[Jacob]

Hi all 🙂

After year and half i am able due to Martins YT videos to fall asleep nearly every day without a problem. but i constantly wake up every night about 2 or 3 am and after that i have very light sleep – many dreams, wakeups and again falling asleep often etc. and overall i feel that i am lacking deep sleep.

Did you encounter the same issue in the past, How you solve it? I will be thankfull for any advice. Thanks 🙂

[Chee2308]

Greetings!
What time do you go to bed? And are you taking naps during the day?

[Jacob]

I lay down in bed around 10 – 12 pm. I go to bed only when i feel tired and very sleepy. Then i fall asleep and wake up after couple of hours to go to bathroom. I cannot say when exactly. But when i lay in bed again, i have trouble to fall asleep in the deep sleep. I am sleeping definitively, because time is quicker and i dont hear anything, which i should if woke up.

But i guess its around 2 – 3 am. And I dont know if isnt better to dont go to bed for light sleep and instead doing something else to be wake up and get really sleppy again.

🙂

[Jacob]

And to you question about day naps. No i dont do them. because i dont feel tired or sleepy to fall asleep during a day. Only time, when i can get tired during a day is after lunch 😀 That is the only possible way for me to at least try to fall asleep during day 🙂 But now i will have new work, so lunch naps be imposibble to do 🙂

And thanks for respond and asking 🙂

[Jess84]

This problem with the light or shallow sleep I’ve been having where I never fall into a deep sleep so basically I’m in the state between being awake and asleep the whole night and by the time the morning comes I’m so exhausted that when my alarm goes off I can’t get up for like an hour so I sleep in which creates more light sleep and the cycle repeats itself.

I’ve had a councilor tell me that I’m making an issue out of my sleep and if only I would not
it would which I don’t agree with because I’ve already gotten out of my insomnia problem twice before and it was because I was thinking about it to the point where I got very little sleep at alland eventually I was able to sleep again also how is someone not to suppose to at least have an awareness at the very least of not sleeping properly when it affects you’re life during the day.

The thing that I’m positive on regarding the light sleep though is that the its better to do something with that time then to just stay there in bed while in that state so I’m gonna start by getting outta bed and watch something non stimulating on tv or read a novel also I can do meditation even if I end going to bed at 5:00 am and wake at 8:30 am I will be better off than if I stayed in bed all night receiving light sleep the next day I’ll most likely be exhausted
and hopefully that will turn into sleepiness so my answer is to not stay in bed if your getting
light sleep.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 months ago by Jess84.

[Chee2308]

Hello Jacob
What time do you get up every morning? Are you frequently sleeping in, snoozing your alarm and/or getting out of bed at irregular times? As someone who recovered totally from insomnia, I must stress getting into and out of bed at REGULAR times is very important. That alone is 75-80% of the work. The other is right mindset, aka, self confidence (believing you can sleep) and spending less time in bed if necessary to build sleep drive. Normal human beings need at least 16 hours of wakefulness to generate 8 hours of sleep. Try to figure out yours and calculate are you going to bed after at least this amount of time spent awake? If not, you must first establish your out of bed time and always get out of bed at this time, regardless of how sleepy you are or how you slept. Try to initially spend at least 18 hours awake continuously then slowly reduce that to 17, 16 hours by going to bed earlier in 15 min intervals, while keeping your out of bed time the same. Keep doing that until you arrive at your desired sleep duration. When doing this, be patient and persevere even during bad nights because your body will need time to respond to a new bedtime schedule. There will be bad night(s) after a string of good nights, not reacting strongly to them and sticking to the plan is key to success. Good luck!

[Jacob]

Hi Chee. Thanks for advices 🙂

I generaly wake around 2 or 3 am at night and then have light sleep to 6:15 am when my alarm start to ring. Sometimes i lay like 10 – 20 min after alarm in bed. But i dontk think this is problem. In the end i have very regular sleep window. Like tonight a go to sleep maybe around 11 pm and wake up idk around 3 – 4 am and then have fallaslleep and wake up light sleep to 6:15 I can feel like i have 4 or 5 hours of sleep.

