[jerrycanister]

Hello,

I’m a male in my late forties who’s struggling with insomnia and decided to join this forum to seek wisdom and reassurance from those with similar experiences to mine. I’m in otherwise good health, avoiding junk food and doing running and calisthenics most days.

Long story short: three years ago I experienced something traumatic that left me with severe insomnia. I could go days without sleep, but I managed to beat it back using a combination of sleeping pills, sleep hygiene and basic CBT-techniques. However, it didn’t go away for good and has continued to rear its ugly head once or twice each year, usually lasting a few days only, thankfully.

This year has been particularily bad, however, and I struggled the entire month of June and the better part of July with insomnia before my sleeping patterns returned to some semblance of normalcy. The joy was shortlived, though, and now, at the end of September, my insomnia has returned once more, worse than ever. It is as if my body is shock full of cortisol, and I’m not able to relax no matter how hard I try. There’s a pressure in my forehead and I’ve lost my ability to yawn. I also feel emotionally numb, if that makes sense to you. For example: I want to cry, but I simply can’t. Unless I take a sleeping pill I won’t get any sleep in a normal sense. I do experience a lot of microsleeps and microdreams (=scary) throughout the night, though. I guess that explains why I’m feeling alright during daytime, despite the lack of real sleep.

What’s the best course of action to get out of this mess? Is the only feasible way to ditch the pills and ”let go of the struggle”, despite my mental fortitude not being the best (I tend to freak out badly after multiple nights of no sleep)?

Thanks for reading and all the best!

[Martin Reed]

I think you shared a big insight in your post when you openly wondered whether letting go of “the struggle” might be a good course of action — and that’s because it’s often when we try to fight or avoid difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions (that seem to get generated en masse when we are living with chronic insomnia) that we get most caught up in those difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions — because they cannot be controlled (just like sleep itself).

I think it can be helpful to focus attention on what we can control — and, luckily, no matter how bad our insomnia might be, we always have control over our behaviors and our actions. So, we can implement new habits that create good conditions for sleep and we can do things each day (no matter how small) that help move us toward the kind of life we want to live, regardless of how we sleep and even in the presence of difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

I hope this helps.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[jerrycanister]

Thank you for taking your time to answer, Mr Reed. Your input is greatly appreciated. As are the insomnia snippets and the interviews with your clients (inspiring people) that you post on your YouTube-channel.

What you say is true, of course. When I beat back insomnia the first time around I somehow managed to implement a thought process that basically went like: ”I can’t do anything about this, so I have to learn to live with it the best I can. Whatever happens, happens”. I stopped taking pills and after a half a week or so of suffering, sleep gradually returned to normal (and stayed normal for nearly a year).

My problem seems to be that I tend to forget that past experience, so when I relapse I enter full panic mode. I guess I’ve got some more practice to do in order for the beneficial thought processes to stick.

All the best!

[Martin Reed]

The brain is hard-wired to activate panic mode — it’s the reason why every single human being is alive on the planet today. Without the sensitive panic mode, our ancestors would have been eaten by saber-toothed tigers (or aggressive mountain goats) long, long ago!

That panic mode is definitely uncomfortable and doesn’t feel good. So it’s natural that we want to avoid it or fight it when it fires up. However, as you know, that only gets us trapped in the struggle.

So, it can be helpful to make some space for panic mode to fire up and do what it wants to do. Eventually, the brain will figure out there’s no real threat and return to standby mode. Allowing panic mode to activate when it wants and to run its own course isn’t easy, though — and takes a lot of practice!

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[jerrycanister]

Hah, who would’ve known that the true danger to our ancestors weren’t mammoths, smilodons and cave bears, but aggressive mountain goats! 😀

Anyway, I’ll heed your advise to not fight the panic next time I’m hit with insomnia, instead of acting up like a total loony. It’s probably not going to work the first time around, and require multiple attempts before I can sense some progress, but I’m more than willing to give it a try.

For now, my insomnia seems to have subsided a bit and I’ve slept decently for the past three nights (5-6.5 hours, which is perfectly normal for me). I hope it continues that way for quite a while.

Again, thank you for sharing your insights. What you say makes a lot of sense, and given me something to think about!

[Martin Reed]

Very few people consider the danger posed by an aggressive mountain goat! On a more serious note, I think you shared an important insight that making space for panic might take a bit of practice — and our goal is never to eliminate panic but simply to change our relationship with it.

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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