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Hello Olivia and welcome to the forum! What time do you usually go to bed at night, what time do you usually get out of bed to start your day in the morning and — over the past couple of weeks or so — what would you say your average nightly sleep duration is, if you had to guess?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
In my experience, people who say they fall asleep as soon as their head hits the pillow might be exaggerating a little (if we fall asleep instantly that suggests we might be sleep deprived). Most people without any issues with sleep take around 10-30 minutes to fall asleep, on “average”.
You raise an interesting question — do people fall asleep quickly because they accept it as a gift? And, why are they not acknowledging the appearance of difficult nights when they show up?
I think that, generally speaking, we tend to fall asleep effortlessly when we don’t get involved in the process of sleep. So, perhaps people fall asleep (or don’t get tangled up in long stretches of difficult nights) because of a lack of effort to make sleep happen?
Perhaps, even when difficult nights happen, they might be less likely to intervene and, as a result, sleep is able to recover relatively quickly?
Perhaps it’s not so much that they’re not acknowledging what’s going on (the appearance of insomnia) but that they are not acknowledging it as (or perceiving it to be) a problem that needs to be addressed or fixed?
Of course, when we’re faced with a problem most of us are hard-wired to try to fix that problem — and that’s where it’s so easy to get stuck because with sleep, the more we try to fix it the more tangled up we can get in a struggle with it.
Thanks for posting this topic — it’s an interesting area of discussion, that’s for sure!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Is your approach toward sleep different now compared to how it was a few weeks ago when it seemed to happen so effortlessly and so naturally? If so, what might that mean? Are there any insights there?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum! Can you share your goals with us? What are you trying to achieve and what would be different in your life if you were able to achieve those goals?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It can be very difficult — you’re right! Have the alternative approaches of not getting out of bed and/or not implementing any kind of sleep schedule proven to be more effective at getting you where you want to be?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That sounds really tough. What kind of things is your mind telling you when that fear of sleep shows up and how do you usually respond?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello and welcome to the forum! Have you talked to your doctor about your desire to move away from the medication? If so, what did they suggest?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Do you think you might find it helpful to move away from trying to fight or avoid nighttime wakefulness and trying to make sleep happen at night? Do you think there’s any chance all the trying and all the effort (if it exists) might be making things more difficult?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though you’re responding in a way that’s less likely to get you tangled up in a struggle — which is good! Wakefulness itself is something we all experience when we’re in bed, for varying amounts of time. It’s when we struggle with it that it tends to become more difficult!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You got it! Thanks for letting me know that was helpful!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thank you so much for sharing these insights with us!
It sounds as though you have been finding it helpful to commit to doing things that matter to you (even if difficult nights and difficult thoughts and feelings show up), that you are feeling more comfortable with wakefulness (and being in bed regardless of whether you are awake or asleep), and that you are moving away from trying to fight or avoid difficult thoughts and feelings.
As a result, it sounds as though you are finding that you’re better able to live the kind of life you want to live, independently of sleep!
Great stuff — and it’s all down to your own ongoing practice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome! As you have found, it can sometimes be hard to avoid the time — it’s everywhere, right?!
I think this comes down to intent. If you’re actively seeking out the time and repeatedly checking the time, that might not be helpful. If you’re simply noticing the time, that’s probably less of an issue!
Does this help?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum!
If you feel that you might benefit from a different approach, I think you’d find my online course helpful. The different approach involves implementing behaviors that help create and maintain good conditions for sleep while also building new skills in responding to nighttime wakefulness and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that might come with (or after!) it in a more workable way — a way that helps remove you from the battle and moves you away from the ongoing struggle that can make things so much more difficult.
I am not sure of the science behind the claim that a heart rate needs to be below 65 for sleep to happen. Sleep will always happen when we’ve been awake for long enough, regardless of how quickly or slowly our heart might be beating. And, in any case, we cannot directly control our heart rate, right?
If your heart rate is a concern, it’s important to talk to your doctor! If there’s no explanation, it might be related to the struggle — all the effort that’s being put into making sleep happen, getting rid of wakefulness, trying to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia. When we are preparing for (or engaged in) a battle, it makes sense that our heart rates would increase!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome aboard — I’ve moved your post into the client forum now you’ve enrolled!
You definitely are not alone and we’ll be exploring all the challenges and issues you described as the course progresses 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sometimes routines can be helpful, and sometimes they can be unhelpful. And often, the difference comes down to how controllable our goal might be.
If we follow a routine because it helps us get to work on time and do things that are important to us, then that’s more likely to be helpful.
If we follow a routine because we are trying to make sleep happen, get rid of wakefulness, or fight or avoid difficult thoughts and feelings, that might be less helpful — since we cannot directly or permanently control any of that stuff.
A sleep window isn’t something that can make sleep happen. What it can do is help us move away from chasing after sleep, trying to make it happen (something that can make things more difficult).
You could always experiment with allowing yourself to go to bed a bit earlier than the start of your sleep window if you feel sleepy enough for sleep. The loss of sleepiness you described can happen when our brain fires up to “protect” us from what it considers to be the threat of nighttime wakefulness — and it can learn to think of wakefulness as a threat because of all the effort we might put into trying to fight or avoid it!
You mentioned that you experience hours of stage 1 sleep — did you learn that from polysomnography in a sleep lab?
As you continue to work through the course we’ll be exploring ways of responding to wakefulness that might also help you retrain the brain that wakefulness isn’t a threat that it needs to be quite so alert to protect you from at night!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