But yeah as you wrote it getting better and better. I think eventually it will be solved,, but i ask in preventon if there is something i can do for dimiss the light sleep after not long enough deep sleep 🙂

[Jacob]

I think the real question is, how to stop that early morning wakeups 🙂 I dont know.

[Chee2308]

Hello Jacob
What is your age? Are you a retired person? Older people above 60 tend to sleep less. Most people sleep for around 6 hours anyway. If you are waking up after several hours of sleep, it just means your sleep drive is less because it’s been depleted after sleeping. It is also very normal to have lighter and rem sleep as the night goes on. This part of sleep is characterized by more frequent awakenings (most people get up to use the toilet), a lot of dreaming going on and if you are a young male, lots of morning erections too! Nothing can restore sleep drive except wakefulness. When you wake up in the early mornings, are you anxious/edgy/frustrated?

[Jacob]

Hi Chee again. Thanks for giving me your attention and time.

My age is 27. A have 1,5 year long hard insomnia, where i slet like 10 hours per whole week. I was affraind anxionus and depressed about my sleep. i cannot fall asleep nor stay in sleep. But after aplication some CBT-I techniques it gets better. Now i fall asleep like 90 % of the time without any problem.

Yeah when i sleep for like 6 hours i feel it immedietly after wake up. I feel more fresh and everything is more easy. But i slee like4 or 5 hours most of the time.

When you wake up in the early mornings, are you anxious/edgy/frustrated?

Well i guess yes, but not well. Like today i wake up early and then hit the bed again and i was quiete relaxed and fall asleep, then constant cold and winter to my back keep waking me up. But i wasnt frustrated. But night before i was. And i think its due the fact that the sleep drive is missing (becuse i slept 4 or 5 hours) and i subconsiesnely know that. Its hard for me to prolong me nice sleep time or fall to deep sleep again.

In the end i feel regenerated after that 4 hours, but weak (more like not strong) and not fresh, But 30 hours per week is still better then 10 like before and i fell the difference. But i think you understand me 😀

So i search for something which help me prolong my nice sleep time or fall back to deep sleep. Like i know light sleep is part of the normal sleep, but i feel i have more of it then normal.

[Chee2308]

Greetings Jacob!
“Like i know light sleep is part of the normal sleep, but i feel i have more of it then normal.” So you don’t believe you are normal? Yet? I think this is where your problem lies. You don’t have 100% sleep confidence and sleeping well naturally is all about your own confidence or a lack of it. Continue to do nothing for sleep, keep to regular bedtimes and slowly build your confidence to sleep normally one step at a time. Don’t go down the rabbit hole of trying endless things to chase more deep sleep in your case. Truly believe in yourself that your body will give you the sleep you need. Be patient because nobody can consciously or actively control how much deep sleep they get in the same way as you can’t control your digestion after eating.

[Jacob]

Ok,

Thanks for helping 🙂

[Jacob]

Its true, that i have not much confidence to fall asleep after early morning wake up, and its partly a problem. But i cannot get confidence in the way that i will be lying to myself. Like i wrote. I have no problem to fall asleep at start of the night, but after early morning wake up, where i can be relaxed but fall only to the light sleep, which is not enough.

““Like i know light sleep is part of the normal sleep, but i feel i have more of it then normal.” So you don’t believe you are normal? Yet?”

How could i? Sleeping 3 – 5 hours per night isnt much normal for me :D. Like i said its better then before, but i seek some good technique, wchich will help me to fall asleep after that early morning wake up. And i dont know, if is not better simply to go to the bed later at night. I am going to bed, when i feel sleepy, but maybe, if i start going ot bed later, i will wake up later too.

