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Thanks for the great question! Any action is probably “OK” as long as it reflects your values, moves you closer to the life you want to live, doesn’t try to control what cannot be controlled, and doesn’t harm yourself (or others)!
As you suggested, sleeping in later on some days might mean you don’t get sleepy until later on following nights, but it might not. And, whether or not that’s even a problem for you is something only you can answer!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You have been reminded that you are capable of good nights of sleep and you have been reminded that sleep doesn’t always happen as you might want it to — especially when life (and change) happens.
Change is often accompanied by all different thoughts and feelings including worry, stress anxiety, and sadness. Those are all normal and natural human thoughts and feelings.
Since they’re natural and normal human thoughts and feelings they don’t prevent sleep from happening. Trying to fight or avoid them can make sleep a lot more difficult, though — because sleep is less likely to show up if you are engaged in a battle.
As you consider how to move through this period of change, how might you deal with all those thoughts and feelings in a workable way so you are less likely to struggle with them?
And, since you are waiting for your job to begin, what might you do with your free time that reflects your values, interests, and the life you want to be living?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Focusing on practice with the intention of building skill in acknowledging and making space for wakefulness, thoughts, and feelings to show up with less struggle sounds like a workable way to move forward! Thanks for sharing, Asheena!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing this huge insight with us! Your strengths of curiosity and self-reflection supported you as you experimented with the AWAKE exercise and learned just how much you had been suppressing certain thoughts and feelings.
As you played around with an alternative approach of acknowledging and making space for thoughts and feelings to be present, you felt a sense of ease. Like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders.
When there’s less struggle and less resistance, sleep has a better opportunity to take care of itself. And you also free up so much energy and attention.
Practicing the AWAKE exercise won’t always lead to great sleep and it won’t always make certain thoughts and feelings change — and, as you know that’s not the intent of the exercise.
The intent is to practice building skill in experiencing all the stuff that shows up with less struggle. To allow it to show up, since you know it’s going to show up even if you don’t allow it to!
I wish you all the best as you continue to learn and continue to practice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s hard to remember wins and the good stuff when things are difficult — and that’s not unusual since the good stuff isn’t a threat that your problem-solving mind needs to address.
It’s entirely possible to build skill in expanding your focus and bringing more attention and awareness to the good stuff that exists when things are hard, though.
If you wanted to develop that skill, how might you get started?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s good to have you here!
Observing a sleep window can definitely be more difficult if you are woken multiple times by a baby!
What guidance does your own experience have to offer here? Without a sleep window, do things feel more workable? If so, you might prefer to allow experience to be your best guide — you are the expert on you!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing your experience and what you have been learning!
Through your commitment to action, you have demonstrated your ability to do things that matter, even after difficult nights. That keeps you moving toward the life you want to live, independently of sleep which — in turn — reduces the power and influence of insomnia.
You’ve also found how helpful it can be to acknowledge that what you are going through isn’t unique or unusual. It is shared with many others. You clearly have a growth mindset and know that change and ongoing growth and development is always possible.
I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to you both!
@pcainland — You are already exploring the concept of acceptance and it often takes time and ongoing practice to develop skill in genuine acceptance.As you develop that skill, the appearance of difficult or uncomfortable thoughts and feelings will be less likely to draw you into a battle — a struggle that gives them more power and more influence.
Your goal to train your brain that it is safe is a logical one — and one way you are doing that is to continue doing things that matter each day (even when difficult thoughts and feelings are present).
How might you respond at night when difficult thoughts and feelings show up and/or when you are awake when you’d rather be asleep in a way that moves you closer to that goal?
@jonathancdr — Thank you for offering your support, understanding, and empathy. You are looking for a more permanent solution compared to medication. Many people have found that here and I hope you do, too!—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the course 🙂
Ups and downs are a normal part of any journey. You’ve been reminded that you have a natural ability to sleep and that you do not have direct or permanent control over the amount or type of sleep you experience. You do, however, have full control over how you approach sleep and how you respond to what happens each night — and that can influence your level of struggle.
As you progress through this course you might find the approach to be a bit different to the traditional CBT-I way of dealing with insomnia!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello MN Mom and welcome to the forum. You are not alone.
You want a good night’s sleep. And you probably don’t want to experience anxiety or feel depressed. You are a human being after all!
The insomnia struggle often comes with lots of difficult thoughts and feelings such as anxiety and depression. It’s rarely about sleep alone. It’s about sleep and it’s about our thoughts and it’s about how we feel and it’s about how we act in response to all those things.
When sleep wasn’t an issue or a struggle, what did you do to make that kind of sleep happen? In what ways — if any — does that differ to what you are doing now?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing your progress! You have noticed that your sleep has improved significantly and anxiety is losing its power and influence. That’s all down to the ongoing actions you’re taking to build skill in experiencing all this stuff with less struggle.
Since you have a human brain, anxiety still shows up — just as other thoughts and human feelings show up. And now, when that happens, you are less likely to get pulled into a battle with your mind. A battle that just makes things more difficult.
Instead, you are acknowledging the thoughts you notice, thanking your brain for looking out for you, and reminding yourself that thoughts are thoughts. Nothing more. Nothing less.
What makes you feel that having a brain that looks out for you by generating certain thoughts and feelings is some kind of disorder?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
When you do something with the intention of making sleep happen, you set yourself up for an ongoing struggle.
Thanks for sharing that powerful insight — an insight that only revealed itself thanks to your superpowers of curiosity, honesty, and self-reflection.
Moving forward, what will your intention be when you practice the AWAKE exercise?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
How will you not let it go so deep? What guidance does your experience have to offer about your ability to directly control such thoughts, feelings, or whether your brain activates the “fight or flight” response?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You are making change happen thanks to your commitment to action. You are learning from what you are doing and it feels like you are moving in the direction you want to be heading.
Implementing a sleep window has also led to you spending less time in bed and that has given you more time to live your life.
As for when to adjust your sleep window, you can do that based on how things have been going over the past week or two:
1. If you feel you are at the point where your current sleep window is taking sleep away from you (you aren’t spending much time awake during your sleep window), you might experiment with a slightly longer sleep window.
2. If you feel you might be able to get a bit more sleep with a longer sleep window and any time spent awake during your sleep window is pleasant and comfortable (ie there’s no struggle) then you might experiment with a slightly longer sleep window.
And, as a reminder, waking during sleep is a normal part of sleep — nobody truly stays asleep throughout the night 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the great question, Phil!
Your wife is a snorer and, although you have experience in sleeping perfectly fine alongside her, you are now wondering whether it might be worth sleeping apart.
As you consider this dilemma, you are concerned that if you get used to sleeping apart, difficulty might show up again as soon as you return to sharing a bed with her. So, the idea of sleeping apart might not feel like a sustainable, long-term solution.
What might be most important here is your answer to this question: would sleeping in a separate room from your wife be an action that moves you toward the life you want to live, or away from the life you want to live?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
