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When I started having insomnia (3+ more bad nights per week for more than a month), I moved out of the Queen bed with my husband to our guest bedroom. I started doing this on occasion a few years ago so I wouldn’t wake him up with my tossing and turning. In the guest room is where I do the CBT-I techniques, getting out of bed in that room, sitting on a small couch with the light on usually listening to an audiobook. Was this the best idea or should I return to our queen bed once I get sleepy again? I’m kind of fearful of sleeping in our bedroom any time soon but I really don’t want to sleep in the guest room the rest of my life! I was hoping as soon as I’m “cured” I’ll go back to our bed we’ve slept in together for almost 40 years! Any thoughts?!
In my opinion, if your long-term goal is to sleep in your own bed with your husband then that is the only place you should allow yourself to sleep.
In the short-term, it might be easier to sleep in a different bed but — as you pointed out — this doesn’t help address any conditioned arousal that might still be present with your own bed. So, all the initial problems with sleep might return as soon as you return to your own bed.
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