/exhausted/eyes droopy!

how are you doing ?

• This reply was modified 5 years, 8 months ago by Mac0908.
• This reply was modified 5 years, 8 months ago by Mac0908.

[Deb]

Good to hear from you, Mac. Glad you had a vacation and got some rest at least. I’m chronicling my journey of implementing ACT on another thread, ‘Sleep Restriction or ACT for Insomnia.” Join us there.

[Author]

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