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Thanks for the great question!
How we sleep can definitely influence how we feel each day. And it’s not the only thing that influences how we feel (and how we feel can often vary and change throughout the day).
It sounds like the time you spend awake at night is calm, peaceful, and pleasant. So, there doesn’t seem to be any fatigue-inducing struggle going on there.
During the day, you are noticing physical body anxiety symptoms. What, specifically, are those symptoms, how do you choose to respond to them, and what are you learning from how you respond to them?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You recognize that without change, nothing changes — and change isn’t easy (especially when it’s important).
You might find it helpful to revisit the Week 2 materials in particular, if you are interested in exploring and practicing an alternative way of responding to all those thoughts and feelings that show up when you are awake at night.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your experience of sleeping on the couch has taught you that you are able to fall asleep and generate sleep!
It sounds as though you have an awareness that the couch itself isn’t magically generating sleep — there’s some kind of issue that shows up when you go to bed that seems to result in conditions for sleep not being as good versus being on the couch.
You’ve identified that conditioned arousal might be at play here. Your brain has learned to associate the bed with battling and struggling. So, when you go to bed it fires up to protect and prepare you for that — even if you might not be involved in a battle or a struggle (perhaps there’s some past experience at play here).
Ultimately, you get to decide what you want to do — because you are the expert on yourself! If sleeping on the couch is a workable way forward for you, there’s no need to do anything differently. If you’d rather be sleeping in bed, what might you need to do to give that the opportunity to happen?
As for your other question — if you’d rather spend your wind-down time in bed reading a book, what, specifically, would you be trying to achieve by denying yourself (what sounds like) the more desirable action of reading in bed?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It feels like things are opening back up — a weight has been lifted — as you consider giving yourself permission to do whatever you want! That, in turn, chips away at the power and influence sleep has held over your life.
Your concern about blue light is valid and understandable. And, if blue light is what caused or kept insomnia alive, avoiding blue light would get rid of insomnia. Insomnia wouldn’t exist because as soon as someone found themselves struggling with sleep, they’d wear blue blocking glasses or avoid screens and everything would be good with their sleep again.
Since we know that doesn’t happen, we might determine that blue light probably has far less of an influence on sleep that we might have thought (and how many great sleepers watch TV at night and scroll on their phones in bed at night?).
With all this being said, you are the expert on you — and the opportunity always exists to conduct an experiment for a week or two, then reflect on what you learned!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Jack 🙂
Whether or not tired eyes are a sign of sleepiness might vary from person to person since the definition of “tired eyes” might vary from person to person!
I’d suggest that if you’re finding it hard to keep your eyes open — especially if combined with other sleepiness symptoms such as a bobbing head — that could very well indicate sleepiness (which is different to fatigue).
If your eyes feel tired and you aren’t struggling and fighting to stay awake, you might be less likely to be experiencing sleepiness.
In terms of the cause of tired eyes, I know we’ve communicated separately about this, but for the benefit of others who might experience this I would say that tired eyes can be caused by many different things.
Sleep (or lack of it) and fatigue can definitely influence how our eyes (and many other parts of the body) feel — as can other things, such as air quality, heat, light, medical issues, etc.
If anyone is concerned by a sensation or symptom it’s worth speaking with a doctor. If there’s no medical cause it might come down to exploring what the most workable way of responding to such feelings or sensations would be.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I’ve heard so many different things that nothing really comes as much of a surprise or sounds unusual anymore!
I’ve heard of people experiencing twitches and other sensations when they are relaxed, others when they are alert, while others don’t seem to experience or notice anything at all.
You shared that you are starting to respond “less negatively” to the leg twitches — what does that involve?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your experience suggests that your sleep system is working just as it should be — after nights of less (or no) sleep you are more likely to experience more (or some) sleep on subsequent nights.
Your experience also seems to be telling you that sleep is out of your direct control and the more you (completely understandably) try to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen, the more difficult it can become.
Thoughts and feelings (such as fear) can be uncomfortable and they come from your brain doing its job of looking out for you. Your experience might also suggest they are out of your direct control and cannot be permanently deleted or switched off upon command!
Medication changes (including withdrawal) can certainly make things more challenging and it can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when things are difficult. And, as your experience tells you, that light exists — you have experience in getting through difficult challenges and adversity. You are resilient!
As you reflect on your experience, what opportunities are there to deal with all this difficult stuff in a different way (if you feel your current approach isn’t really working for you)?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Waking is a normal part of sleep, so there’s nothing unusual with noticing yourself waking before you want to be getting out of bed to start your day.
Your experience seems to tell you that you cannot make yourself fall back to sleep through effort.
And, it feels as though you can’t break the habitual response of researching supplements and meds over and over again. Since that response is action-based, it’s always within your control even when it feels it’s not.
If you don’t want to be responding by researching supplements and meds, what might you do instead and how might that alternative response serve you better?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sleep duration might increase and it might not. Sleep takes care of itself!
Let’s say that you were getting the exact amount and type of sleep you wanted to get every single night — what would you then be doing differently with your life?
That kind of question could help expand the focus of your attention away from sleep (something you can’t control) and toward actions (something you can always control) and the real reason(s) why you want sleep to be a certain way.
I hope there’s something useful here 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Perhaps it’s less about being woken and more about how you might respond to being woken?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for going “all in” — and welcome to the forum 🙂
You have the idea that thinking or talking about insomnia will make it real or worse — and your experience tells you that insomnia shows up and does what it wants whether or not you think about it or talk about it.
What’s the opportunity here? 🤔
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You have a wonderful source of support in your spouse!
Fear is going to show up no matter what you do. So, perhaps what matters most is taking action that matters to you — that reflects who you are, who you want to be, and the life you want to live.
Do that, and fear will show up. Don’t do that, and fear will show up.
If you took the action of moving away from the medication, what would you do instead when sleep doesn’t happen as you might want it to?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Things are changing and you are making change happen.
You are practicing the AWAKE exercise to build skill in noticing and making space for wakefulness and whatever thoughts and feelings choose to show up. The result is less struggling and battling (and better conditions for sleep).
You are not tracking sleep and that takes the pressure off and reduces the judgement and subsequent performance anxiety.
A weight has been lifted now the nights aren’t filled with struggle and a list of things you need to do to try to make sleep happen. As you shared, there’s less drama!
You have started to taper off medication and stayed committed to that action even when a bad night of sleep showed up and even when difficult thoughts and feelings showed up — because that’s an action that’s important to you.
You are continuing to do things that matter each day and you are doing that with kindness — dialing things back a bit as needed, yet still doing things that reflect who you are and the life you want to live.
The focus of your attention is expanding. Thoughts no longer revolve around sleep and little else. You have come so far because of your own actions, your own strengths, and your own commitment to change.
Thanks for sharing and I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That sounds challenging. Have you spoken to a doctor about your experience and whether there might be any treatment options for the twitches?
It sounds like the twitches become more noticeable and more disruptive when you want sleep to happen. When you are feeling relaxed and giving sleep the opportunity to show up. When you are wide awake and not trying to make sleep happen, they seem to disappear.
As for dealing with this now, as the expert on yourself, what are your thoughts on that? What feels like the most workable way to respond that will help you move forward and not get pulled into a struggle that makes things even more difficult?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You could always try starting the sleep window an hour earlier — bearing in mind that if you don’t feel sleepy enough for sleep when it begins, it might still be worth delaying going to bed until you are feeling sleepy enough for sleep (finding it hard to stay awake).
Perhaps there’s an opportunity to conduct an experiment for a week or so, reflect, and go from there!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
