[Lozelise]

Im nearly three months into this, so I guess I’m almost “medically” chronic now. My confusion arises around how I could have all these anxieties around sleep my whole life, and have short bouts of insomnia here and there, but this time it hasn’t gone away when in the past it always has? I just truly don’t understand what’s different this time.

I don’t spend my days worrying or thinking about sleep as much and the struggle is just a normal part of life for me now (more than it was in the first few weeks of this). But I still just toss and turn for hours or wake up at 6am after falling asleep at 1am. Even though I’m actually very calm in bed I still have these struggles most nights.

It’s the persistence I just don’t understand. Is it purely a circadian rhythm/routine thing? Not sure- but I still have hope one day I’ll just start sleeping again normally.

I’ve also developed worsening acid reflux which is frustrating, it’s always worse after a bad sleep!

[Martin Reed]

My guess is that your brain might be identifying nighttime wakefulness as a threat — so, ironically, as it’s trying harder to protect you from wakefulness it’s keeping you awake. And, perhaps you might be responding to that by trying to control your mind — for example, by trying to make yourself calm or relaxed, or by otherwise trying to control your thoughts and feelings.

So, what might be helpful is to explore how you might experience wakefulness with less struggle — less tossing and turning, less effort, less control. With more willingness to experience wakefulness, it might be less of a presence and less of an issue.

It might also be helpful to figure out why your brain might be identifying wakefulness as a threat. If you got the exact amount and type of sleep you would love to be getting, what would you be doing (or doing more of) that you are unable to do (or do less of) now?

If you did those things now (or did more of those things now) perhaps that could help you continue moving toward the life you want to live while also training your brain that wakefulness isn’t a threat that it needs to be quite so alert to protect you from at night.

I hope there’s something useful here and I wish you all the best 🙂

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