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So,today I’ve been to psychiatric hospital and the only solution for me what they can do is for me to stay in hospital again.But that would be for fifth time,and probably they would drug me with meds like they did before with no psychotherapy at all.
But that was not solution before and it’s not solution is the future.
I hope you guys agree or not?
I’ve been told that nothing else can they do for me,can give me seroquel 25 mg which I avoided because it makes me groggy all day long and shrink wrote that patient doesn’t want to co-operate and take meds.
So seems to me all hell broke loose on me.Last night I slept like 3 hours and next 2 nights I work nightshifts.
God,help me please!!
I can’t stop visiting doctors thiking they can help me.
I give all my money to their exams but so far none of them helped.
Yesterday I got an e-mail from clinic in Croatia where they would appoint me to come to Tuesday.
I gave up,because 2 reasons,the doctor is psychiatrist,I mean it’s listed he is somnologists but he is very young and second reason
A trip would cost me a lot and it’v very exhausting to travel for me for 10 hours in one day.
I mean,did doctors helped you guys,any of them??Should I finally tell my self stop going to all those doctors they can’t help you in your chronic insomnia?!
I mean I changed like 20 doctors,all telling me same story,some giving pills,some telling me there is no help.
Took mirtazapine for 2 months,I felt very drowsy,then increased the dose to 15 mg in 2 weeks,and then it coudn’t make me fall asleep at all.It worked for like 2.5 months back in 2017 I think.
The worse part is I feel somehow strange over past 3 days,including today.
I feel like I’m not myself,like I’m in some sort of brain fog,and it’s hard for me to concentrate at anything,watching TV,reading book.Wtf is that?
I know it’s a feeling of derealisation,it’s not really first time this happens to me,I hope it will pass.
Maybe of all that tiredness,my brain is reacting like this.
jazzcat22 thx for the book…
So what do you guys suggest me to do?
There is no way I’m talking clozapine for insomnia,as it’s strog a.p. pill.
But then again if this severe insomnia could lead me to psychosis either way clozapine is awaiting for me.
The weird feeling I have is tiredness,like I’m in half dream-half awake state,like I’m in a fog.
I think what happened yesterday is that I didn’t feel my legs at all when I stood up,and then fell on concrete.
Probably my brain of all that insomnia stopped the legs.I don’t know…
Yes I see,nothing good about this drug,but read posts of some people who had severe insomnia and clozapine helped.
Sadly I’m afraid ending up like with zyprexa taking more and more of the drugs to get me fall asleep.
It’s same atypical a.p.
But psychiatirst disagree,he told me we have patients who take 300 mg daily,your dose could be 25 mg for sleep.
Well I told him I’m not psychotic yet not schizophrenic,then he told me do you want to sleep or no?
Can’t you see you tried all the meds on the market and nothing works anymore.
But can’t he understand that I don’t want to take sleeping pills forever,specially a.p which makes me feeling insane and dead tired and like drunk.
Is there another solution to end up this agony except suicide?
So I lost conciousness today in the local caffee and fell down on the concrete.ER came and took me to nerurology.They did EEG,blodtest and sugar,all was OK.
I felt like I’m in a dream,half dream half awake.CT of brain was luckly OK,then they said as neurology they can’t help me out,and took me to psychiatric hospital,where I’ve been told that I have severe insomnia,doctor prescribed to take me off all meds,and if sleep doesn’t return the only pill which should give me sleep is clozapine.
But sadly I will loose job,because at this state I’m unable to go to work anymore and my superior/chief will find another worker.I cried all day long,because I tried everything and nothing seems to help me out anymore.
I mean I lost sleep,I lost health due to lung,gut problems,chronis infections and now I will loose a job.
What do you think about taking clozapine for insomnia guys?
That wtf is my problem?Why I can’t fall asleep at all,nor at night nor over day.
Should I check all hormones,what is only left for me?
Something must be the cause for all these 4 years.
I mean shiftwork is not an issue, maybe it did worsen the insomnia,but as I told you,I didn’t sleep when I was sick leave/off work for more then a year,although I did take SSRI back then.
What worries me is dust allergy,when I think about it,because I changed rooms/flats,I couldn’t sleep back there again.When I was on vacation last year in summer for 10 days,I came at appartment dead tired,no,I can’t fall asleep.
Seems like the brain is somehow wired,or stuck or seems like works all the time 100 % and can not shut it self down.
I did EEG,and last doctor told me the EEG is quite normal except that I have some beta-waves which tell her I’m constantnly worried and anxious,which is obvious as she told me,cuz I don’t sleep and that is vicious circle depression-anxiety-insomnia-depression.
How do I break that circle? 🙁
This could be my diagnosis,although none of the doctors told me so.
I googled and found symptoms which are co-related with this diagnosis:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circadian_rhythm_sleep_disorder
But how do I cure this thing? :/
I don’t think it’s an issue with shiftwork.
As I mentioned I was off work for more then a year,didn’t work at all,and I couldn’t fall asleep.
Same thing happened 2 months ago,when I didn’t work for 2 months,still no sleep.
As for CBT-I there is no such specialist here,sadly guys I don’t live in USA.
But I wanna know one thing there there are evidences where people became psychotic from sleep deprivation,and so I’ve been told from some psychiatrists.Is that really true?
Sadly my immune system became so low,I got asthma,due to insomnia probably.
First it was allergy which develop into asthma.
I worked nighshift last night,couldn’t sleep at all,even not today.
