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Thanks for reflecting on all the progress you’ve noticed. As you have put less effort into trying to make sleep happen, there has been less struggle — and your sleep has improved.
With that being said, you still experience nights when sleep doesn’t happen as you want it to. Nights when your body is choosing to generate less sleep than you want it to generate.
When you are awake you notice your brain doing what brains do — generating thoughts. You are observing them and you continue to feel comfortable. With this in mind, what is making these periods of wakefulness a problem for you?
As the expert on yourself, what else — if anything — do you feel you should be doing or need to do differently when sleep isn’t happening as you might want it to happen?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You’ve been through a lot over the last couple of weeks. And, with that, you’ve also experienced some nights when sleep didn’t happen as you might have wanted it to happen.
A huge reflection of your progress is in how you now respond. You continue to do things that matter. You go to classes and socialize even after very little sleep. That’s not easy and you still do it. Because those things are important. They reflect who you are and who you want to be.
Through your commitment to action, you are reducing the power and influence sleep has over your life and you are continuing to move toward the life you want to live independently of sleep.
This, in turn, can also help train your brain that wakefulness isn’t a threat it needs to be alert to protect you from, reduce the pressure you might otherwise put on yourself to make sleep happen, and gives sleep the best opportunity to take care of itself.
Thank you, too, for sharing your recognition that having expectations rarely makes things better — their best outcome is neutral (because we expected them to happen, after all)!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the update — it’s great to hear from you!
You are noticing change happening as you practice what you are learning. Although there hasn’t been much struggle of late, you know that if and when struggle shows up in the future, you have the opportunity to practice responding in a different way.
And, each time you practice you build and develop skill in experiencing being awake (and all the thoughts and feelings that might show up) with less struggle.
I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You are continuing to move through the course and explore ideas for dealing with insomnia in a workable way. If you try the sleep window again, how will you know if/when it is helping?
What other actions are you practicing from the course, and what are you learning from them?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Andrew and welcome to the course 🙂
Following a rigid rule of being in bed by 10:00 PM and trying to avoid the feeling of anxiety is pulling you away from the life you want to live. And, your experience is not unique or unusual.
It sounds like there’s an opportunity for change here, if you feel that following this rule isn’t moving you closer to where you want to be.
If your goal is to learn that life doesn’t stop at 10:00 PM, what do you need to do to reach that goal?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
As shared by @Kshorkey27, feeling sleepy before bed (when there’s no effort or pressure to make sleep happen) and then feeling wide awake when you go to bed (when your brain fires up to protect you from the upcoming battle it predicts is about to happen) is very common. It can also be very frustrating.
If that surge of alertness comes from your brain trying to protect you from the battle and the perceived threat of being awake when you’d rather be asleep, what specific actions might help train your brain that wakefulness isn’t a threat and that wakefulness doesn’t need to lead to a battle?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome aboard 🙂
The early days of a sleep window are often the most difficult — especially if your goal with the sleep window is to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen.
How have things been going since you posted? It sure can feel like it’s impossible to function after a night of no sleep — and you have evidence from your own experience that you can function and you can get through those days.
As you shared, the more pressure you put on yourself to make sleep happen, the more difficult it becomes. What’s the opportunity there?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Whenever we make a change, especially one that feels important, our brain is going to be more alert to look out for us (and evaluate what we are doing or about to do).
So the appearance of anxiety is not unusual — and anxiety doesn’t stop sleep from happening. Anxiety comes and it goes so noticing that it might show up before bed and then disappear when you go to bed isn’t unusual, either.
As you shared, anxiety doesn’t usually feel good. And, that can make otherwise enjoyable activities feel less enjoyable. You can respond by not doing those activities because they feel less enjoyable (and where does that get you) and you can respond by doing the things that matter to you and that reflect who you are even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings like anxiety.
I’ll also echo what @Kshorkey27 said and thank you for sharing! By sharing your experience, you help others. By sharing your experience you also have the opportunity to reflect on your experience — and that can often reveal opportunities and insights that can help you, too!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You’re ahead of the curve already — we’ll be exploring this in more detail in Week 2!
In the meantime, and perhaps as something of a “sneak peek”, I don’t suggest stimulus control as a default response to being awake. You get to choose whether to stay in bed or get out of bed.
What I would suggest is that there’s no reason to do anything just because you are awake. If you find yourself struggling, then you have the option to do something other than struggle. Something that feels more comfortable or useful compared to struggling. And that “other” thing can be done in bed or out of bed — your choice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
No advice here, Mike — you are the expert on you! Are you taking those drugs at the current time? If so, what changes (if any) are you thinking about making and what makes change important to you?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
The human brain is always generating thoughts. As for their powers of accurate predictions and guaranteed outcomes, if you have the thought that you’ll win the lottery would that turn you into a jackpot winner?
If so, please share your secret powers 😜
If not, perhaps you don’t need to do anything with these thoughts and feelings because they might not have as much control over what happens in your life as you might have first believed.
In other words, it might be your response to thoughts (and feelings) that has all the power and influence — rather than the thoughts and feelings themselves.
You shared that you have tried to accept the thoughts — tell us more about that. What have you done to practice accepting the thoughts and what are you trying to achieve when you practice accepting them?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
There is so much wisdom in your words @Histiocytosis. A few phrases that stood out to me include:
“I have battled insomnia”
How might things be different if you weren’t battling what seems to be out of your direct control?“I try too hard to get back to sleep.”
How might things be different if you didn’t actively try to make sleep happen?“In fairness I also have great spells where I sleep very well.”
You know that you have a natural ability to sleep and to sleep well.“I think too much…”
Since the human brain is always thinking, what if thinking itself was not so much a source of struggle compared to how you might respond to the thoughts you notice?Merry Christmas to you, too — and thank you @sleep for your kind and supportive response as well. It sounds like moving away from trying to control sleep has made a huge difference for you.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your experience is reminding you that the more you try to make a feeling of “calm” happen, the more difficult it can be to feel calm. The more you try to control what is out of your control, the more you struggle and the more difficult things become.
Thanks to your growth mindset and understanding that growth and change is always possible, you are revisiting the course content from Week 1 onward. As you do that, perhaps some opportunities will reveal themselves to you — opportunities that will move you away from an ongoing struggle with sleep and all the thoughts and feelings that can show up when it doesn’t happen as you might want it to.
I’d love to hear your thoughts — as the expert on yourself — on what a workable action plan might look like as you continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds an opportunity is presenting itself to you.
You have the opportunity to share a bed with your daughter and your husband because that’s important to you.
You might also have the opportunity to practice the AWAKE exercise if you find yourself struggling while sharing a bed with your daughter and your husband.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Fear once held you back. Now you are moving forward, even in the presence of fear. I wish you all the best on your journey — you are not alone!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
