That racing heart you describe is a common response to worry or anxiety — in effect, your body is activating the “fight or flight” response in preparation for the perceived threat of going to bed! You have experienced so many nights of struggle that your body now sees going to bed as unpleasant and a potential threat — and this makes sleep more difficult.
You would likely find it very helpful to implement CBT-I techniques. Have you heard of CBT-I or tried implementing techniques such as sleep restriction and stimulus control? These techniques can help reduce the power of the arousal system and build sleepiness to help you sleep.
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