I am so irritated,nervous breakdowns,tired,and depressed,and I feel like I’m in some other state of mind.
This is phisically killing me.
Can any of you guys who recommended me the book above,take pictures of some pages,at least some which could help me out.I’d appreciate it a lot.I could send you an e-mail.
What to do when doctors can’t help me out?Nor any single doctor neurologists,psychiatrists,somnologists can help me out…
What else is left for me to try.I’ve been to doctor for epilepsy and at least I could get an advice from her.
But I didn’t.
I wanna know just one thing,could this state of my insomnia sadly end up with psychosis?
No,I don’t worry about sleep at all,I accepted insomnia really,and don’t get anxious over day at all.
Cuz probably psychologiaclly deep in my subconsciousness there is strong belief that I can sleep on sleeping pills.And it happens.I am probably now in each way dependent on sleeping pills.
But there are thoughts I must say about comitting suicide because as I read here and on some other forums there are very few people who got cured.And when I think about it,suicide ideas come to me.
And saw people mostly with PTSP and very bad insomnia,not even meds can help.
The worst part for me is having serious issues with stomach,lungs,allergy,depression,and what bothers me the most is loosing things around me.Important things like wallet,cellphone etc..That makes me cry a lot.
Luckly I was able to find them,just forget where do I put them or simply loose them.
Many times it happened that on parking place I don’t even remember at which place I parked the car.
Am I loosing cognitive functions?
April I read your post 2x but still don’t understand what is there else to try,as I told you I’m not worried about sleep at all.Most doctors think like you,and that makes me frustrating.
Suicide thoughts,depression, is commonly linked to insomnia as you know.
Hmmm where can I learn that about mindfulness and meditation,through youtube?
Well all these 4 years I maybe slept naturally 3 nights.Last time was at job in the nightshift 1.5 month ago,something odd happened and I slept for 5 hours.
Since ending in ER with 96 h seroiusly withput sleep and hallucinations doctors prescribed me sleeping pills.They couldn’t sadly believe it’s true,psychiatrists told me there is no such hume beeing who can’t fall asleep for that long,and they didn’t believe me.But sadly it happened
I ended in ER given thorazine i.v. but that didn’t do anything just pure drowsiness and vertigo.
I started taking sleep pills,as I mentioned maybe which ones.
Practice sleep hygiene is good and should give results if you work normally,I mean of the suggestions is to go to bed at same time,but as a shiftworker it’s impossible for me to do so.
Last time doctor told me,stop going to all those psychiatrists,neurologists,somnologists and giving them lots of money,accept THE PROBLEM IS YOU,AND ONLY YOU CAN FIND A WAY SOMEHOW TO FIX YOURSELF.
When I asked her how can I fix myself she told me thats a long process and that was it.
But I really don’t know how,and that is killing me,as much as I don’t know the cause of my insomnia.
2 years ago I started practicing yoga for 3 months to see if there could be any help but nothing,and since I had to start walking I quit from yoga and meditation.
So what is left for me anything to do,to try homeopathy and hypnosis which I didn’t.
Last night I worked in nightshift,zero sleep,lay in bed recently but just can’t fall asleep.
I feel very very tired today,unable to even watch a movie,and tonight again nightshift.
I quit CBT because I can not do it so tired,sleepy,with nervous breakdowns,anger,depression.
I know maybe thats not good idea,because I quit everything so soon,when I try it,but this therapists doesn’t know anything about CBT-I,I doubt if it would help,but at least we can even try that.
As for a book guys,I wish I could read it.
Days pass,months pass away and the more time it spents the more I think I will never cure my insomnia,cuz I read nothing good here,and I was in hospital twice saw that people with PTSP don’t sleep even on sleeping pills,and the only one thing comes to my mind,I WILL NEVER BE CURED,the solution is to commit suicide,just don’t want to suffer anymore.
Probably because of misery I’m still searching for physical causes for my insomnia,like that allergy.
But what if my insomnia is caused by stress,lots of sleeping pills and shift work sleep disorder.
I mean I don’t worry about sleep at all,I lay in bed with empty brain but can’t fall asleep.
I can’t fall asleep even over day,dead tired no matter how sleepy I felt.
Doctors and friends of mine suggested to quit job,and shiftwork but I’m not so sure if that would solve my insomnia cuz I remind you,when I was off-work for more then a year I couldn’t fall asleep.
I’m only affraid of one thing,what if mold allergy could be the cause of my insomnia cuz nothing else comes ti my mind as a cause?
I really sadly can’t order those books,they don’t ship them here.
I talk to collegues at job,after nightshift they all sleep overday for at least 4 hours,me,I can’t sleep for 5 min 🙁
This is pathetic really.
No one in familly had insomnia issues,but one thing is for sure it all started with stressful job,panic attacks,and antidepressants.
I did MR and CT of brain,all good,so I suppose there is no problem with pineal gland.
Nothing other comes to my mind what could be the fucking CAUSE of this illness.
I read much about sleep and insomnia,but I didn’t find nowhere what it takes for a brain to shut it’s self off I mean to fall asleep?Can anyone explain me that because my brain simply won’t shut off.
Is there anyway to find pdf versions of these books,cuz amazon don’t ship them to my country?
I’m sick.Seems like I have some viral infection.My blood tests are bad.My immunity is very low obviously because of sleep deprivation.
This is pure hell.
How many doctors should I change,how many things left for me to try?
I don’t want to suffer anymore,they all tell me accept it as a part of your life but I’m crippled and can’t life the rest of my life like this. 🙁
