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I feel the opposite. When it's dark and night or early morning, it tends to make me feel really lonely, even anxious. I prefer the daylight, but the schedule I've been on until recently has me up late and up early (eg. 4am) so it is dark a lot…too bad, we could trade, my night for your day, because the sun tends to make me feel better, even if I don't do anything productive that day. That's one of the things I love about California.
Welcome Lyn. I hope you find this site as friendly & helpful as I have. I too know the horrors of having to “rely” on sleeping pills. My tolerance builds up very quickly, and I am ashamed to admit I have self-medicated at times out of desparation when they stop working or when they aren't working. I am trying really, really hard not to do that anymore. The ones that work best for me–Ambien and Valium, I build up a tolerance to too quickly, so I use them sparingly. I've recently gone back to taking Trazadone for sleep. I get mixed results, but it's been better this time around than the last time I was prescribed it. The nice thing about it is that from what I hear and can tell it is “safe” to take just about every night. I know my Mother has been taking it daily for years, and she hasn't developed a “dependency” (meaning an increase in toelrance or drug-seeking behavior) but she still has trouble, as I'm sure you may have tried it–it's light weight compared to some of the other stuff, and does sometimes have the tendency to give that nasty next day grogginess/hangover.
We're all here to support you. Welcome again. I look forward to seeing more of your posts. And good luck getting some sleep.
Listening to some of the new album from Kid Cudi. What a genius. Kanye-brilliance without the ego, and much more emotion and deep thinkery.
“There's something terrible about reality and I don't know what it is. No one will tell me.”
-Guiliana (Monica Vitta)
Red Desert
Written and Directed By: Michelangelo Antonioni
I just finished “organizing and rating” iTunes stuff. This basically means, I spend a few hours staring at the screen rating songs, and messing around with my playlists. Now I'm catching up on Insomnia Land and thinking of what I might watch later tonight…a movie…or maybe some TV shows…or both.
Morningstar Veggie Burger with slices of “fake” Swiss and “fake” Cheddar. Dunkin' Donuts Pumpkin Spice coffee in the coffee queue. Starbucks Vanilla Natural Fusion earlier today. And of course, my old standby, Pepsi Max.
Hey Franky, nice to have you back. I haven't seen you on MSN when I've been on, but I notice you've been a bit more active on Twitter…
…me, just hanging in there, for once, I've been getting “too much sleep.” Today has been good, got about 13 hours. I'm not expecting it to last forever, but am enjoying it while it lasts. I've been sleeping better ever since my trip to Texas.
'emmaree' wrote on '24:Matt and all this means??
blah blah blah ginger blah blah (( what a dog hears when his master speaks to it ))
Larson
I had to look it up on wikipedia, even though I don't particularly trust the site. Basically, it's mathematical principles applied to the concept of time, which is used heavily in the second season from which the quote came from. I'll try to post a less random, more coherent quote before I head off to Texas for the week.
'cherrychapstik' wrote on '25:We think it's because of stress. I have a counselor and a doctor. I'm going back to the doctor because I ran out of my two week ambien, and tried to sleep on my own, but it was horrible. I've heard ambien causes rebound insomnia, but I'm at a place that I can't do the rebound insomnia anymore than I can do regular insomnia. I'm in school and that makes it hard to do any sort of insomnia. One day of focusing is an entire day lost you know? I'm so worried because I DONT want to be addicted to pills. I don't even know how to tell if I am. But last week was the best week I've had since this started and that was because I took ambien each night and slept, and was starting to be able to get back to sleep if I woke up. Feel as if I'm just going to make it worse and have to start all over again now that I have no more ambien. Going back to the doc on Tuesday. I'm feeling the need for reassurance that if pills are the best way to go for now I should just take them, but all I really get from people is that they will mess me up and it causes more stress.
My band is a rock band. I love it. It helps me deal, and I'm just in it for fun!
Chipotle really is the best. I found one the other day and I was excited.
Maybe you should talk to your doctor about using Ambien on a short-term (or long-term as needed basis?), but if you use it short-term regularly, to reduce the doseage–e.g. every other night. I know for me, I can only handle about once or twice a week with Ambien or my tolerance kicks in. Rebound insomnia has not so much been an issue for me, but I know it is for other people. Sorry for the random ramble, just brain storming.
Wow. 45 hours. That's a long time. I wish you'd been able to get more sleep, but hopefully the 4 hours you did get helped and is a step towards more sleep to come.
(In no particular order)
Caffeine
Medication
Headphones & iPod (they kind of go together)
“Axiomatic-set theory cannot probe the antinomies within itself without antinomies.”
-Yuki Nagato (in reference to continuity among past and present)
The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya / SSN. 2 / “Bamboo Leaf Rhapsody”
