[Enabeling]

Hi! I am 28 and I have been suffering from severe insomnia since giving birth to my fourth baby in April 2020. I never experienced anything like this with my other babies, and I don’t know anyone else who has struggled with chronic insomnia. I feel so alone. My baby sleeps 12hrs a night, but I’m lucky if I can get one night with 5hrs. I often only sleep 2-4hrs per night. I have tried SR in the past but I seem to wake at either 1am or 3am regardless of what time I go to bed. I’m afraid to keep trying because I don’t know if it will get better. At this point, my psychiatrist wants me to go on seroquel to completely knock me out, and I just really don’t want to go down that route. I want to get better without meds if that’s at all possible. I’d love any words of wisdom or encouragement. I really need it!

[Scott]

Hi @enabeling!

Welcome to the forum! It’s probably not surprising to know that sleep disruption isn’t uncommon when having a baby but it usually recovers once the newborn develops a consistent sleep schedule. If sleep disruption causes us to begin thinking about sleep negatively, our sleep may not recover to the state it was prior to having a child. Are you going to bed when your newborn goes to bed or when you’re sleepy? If you were sleeping well prior to giving birth, there’s absolutely no reason to believe you can’t experience that again soon!

It’s common to wake in the middle of the night as this can occur when we transition from one sleep cycle to the next. Are you continuing to lie in bed frustrated about being awake or are you getting out of bed to do something enjoyable (watch tv, listen to podcast, etc) and then returning to bed only when you’re sleepy?

Scott J

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Enabeling]

Thank you for the reply @scottctj

That makes a lot of sense! I had a lot of anxiety about my son waking at night when he was first born, and I think that is what originally triggered my fear of my bed and sleep. I was afraid that as soon as I fell asleep, he would wake me up – which often happened! But he has been consistently sleeping through the night for months now and I haven’t seemed to recover from that original fear. Now instead of being afraid of my son waking me up, I’m afraid of ANYTHING waking me up because then I can’t get back to sleep. He goes to bed at 7pm, but I don’t go to bed until around 10pm because that was my normal bedtime before insomnia. I do get out of bed when I wake up, but it’s getting really frustrating after 7mos of getting out of bed every night. I just want to sleep!

[Martin Reed]

You mentioned that you currently go to bed around 10:00 PM — do you feel sleepy enough for sleep around that time? What time do you normally get out of bed to start your day in the mornings?

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If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[Enabeling]

I feel so honored that you replied @martin Reed. Haha! Yes, I do feel very sleepy at that time. I always get up by 6am.

[Jodi]

Just a heads up about Seroquel.

Seroquel is not a sleeping pill; it is an antipsychotic that is usually given for psychosis or at times, bipolar disorder. Now doctors can prescribe drugs for off-label uses (read: uses not listed above, outside of psychosis and bipolar) and in recent years, there has been a disturbing trend among psychiatrists to offer antipsychotics like Seroquel for insomnia, since it is also a tranquilizer and will make you drowsy.

However, the drug also comes with the possibility of serious side effects and can (esp. with prolonged use) cause disfiguring movement disorders (you can look up on youtube tardive dyskinesia, tardive dystonia, akathisia, etc.)

If you have a severe psychiatric disorder, then the benefits of the drug can possibly outweigh the risks; however, if you are taking the drug primarily for sleep then there are other, safer alternate drugs out there for that particular purpose and there are also alternative treatments to addressing sleep-related issues (like for example, CBT-I).

This message is not meant to contradict your psychiatrist ! But what I’m finding is that there are a number of doctors out there (chiefly psychiatrists) that are prescribing this drug for sleep WITHOUT informing patients of the risks of taking this drug and the fact that it is not a sleeping pill, but an antipsychotic.

[Katyh]

Dear Enabling,
I just wanted to message and say your not alone. I have just had my third back in August and never had issues with insomnia before but as soon as baby was born I’ve been suffering from bad insomnia. I either have sleepless nights or manage 2 or 3 hours at a time. The other night i managed 6 hours but it appears to be a one off.
Its really frustrating especially when your baby is sleeping through. Its hard but i wanted to let you know your not alone.
I have tried a course of cbti and continue with SR sleeping at 10 30 and waking at 5 but my sleep anxiety has become so bad that i will be sleepy watching tv but i become wired once I head to bed and then never get to sleep. I know how tough it can be and hope your sleep improves.

[Martin Reed]

Hello again @Enabeling! If you are going to bed at 10:00 PM and starting your day at 6:00 AM, this means you’re allotting eight hours for sleep. If you typically get less than five hours of sleep each night, this means you are — by default — setting yourself up for as much as three hours of wakefulness during the night (or more).

Have you considered allotting a bit less time for sleep to help reduce the amount of time you spend awake during the night, improve sleep quality, and potentially lower sleep-related worry/arousal?

—

If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Clarity program.

The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

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