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First, a huge congratulations on your success with CBT-I!
Your body will achieve the necessary amount of sleep it needs but the best determination of how much sleep you might need depends on how you feel the following day. What is it about getting 5.5 hours of sleep that concerns you?
Saying everyone should get 8 hours of sleep is like saying everyone should wear a size 8 shoe. The required sleep amounts differ from person to person.
If you get 8 hours of sleep one night it shouldn’t have any bearing on if you’re sleepy at bedtime. It’s more important to wake at the same time every morning than it is to go to bed at the same time every night.
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Jess,
I know we’ve exchanged messages on the forum over the weeks so it’s encouraging to hear of your progress. Remember, progress is still progress and it was your dedication that created that achievement!
How do you know you’re not achieving deep sleep – which is typically measured with a polysomnography test? Deep sleep usually occurs towards the start of your sleep cycle with lighter sleep occurring more towards morning/wake up time.
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What’s going through your mind when you have a monkey mind? How has your sleep experience been with the prescription, Benadryl and the gummy?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You describe a common occurrence of how insomnia begins for some people – stressful life event > temporary sleep disruption > anxious thoughts about our sleep > our thoughts and behaviors perpetuate our sleep issue. What would you say is the biggest challenge you have with sleep – falling asleep, staying asleep, waking too early, ruminating thoughts about your sleep, etc?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Most of our thoughts are unhelpful and only become harmful once we begin to believe in them.
Thoughts are just…thoughts! You can’t control them but you can change how you respond to them by saying, “Thanks, mind, for sharing that thought!” and continuing with the activity you were doing when it arrived. It doesn’t mean that’ll be the end of the visits of that thought, but if you respond to it the same way each time, you’re relationship with that thought will become less arousing.If you’re able to fall asleep in the chair/couch but not in your bed, it’s usually considered conditioned arousal associated with your bed. We’ve have associated our bed with arousal and wakefulness. Are you currently implementing any CBT-I techniques? If not, I’d recommend you browse the resources on this site and Martin’s YouTube videos for additional details on these evidence-based methods.
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What video are you referring to that recommends spending nights awake to overcome insomnia? You can begin implementing the CBT-I techniques while taking sleep meds but if you’re wanting to reduce or eliminate the use of them, I’d recommend consulting with your physician. If you consistently implement CBT-I methods and have some patience, I believe you’ll have some success in restoring your sleep though.
I wonder if those “rituals” you mentioned have become sleep efforts. Sleep isn’t one of those tasks that rewards hard work, and in fact, the more effort we make trying to force ourselves to sleep, usually makes the issue worse.
Scott J
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Julia,
We have much less control over when our thoughts arrive and what our thoughts are than we think we do but we can control how we manage, interact and respond to them. You can’t prevent thoughts from arriving but just because they appear doesn’t mean we have to give them attention. And remember, thoughts are only harmful when we start to believe in them!
If the thought, “I won’t sleep again tonight” generates arousal but “I’m a 3-legged giraffe” doesn’t, it’s because you’re taking the first thought too serious. A better method of managing the negative thought that arrives is to thank your mind for bringing it to your attention. When you have that insomnia related thought make an appearance, just tell your mind, “Thanks for sharing!” and return to doing your activity. Chances are – it’ll revisit just like a bully does on the playground but be consistent in your relationship and, over time, you’ll become less and less aroused when the thought appears. Believe it or not, I still experience some of the same thoughts I did when I was battling insomnia but I’ve learned how to manage those thoughts so they aren’t harmful to me now and doesn’t interrupt my sleep. This is a practice that takes time though but I believe if you remain consistent in your approach, you’ll find some success with it.Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Julia,
I believe what you describe is about textbook for most people who are experiencing insomnia and are implementing CBT-I techniques. It’s not uncommon and can be very discouraging when setbacks occur, but it’s part of the process as your brain shifts its beliefs and association with sleeping in your bed again. I believe that the only way for CBT-I not to work would be if that person doesn’t consistently implement the methods or completely abandons them. I, too, experienced many of the same thoughts and behaviors (~3 yrs ago) you’re currently having but since implementing CBT-I, I’ve been able to restore my sleep to pre-insomnia days. There are sporadic days, especially when I travel, when I experience an occasional restless and difficult night, but I know I can carry on the following day without detriment to my daily life or have anxious thoughts about my poor night of sleep.
Hope that helps!
Scott J—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hey @kylefleming21,
What you’re experiencing is understandable and considered normal when we have stressful life events as you describe. Our sleep really becomes a problem when our thoughts and behaviors toward our sleep begins to change. All your additional worry about sleep makes the sleep problem worse, fueling even more anxiety, creating a vicious loop throughout the day and into the night. How many hours, on average, of sleep are you achieving at night? Specifically, what you do you consider your most challenging sleep issue – falling asleep in bed, staying asleep, waking too early, anxious thoughts about sleep, etc?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome @doutorsono2270,
What is an average night of sleep like at the current moment? What is the biggest challenge you face with sleep?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Maybe we could collect more information on your current sleep habits. How many hours of sleep are achieving on an average night? When you have these middle of the night awakenings, which are considered normal, do you become anxious and frustrated or do you remain relaxed? If you’re anxious, what is going through your mind during those times? Do you get out of bed or stay in bed when you wake? What time do you go to bed and what time do you get out of bed to start your day?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds like you’ve been doing a good job of implementing CBT-I techniques! Instead of identifying individual activities and classifying them as sleep effort, I think it might be better suited if we offer a blanket definition for it. Any practice you engage in or decision you make in an effort to improve your sleep or to force sleep to arrive instead of doing it for the simple pleasure of it, is probably considered sleep effort. Adding or removing things in your life in hopes it generates (better) sleep, is considered sleep effort. If we put effort into fixing our sleep, it doesn’t reward us for our hard work and can actually perpetuate the issue.
Does that help?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Lying in bed does make it more challenging to engage in another activity after you’ve acknowledged the thought. If you have a specific repetitive negative thought, give it a name. For example, “Oh, here comes that ‘I won’t sleep tonight’” thought again. Once you’ve acknowledged the thought with that reaction, let it be. It will probably return, but treat it the same every time – welcome it, let it pass and move on to the next thought that arrives. Even though I’ve not had insomnia for years, I still practice visualization while lying in bed as I find it helps with my monkey mind from work. I usually use the same image/scene – sitting on the beach, listening to the ocean waves, sipping on my fave drink and people watching. It won’t eliminate any unhelpful thoughts – that’s not the purpose of it – but it does relax me from a stressful day.
Hope that helps,
Scott J—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What is your sleep restricted window and how long have you been following these techniques? Have you modified your daytime routine (naps, canceling social events, etc) to accommodate your sleep issue? Are you experiencing any anxiety close to bed time or when you experience these middle of the night awakenings?
Scott J
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s not surprising you were experiencing some anxiety due to a couple of major life changes for you. Why do those negative sleep thoughts seem to generate so much anxiety for you? We have much less control over our thoughts, when they arrive and when they’ll leave than we think we do. Instead of trying to control your thoughts, have you considered changing the relationship with them? A simpler and better method of managing your negative thought is to thank your mind for bringing it to your attention. When you have that insomnia related thought make an appearance, just tell your mind, “Thanks for sharing!” and return to doing your activity.
Keep in mind that thoughts are just that…thoughts! Thoughts don’t really hurt us, but our actions toward them can. If the thought, “I won’t sleep again tonight” generates arousal but “I’m a pink unicorn” doesn’t, it’s because you’re taking the first thought too seriously.
Hope that helps,
Scott J—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
