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And sleep can still happen even when we think about it 😜
It can become a lot more elusive when we try to “not” think, though! And that’s why observing thoughts rather than resisting them can often be a strategy worth experimenting with — just as you shared, @hiker!
We’ll be exploring that (and a lot more) as the course progresses 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome aboard!
A sleep window is usually handled the same because all insomnia is the same — it comes from trying to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen. This can show itself as difficulty falling asleep and it can show itself as difficulty falling back to sleep.
One way we can try making a certain amount or type of sleep happen is allotting an excessive amount of time for sleep — way more than we usually spend asleep.
If you aren’t doing that, a sleep window might not be too important or relevant. If feel you might be doing that, keeping a sleep window — at least for a week or two — might offer a learning opportunity.
Is there anything useful here, @Cata?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the great questions!
I would typically suggest coming up with a sleep window duration first (based on how much sleep you typically get on an average night) and then by choosing an out-of-bed time in the morning that feels right to you and works for the life you want to live.
Then, you’d use the duration to count back from your out-of-bed time to get the start of your sleep window.
The sleep window is a tool intended to help you move away from chasing after sleep. It cannot make a certain amount or type of sleep happen. It’s also a learning tool, so I would suggest sticking with a sleep window for at least a week or so before reflecting on what you learned and deciding whether or not you’d like to make any changes.
Feeling sleepy before the sleep window and then alert when you go to bed is extremely common. Before the sleep window begins there’s no pressure or effort to make sleep happen. So you notice it showing up.
Once the sleep window begins, the pressure and effort can kick in — and your brain can ramp up the alertness levels to protect you from what it predicts to be the battle that is about to begin.
If you decide not to commit to the sleep window (you are the expert on you, after all), what would you be doing instead — and, according to your experience, how useful is that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Doing anything other than battling sounds like a more workable way of experiencing nighttime wakefulness!
As for whether activities are restful enough — if your experience tells you that you cannot make sleep or sleepiness happen through effort, perhaps that’s less relevant compared to simply giving yourself the opportunity to experience being awake without it drawing you into a battle.
And you can do something other than battle when you’re in bed and when you’re out of bed. The choice of location is yours!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for coming back with an update!
You committed to an approach of acceptance rather than resistance. That was not easy. In fact, it was really hard — especially the first night.
You learned from your experience and you stayed committed to an action that moved you in the direction you wanted to be heading even though it was hard and even though it came with lots of difficult thoughts and feelings.
With your commitment to action, you feel more confident that you are moving away from an endless struggle. And, with less of that active resistance and battling, you’ve noticed sleep is better able to take care of itself, too!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing where you are, at this early stage of your journey!
A hospital environment makes it harder for you to follow your own kind of schedule and it also means you don’t have as much control over your environment. And, you are continuing regardless. You aren’t giving up. You are doing the best you can.
You shared that your goal is to get seven to eight hours of sleep. If that happened, what would you be doing differently with your life?
I’m also curious — if you’d like to be starting your day around 7:30 AM, what made you decide to end your sleep window at 6:30 AM?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your response is now more flexible. It’s not just resist at all costs (and you know where that gets you)!
It’s easy to get pulled back into a struggle and to notice yourself chasing after sleep. Simply being able to notice when that’s happening is a superpower because it gives you the opportunity to respond differently.
Thanks to your strengths of honesty and self-awareness, you have more clarity about the intention behind your actions. So, whenever you notice your actions are trying to control what you know from experience is out of your control, you can kindly bring your attention to that and decide how you want to respond.
You are continuing to learn and to practice. That’s what counts and that’s the truest reflection of progress 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
These teachings came into your life at just the right time. Perhaps without all your prior experience, you might not have been inclined to take the route shared in this course! Your experience helped guide you forward.
You’ve come a long way and that’s entirely down to your curiosity, your willingness to explore a different approach, and your commitment to experimenting with and practicing what is shared in the course.
You feel as though you’ve got your life back. You feel more resilient. As you reflect on your future, it feels like your experience with insomnia has actually contributed to your personal growth and development.
How easy it would have been to quit when you felt stuck. You didn’t quit, though. And look at where you are now (and where you might be in the future).
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Glad to hear it — you are doing better because you remained curious, continued to reflect and learn from your actions, and committed to practicing what is shared in the course 👍
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You have clarity. You know that trying to control what is out of your control is the ultimate source of ongoing struggle.
As you shared, you have tools to draw from whenever you find yourself struggling or feel as though your actions are disconnected from your values.
You feel more confident about moving forward, toward the life you want to live.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You finished working through the six weeks of the course and thanks to your ongoing commitment to practice, you have become better able to accept wakefulness (rather than battle with it). As a result, nights are calmer — not a bloody battleground!
As for what causes wakefulness — the answer is anything can cause it. The brain never shuts down during sleep. It’s still monitoring your surroundings for threats. Waking, therefore, is a completely normal part of sleep.
The more we resist those awakenings, the more noticeable and memorable they become (and the more of a struggle they can create) — as you know from experience!
You are able to acknowledge the thoughts your problem-solving brain is generating as it does its job of looking out for you — thoughts that usually lean toward “worst possible outcome” and all the other doom and gloom stuff (because good stuff isn’t a threat).
And you are responding in a workable way. Giving it space to exist. To come and go as it wishes. That doesn’t mean the vigilance ends (your brain still has a job to do) — it just means you aren’t engaged in an active and exhausting struggle through the night.
It sounds like you are heading in the direction you want to be heading. As the expert on yourself, what do you feel is the best way to continue moving forward?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing!
You are continuing to work through the course materials and — most importantly — you are continuing to take action. You are continuing to practice and develop new skills. And you are continuing to learn from what you are doing.
Your actions are moving you closer to where you want to be. You are doing things (like taking a course) even though it means getting home later. You are better able to notice the good stuff around you — stuff that before, might have gone unnoticed.
You are getting better at refocusing your attention because of your commitment to ongoing practice of the AWAKE exercise. Your actions better reflect (and serve) your values.
You haven’t needed to get much practice in with the AWAKE exercise, but you know it’s a tool that’s available for you to use as needed.
Although you noticed a feeling of anxiety connected to moving away from medication, you took action anyway. And, you stayed committed even when that got hard.
You have noticed the change and growth that has happened since you got started working on all this. And, that change and growth is entirely to your credit — you did the work.
I wish you all the best as you continue to move forward 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your experience doesn’t sound unusual. What feels like the best way to move forward, as you reflect on your experience?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I’m happy to chime in here to share my observations. I don’t see any “best” way of moving away from medication or supplements. A really slow taper, a really fast taper, going cold turkey, or anything in between.
What seems to matter most is having a plan that feels realistic, and then sticking to it — regardless of what each night might bring.
As the expert on yourself, what do you feel a plan might look like for you?
(I’ll also add as a PS that melatonin doesn’t generate sleep — so all the sleep you’ve been getting while taking it is sleep that your body has generated all by itself.)
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You clearly have a growth mindset and you are a powerful problem solver!
It sounds like you enjoy lying with your daughter and reading until she falls sleep. When you notice difficult thoughts and feelings showing up, you practice the AWAKE exercise.
Having the intention to remain awake until 11:30 PM would be aligned with keeping a sleep window with an earliest possible “bedtime” (or “sleep opportunity time”). And it might be hard to stay awake until then in such a cozy, warm, and loving environment!
You are trying to maintain a consistent out of bed time in the morning to help anchor your body clock, ensure time for sleep drive to build during the day, and give you the opportunity to do things that matter and to live the kind of life you want to live.
What changes — if any — do you want to make, and why?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
