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Thanks for sharing that you are playing around with the AWAKE exercise!
The final step of the AWAKE exercise (Experience wakefulness, thoughts and feelings with less struggle) is open-ended and flexible. You don’t need to find something enjoyable — but it can be helpful to do something that’s more pleasant than battling and struggling (and that can be done in bed or out of bed).
If you were to get out of bed when awake, what would you be doing while out of bed and what would you be trying to achieve?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
For as long as you act in ways that reflect your values and move you closer to the life you want to live, you are moving in the direction you want to be heading — no matter what thoughts are also present.
The feelings of light headedness, nausea, dry burning, sore eyes and shakiness can be difficult and distracting and, of course, you’d rather they weren’t present.
You know from experience that you cannot directly or permanently get rid of those things. They’re going to show up from time to time.
With that in mind, what’s the most workable way of responding when they show up?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
There’s a lot to try to remember when you’re new to the AWAKE exercise — and so using the guided audio to get more familiar with the process can be really helpful!
As you shared, when you practice the AWAKE exercise there can be a sense of calm as a bonus side-effect of experiencing wakefulness and all the thoughts and feelings that might be showing up with less struggle. As you pointed out, that’s not the intention of the exercise but if it happens, by all means enjoy that!
Wanting to be “fixed” immediately is totally understandable! Ultimately you are learning new skills and new skills take time (and ongoing practice) to develop. Every time you get the practice in, you are moving closer to where you want to be 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome home, Kevin! It sounds like there might have been less pressure to “perform” sleep when on vacation and so it became a lot easier 🙂
You are now home and continuing to practice what is shared in the course. The 3 good things exercise is helping you notice more of the good stuff that happens, independently of sleep.
You also plan to continue playing around with the AWAKE exercise whenever you find yourself struggling with nighttime wakefulness.
Thanks for sharing and I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing, Megan!
As you take what is shared in the course and put it into action, the approach of bedtime has become a bit lighter. There’s less rushing and less pressure. It’s more pleasant. You have more time available to do interesting or enjoyable things.
You are rediscovering a sensation of sleepiness, you are expanding the focus of your attention by practicing the 3 good things exercise, and you have started practicing the AWAKE exercise to help you build skill in experiencing wakefulness with less struggle.
I wish you all the best as you continue to practice, continue to learn, and continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the great question, Matilda!
I don’t think there’s a universal best answer here. If you were to get out of bed before the end of your sleep window, what would you be trying to achieve?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Travel can definitely disrupt sleep — as can thousands if not millions or even billions of other things!
What matters most is how you respond when sleep doesn’t happen as you might want it to.
What’s been going on since you posted?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Megan! Your concerns are completely understandable and the thoughts being generated by your problem-solving brain make complete sense!
If you think back to a time when sleep wasn’t an issue or a concern, what kind of medication was needed for sleep to happen?
If you didn’t need medication back then, what might that suggest?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
A lot of the original posters in this thread have since graduated from the course.
It’d be great if any current postpartum clients shared in here — and in the meantime, here are some podcast episodes that might be relevant:
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
A sleep window is based on the sleep you are getting at the present time, medication or not. I wouldn’t usually suggest a sleep window of much less than six hours and a sleep window shouldn’t be less than your average nightly sleep duration over the past week or two.
A sleep window can still be helpful when taking medication if the amount of time you currently allot for sleep is a lot longer than how much sleep you usually get, if you find yourself going to bed earlier in an effort to make sleep happen, or if you find yourself staying in bed later in an attempt to “catch up” on sleep.
We’ll be exploring how to respond to waking during the night in a workable way in Week 2. In the meantime, there’s no need to get out of bed just because you’re awake — but you certainly can if you want to!
The goal here is to experience that time awake with less struggle and that can be done in bed or out of bed. Your choice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for letting me know you found this helpful!
Acknowledging your fears helps you accept their presence so they aren’t as easily able to pull you into a struggle that makes them even more difficult.
Validating the presence of fear and understanding that it’s a normal human emotion might also be an act of self-kindness, helping you move away from being hard on yourself for noticing their presence.
You are finding it helpful to remind yourself of your strengths and your experience and you have been reminded of your natural ability to experience successive nights of sleep.
I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward. It’s great to have you here 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing, Bobbi!
Your actions each day are guided by your values — not the sleep you got the night before or the thoughts and feelings that might be present. When you are awake at night there is no struggle.
If you were out of the waiting room, what would be different? And how much control do you have over the things that would get you out of the waiting room?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thank you so much for sharing!
By continuing to play around with noticing and acknowledging your thoughts and feelings (and how they can pull you into actions that don’t move you toward the life you want to live) you discovered that adding the phrase “and I don’t have to” gave you some space and a better opportunity to choose a workable response.
By allowing thoughts and feelings to be present without automatically trying to resist them, troubleshoot them, or seek reassurance, you found that you were better able to do more of the stuff that matters to you. And, you have found that the more you do that, the less power and influence all this stuff has over your life.
You are being more open, being more curious, and being kinder to yourself. You are more tolerant of uncertainty.
You are reclaiming your life — and that’s all down to the actions you are taking!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Bobbi!
It sounds like your experience tells you that when you wake during the night, you cannot make yourself fall asleep through effort and you cannot make your mind stop catastrophizing or generating certain thoughts and feelings. And so, for as long as you try to do those things, you might continue to feel stuck.
If you are practicing the AWAKE or NOW exercises with the goal of calming your mind, stopping thoughts, making sleep happen, or otherwise controlling or changing sleep or thoughts or feelings, you aren’t going to get anything from them — because that’s not their intention and none of those things are in your control.
The goal of the AWAKE exercise is to help you build skill in experiencing all these things with less struggle. More openness, more space. Being more of an observer rather than an opponent.
The goal of the NOW exercise is to help you refocus your attention so you can continue to do things that matter in the presence of unhelpful or distracting thoughts and feelings.
As you shared, you might not always feel joy when doing things that matter — especially after a night of battling with wakefulness and your mind.
Living by our values doesn’t always bring us joy (changing dirty diapers or standing up for ourselves or what we believe in, for example, isn’t always joyful).
What matters is that you are doing those things that matter, independently of the thoughts and feelings that might also show up. Those actions keep you moving in the direction you want to be heading.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Jay!
Breakups are hard. No doubt about it.
And at times of difficulty, stress, struggle, and heartache, it’s natural and normal to experience some sleep disruption.
None of that stuff can indefinitely overpower sleep drive, though. Sleep drive always wins in the end — it’s impossible to remain awake forever!
What matters is how you respond when things aren’t happening as you want them to happen. Thoughts and feelings are human and they are out of your direct control. Your experience also tells you that sleep is out of your control. So, for as long as you try to control those things, you are going to continue to struggle and make things harder for yourself.
Your response to all this stuff is what counts because your response is based on actions — and actions are within your control. You have all the power here. You get to decide if and how you’ll move toward the life you want to live each day.
You are practicing the AWAKE exercise to help you build skill in experiencing wakefulness and all the thoughts and feelings that can come with that, with less struggle. You are doing things that help you live a rich and meaningful life alongside the human emotion of grief.
As for your final question, I am not sure what dealing with grief before addressing insomnia would actually look like in practice — and how that would keep you moving in the direction you want to be heading. Would you like to share some more on that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
