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Thankyou so much for your quick reply Martin! But I actually did take half a zopiclone last night becasue i was feeling desperate. A combination of distressing factors brought this episode on and i was desperate to get a few hours sleep becasue the anxiety was ramping up and i felt like I was falling into a bad place. But i still stuck to the program. And the pills dont really work any more anyway. I slept for 3 hours and then still needed to get up for 30 mins or so. Then i went back and fell in an out of sleep until it was time to get up. It was a night similar to how things were before they fell apart a few days ago. And this morning im back to feeling positive about the program and I’m still determined to stick with it.
Regards
Susie.Hey Martin, Okay, this isnt the success story it was last weeek. I am now 4 and half weeks into the program and i was doing really well up until four nights ago but since then things have gone down hill fast. I had got to the stage where i was going to bed and falling asleep within 15 minutes, staying asleep for 2 to 3 hours and then waking to use the loo and then was able to go back to sleep pretty much straight away for another 3 hours. I must have been getting 5+ hours sleep a night. But for the past four nights i’ve had to get up for and hour or two in the night and then have only been catnapping for the rest of my sleep window. I’ve become so tired that i thought i would sleep better last night but it was the opposite. I didnt fall into a proper sleep straight away and needed to get out of bed after about 1.5 hours. I stayed up for about 2 and half hours. Evven though i was extremely tired i didnt feel sleep enough to go back to bed and when i did I still only catnapped until i needed to get out of bed in the morning. Right now i’m wondering if this is a common thing. Do people relapse during the program. Thinking about using a sleeping pill tonight becasue i’m so fuzzy and tired and not functioning very well. I dont know what to do with myself other than go walking or bike riding as if i sit down i start to nod off.
hi martin, thanks for the repy! I’m doing great! Really interesting to read that post i made on my thrid night in. Oh boy, those first few days were so hard and it was good to be able to read the success stories of other people. But even after just a few days i could see that the program was going to work for me. Things continued to be hard for a couple of weeks but I’m almost 4 weeks in now and there have been lots of changes. I’m not going to lie, i’ve often felt like a zombie at times, but i think i may be over the worst. One of my biggest problems was staying awake until the bedtime i set for myself at midnight. I was so tired but i didnt dare sit down on a couch. I had to stay sitting on a hard stool or walk around. I started going to the movies and that helped as long as it was a noisy action movie with lots of car chases. Not my usual kind of movie but i was looking for anything to help me stay awake until bedtime. In the end i came up with the idea of going to the gym for a couple of hours between 8 and 10pm. I actually fell asleep on one of the machines a couple of times (haha!) but overall it worked really well. I’m still going! Not only do i get to stay awake i also get to up my fitness. So now i’m going to bed at 11.30 until 6am. I fall asleep pretty much straight away and i’m sleeping better every night. Usually have to get up once in the night to go to the loo but i’m able to go straight back to bed and fall asleep quite quickly. Things seem to be improving just a little bit every night. I have this wonderful feeling of empowerment and i’m starting to feel normal again. I had got to a place of feeling very desperate so i now feel incredibly grateful to have found this program. Thankyou!
hey mini, i’ve set up a whole bunch of things for me to do besides reading. I have 2 diffferent jigsaws on the go. I find these are great becasue they’re so soothing to do and i dont have to think about them like you do when you’re reading a book. Also have a sudoku book which is also kind of thoughtless occupation. But one of my favourite things to do is use my journal. I use gel pens and i just draw line after line, all freehand, until i’ve filled the page. I do both horizontal and vertical lines. I like using journals with black pages and mostly white gel pens. I write the date and time and i usually add a couple of stick figures or a few words around the edge, maybe a thought i’m having or a phrase…. eg,’awake again….this too will pass
I call these my meditation lines…. again, so soothing to do.
I’ve been doing program for 2 weeks and no longer need to get up during the night. biggest problem is staying awake until bedtime. Cant believe the program is working so well…. no more sleeping pills!! Ive had anxiety driven insomnia since i was a child….
All the best, it looks like this really works if you stick to the program.hi Natalie, Ive been doing the program (diligently!) for fourteen nights. And its working really well. The first 4 nights were horrendous, getting out of bed when i couldnt go back to sleep was so hard becasue its the middle of winter and i was so tired even though i couldnt sleep. But i was so tired by the fifth night I slept for 5 hours…. without medication!! Rarely have i ever done that even with medication. I know i’m only 2 weeks in but i can see this program works and i feel like i’ve discovered something that i can use for the rest of my life if i need to. Havent thrown the sleep meds away yet but i havent taken any since i began and i’m getting close to tipping them down thet toilet. Thankyou Martin!!
Thankyou for sharing your story Fiona. I’m now on day three of the journey and I’m reading a few success stories every day to help me cope. The stories are so very helpful when i’m feeling the fear and anxiety of launching into this program. I keep telling myself it surely cant be worse than what i’ve been going through for years with no end in sight. Thankyou again.
susie.Thankyou for sharing Ralph. I’m just starting out and about to go into my third night. Reading stories such as yours is so damn helpful. After years of wondering how i would ever get out of this hell I feel I’ve finally found something that seems like it will actually work. I know i’ll be writing my success story on here one day soon. Thankyou again.
Wow!! Thankyou so much for the encouragment Scott. You have no idea how much i appreciate you reaching out. This is my third night of the program and your words are helping me as i slowly wind down to bedtime. The anxiety was beginning to creep up but your email has decreased it by at least half. Suddenly i dont feel so alone. And yes i agree, Martin seems really lovely. I know the next few weeks could get challenging but i also know i can do it. Feeling so damn blessed to have stumbled onto this site. Thankyou again x
Thankyou so much for sharing your experience. I too have lived with insomnia on an off for many years going back to childhod. I found Martins podcast a couple of days ago and for the first time in a very long time i’m feeling a real sense of hope. I’ve just signed on to the forum and reading through the posts is deeply moving. Just hearing about other people who have gone through the hell of insomnia and recovered is wonderful. One of the hard things about insomnia is how alone i feel at times. No one i know seems to understand the hell that it can be. Thankyou again for sharing.
Thankyou so much for sharing your experience Scott. It resonated with me becasue i’m very much into fitness also but i’m wondering how long i can keep up my daily routine becasue i’m I’m going through hell right now and i’m exhausted. I’ve dealt with periods of insomnia all my life but the past 5 years have been pretty damn bad and i dont know how ive got through the past 2 years. I’m now surviving on maybe 2 or 3 hours of sleep a night and often go through nights without any sleep whatsoever. even though i’ve been using zopiclone on and off. I found Martins podcast a couple of days ago and this is my first night on the forum and my first night of trying the CBT-i program.
Its 2.30am, and i’ve been out of bed for the past 2 hours and for the first time in ages I’m feeling a small glimpse of hope as i read through the success stories. Just finding people who have been through some of what i’m going through is deeply moving. No one i know seems to have any understanding of the hell that insomnia can be. Thankyou again.