But i am afraid, that if i will force myself to be awake even when i am sleepy, that sleepyness will be pushed back and i will not be able to fall asleep eventually. I will try it for this week and wrote some experience 🙂

[Chee2308]

“How could i? Sleeping 3 – 5 hours per night isnt much normal for me” – Try not view sleep in terms of duration but more on quality. Be completely okay with how much you slept and try not to think too much about the hours. Avoid clock watching when you wake up during the night, resist the urge to calculate how much you slept because that only makes your mind more obesessed. Go completely timeless where you don’t know how long you slept. Just set an alarm, and all you know is the alarm hasn’t gone off and therefore you should lay in your comfy bed and try to sleep (if your body allows it) because the conditions are right for sleep. Or if you are anxious because you can’t sleep, then get up and do something you enjoy.

“I am going to bed, when i feel sleepy, but maybe, if i start going ot bed later, i will wake up later too.” – That is almost always true, if you go to bed later, you will tend to wake up later too. For now, just go back to bed when you become awake and try to believe you are a normal sleeper the best you can. If you think you are abnormal or something is wrong with you, then it starts becoming true. The story you tell about your sleep becomes self-fulfilling. Actively try to seek evidence you can sleep, like if you could sleep after waking up, even just 5 mins, then it is proof that nothing is wrong with you. Then as that 5 mins turn into 10,15,30,45 mins, your confidence will improve and you start sleeping more and waking less. Be patient because recovery won’t happen overnight. Best wishes to you…

[Jacob]

Hi a little reply 🙂

“How could i? Sleeping 3 – 5 hours per night isnt much normal for me” – Try not view sleep in terms of duration but more on quality. Be completely okay with how much you slept and try not to think too much about the hours.”

I dont, that is why i fall asleep at the start of the night. I am not that much stressed about sleep. for true i dont even watch clock, so i dont know how much sleep i have. I only gues it from the feel, my past data from sleep journal and road activity, because car starting hit the road around 3 am. I do my job, workout, sex and others activities so i am not on the bad coin of my psyche. Like i said i have problem that i woke up early and need to urinate. Its totaaly same like at the start of my insomnia nearly two years ago. Then i have totall sleep confidience, but start woke up early because urine, then i was exausted during day, but i dont care about my sleep, that start maybe only after like moth of that problem with early wake ups because of urine. And now i am in the same stage. I dont care about my sleep that much. I fall asleep easilly in 90 % of the time, but wake up after 3 or 4 hours because need to urine, even if i dont drink anything like 3 hourse before bed. And thats ok, problem is i have then problem to fall asleep, because after that sleep i lost sleep drive, which make me fall asleep.

So thats why iam asking how to prolong my sleep and wake up later or how to fall back asleep. Yes psyche and trauma play some role, but not that much in the sense i feel it stop me to fall alseep. So thats why i now trying to go sleep later and have much more sleep drive and hopefully that will help me to fall asleep again after that one wake up to urine. 🙂

“Go completely timeless where you don’t know how long you slept. Just set an alarm, and all you know is the alarm hasn’t gone off and therefore you should lay in your comfy bed and try to sleep (if your body allows it) because the conditions are right for sleep. ”

Thats what i am doing right now, i dont care about my sleep or sleep time iv got. Like today i wake up , but due to cars activity on road i cannot fall asleep fully. If i dont wake up at all, cars activity like before my insomnia will not be a problem. And i have like zero chances to change my enviroment to avoid that 😀 I cna sleep with my family, thats maybe wors because of their constant snoring and tossing around 😀 Maybe the ear plug will help, i dunt know.

” For now, just go back to bed when you become awake and try to believe you are a normal sleeper the best you can. If you think you are abnormal or something is wrong with you, then it starts becoming true. ”

Well that true, i have fear only when i need to fall asleep again at early morning hours. But now i think the problem is more like that need fo urinate and car activity. i will try solve these thing among that mindfulness and we will look at the results after that. I think its combinaton of bad enviroment/health with lack of trust to my ability to sleep again after that wake up. Thanks for recognize that 🙂

“Be patient because recovery won’t happen overnight. Best wishes to you…”

Thanks for you words and attention. Good vibes for you too 🙂

[Author]

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